'TUF 10' Episode 11 Recap: Hey, Can We Just Cram the Last Four Fights Into One Episode and Be Done With This Goddamned Thing?
After his latest “Do you wanna be an [expletive] fighter” speech on the last episode, Dana White is surprised that nobody is stepping over Matt Mitrione to take his spot, which is strange because Scott Junk made it very clear that he’d just do that, wrecked eye notwithstanding. One guy who definitely isn’t down to fight is (wait for it) Kimbo Slice, who’s concerned about his arthritis-stricken knee and starts throwing out excuses. Bottom line is, he won’t be able to perform at full strength, and he can’t stomach another loss, so he’d just rather not fight, if that’s cool.
“I am in no position to fight a kickboxer like James McSweeney at this point,” he says, adding that it would “demise” him a little bit taking the fight knowing he wasn’t healthy. Dana White is a little taken back; he didn’t expect this from Kimbo, whose gameness was supposed to be his best quality. But that’s the situation. The season’s poster boy turns out to be a total bust. I demand a refund.
Luckily, Matt Mitrione feels healthy again. He tells Rashad that he's been cleared to fight, and Rashad tells us "I bet he called the doctor and the doctor said ‘listen kid, I told you two days ago you could fight,'” which is hilarious because that's pretty much exactly how it went down. Finally, Mitrione admits that his head injury story was exaggerated to mess with James McSweeney and keep himself entertained. Ohhhhh, now it all makes sense...
McSweeney is thrilled to be fighting Mitrione. He feels his standup is far superior, and he'll be looking for the head-kick knockout.
Junk's career might be jeopardy due to Mitrione's eye pokes. Big Baby takes it very personally, and wants to stomp Mitrione out when he gets back to the gym. “I'll kill you motherfucker!" He screams. "Give me a reason! Give me a reason!” Marcus wants to choke Matt, beat him, then break his arm, because that’s the pain that Scott Junk has, waking up every day. His teammates eventually talk him down. Says Rashad: “You go into a fight and you hope you come out the way you came in, but there’s no guarantee.”
But there's good news: Junk's surgery was a success. His doctor doesn’t recommend he keep fighting, but whatever, he's a big boy and he'll do what he wants.
For the third quarterfinal match, McSweeney weighs in at a meager 229 pounds compared to Mitrione's bulky 256. Mitrione also has a six-inch reach advantage, despite being an inch shorter. Dana says that Mitrione "easily" takes this if he fights the way he did against Junk. So keep throwing those eye-pokes, Meathead. After a particularly intense staredown, McSweeney shoves Mitrione, and Mitrione repeatedly licks his fingers in anger.
It's time to party...
Round 1: McSweeney opens with a leg kick, then a body kick. And another leg kick. Mitrione lands a sharp 1-2. McSweeney throws two more leg kicks, and Mitrione scores with a straight left. They trade kicks. Teep kick McSweeney, and a right cross. Mitrione dashes in with a punch. Another big right from McSweeney and another teep. Mitrione blasts forward with a punch combo, McSweeney returns fire, and they clinch. McSweeney tosses him to the mat. Mitrione looks for a leg lock from the bottom. McSweeney escapes, and gets on top, slugging Mitrione in the ribs. He locks on a guillotine choke as Mitrione tries to get to his feet and torques it. Mitrione taps immediately — "like a bitch," as he says. After the fight, he squashes his beef with McSweeney.
Next up is Marcus Jones vs. Darrill Schoonover. Jones feels Darrill is dangerous because he "takes a lickin’ and keeps on tickin’." But hey, he ain’t gonna lose to a guy with titties. I mean, the guy has titties.
Round 1: Jones throws a leg kick, then clinches and takes Schoonover down. Jones moves to side control. He passes his leg over Schoonover's head in an odd-looking crucifix variant and punches Schoonover in the face. He repeats this process two more times before shifting his focus to Schoonover's arms, looking for a kimura. Schoonover rolls to escape, but Jones puts him right back down, and ends up in Schoonover's guard. Schoonover kicks Jones off, but Big Baby dives back on. Darrill kicks Jones off again, and tries to buttscoot away, but Jones stalks him down and jumps back in his guard. Jones starts throwing heavy punches and knocks Darrill out. “I hope the judges gave us that one,” Rampage says. Dana and Rashad are very impressed with Jones's performance. Rashad vows to start calling Jones by his real nickname (The Darkness) instead of Big Baby.
The semi-final matchups will be Roy Nelson vs. James McSweeney and Brendan Schaub vs. Marcus Jones.
Rashad Evans starts dissing Tiki’s MySpace page and the fruity nutshot pics contained within. The payful ribbing turns to a heated confrontation between the coaches. “I can’t wait to beat the brakes off you,” Rampage says. "You aint even gonna wake up homey. Dubba-dubba-you-bee frog-lookin’ ass."
If Marcus wins, all of Rashad's crap goes out the window. The gameplan is for Marcus to take Brendan down and finish him quickly. Marcus can still tackle a motherfucker if he needs to. He once tackled Barry Sanders in an open field.
Tiki has one more prank left in him. He brings in a bunch of pink stuffed animals and puts them in Team Rashad's locker room, which Team Rampage paints pink. They also add a disco ball. “We changed the room to make it like his room probably looks at his own house,” Rampage says. Rashad does not approve of the new decor. He angrily sucks a pacifier then spits it out, realizing the thing was probably up Tiki's ass at some point.
Zak "Linderman" Jensen finally reaches his breaking point. First, he allows McSweeney to write on his head, and is shocked when McSweeney writes "Lindagay" instead of "Linderman." Later, while he's taking a dump, McSweeney opens some drawers in the bathroom to barricade Jensen inside the shitter. Jensen, who's claustrophobic, freaks out. Finally, McSweeney unblocks him, and Jensen comes out of the bathroom throwing punches. McSweeney fires back and gets Jensen in a guillotine. Best fight of the season, easy. McSweeney lets Jensen go after he promises to settle down. “James is a prostitute’s used douchebag,” Jensen says.
Rashad comes by to do some positive visualization, and tells McSweeney to think of every fight as his last. Trevor Wittman comes by to drop some horrible rhymes: "When you are in the room getting your hands wrapped tight, you are ready for this big ass fight...Keep your focus. This ain’t hocus pocus." Wow. Get this man on Def Poetry Jam.
Roy vs. James is up. James tweaks his nip to get his mind right.
Round 1: McSweeney tries a looping right. Nelson with a jab, McSweeney with a leg kick. McSweeney is wild with his punches, and his chin is way out. Nelson bulls in, and McSweeney grabs an arm-in guillotine. It looks tight, but Nelson gets out, and they separate. McSweeney lands a leg kick and a jab, then a knee to the body from a clinch. Nelson lands a hard right, and McSweeney is stunned. Nelson shoots and takes McSweeney down. He moves from half-guard to side control and sets up his trademark crucifix. Nelson smothers from the top. McSweeney tries to buck him, but Big Country is too heavy. With McSweeney's head exposed and his arms pinned, Nelson starts punching, and they’re hard ones. McSweeney flails his legs, but can’t do anything to stop the abuse, and the ref stops the fight. Finally, Roy earns Dana’s begrudging respect.
Rashad calls Rampage a bitch and walks away, then comes back and says it again, right up in his face. “Treat me like a bitch right now,” Rampage says, no less than 30 times. Rashad brushes his head against Rampage's, and Rampage is ready to kill. “Throw it baby, let it happen...treat me like a motherfucking bitch," Rampage says. “I can’t wait to treat you like a bitch, 'cuz you gonna be a real good bitch," Rashad says. Instinctively, I hit the pause button on my DVR.
And here, we, go...
Round 1: Schaub lands a right hand off the bell, and Jones immediately takes him to the mat. Jones moves to side control rather easily, and sets up a crucifix, but Schaub bucks out. Jones scores mount. He tries to posture up, and Schaub escapes, re-establishing half guard then getting his feet. Schaub unloads with punches, but eats a knee to the head. Jones seems like he's tired already. He drops his hands a bit, and Schaub rocks him with a right cross, dropping him to the mat. Schaub finishes the fight with heavy strikes from the top.
Jones tells us that this might be his last day fighting. "I don’t want to put my wife through that anymore," he says. Rampage acts like a coach for once, consoling Jones and telling him that the losses will make him stronger.
And so, fighting for the TUF 10 heavyweight contract will be Brendan Schaub vs. Roy Nelson, who Dana lovingly refers to as "the guy with the worst physique in sports."
The big surprise about Kimbo's future turns out to be that he'll be fighting Houston Alexander in the finale. NO, SERIOUSLY?!? Also fighting on Saturday will be Marcus Jones vs. Matt Mitrione, Darrill Schoonover vs. James McSweeney, and Justin Wren vs. Jon Madsen.
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Roac Says:
I liked the episode, too bad Jones didnt win.
Defender Says:
I can say that episode was the most entertaining of the season. Watching Marcus get all up on Matts shit was pretty good. Too bad Brendan called it right down the middle about how Marcus prolly can't take a shot.
For all of Kimbo's animosity, I gotta respect a dude who knows when not to go out and embarrass himself. Would his knee keep him from fighting? Yeah...I suppose. Was he scared of losing again? Maybe at the time...but with Houston coming up it doesn't much matter.
Roy Nelson...he needs to die. If all we get to look forward to is him either slogging out a decision, or getting someone in a crucifix...they will create a lower undercard just for him.
Oh wait! There is no fucking way that will ever happen because even the undercard guys would whoop that ass. Isn't the whole idea to strive to be the best and win gold...and more money? When I think of the top HW's right now...there isn't a single one that wouldn't stomp a hole in Roy. Cain? Carwin? For the love of God...Brock!?
Not to say much good about Brendan. Nice enough guy I suppose...but he has a long road to walk.
All in all, I'm glad it's over. I'll watch the life finale...but just can't bring myself to care about the winner. I'm more excited to find out how my Des Moines guy Joe Brammer does than anything else.
J-Dog Says:
Worst. Season. Ever. And I'll explain why I feel that way. The only real reason is the way the producers rode Kimbo Slice's nutsack and fed us the "will Kimbo return next week?" bullshit week after week like a broken record. It pissed me off to the point that I almost didn't even watch anymore. Fuck Kimbo. If they would have just taken out all the Kimbo ass rimming out of the show and did something, anything different with that extra time it may have saved it for me... and don't insult our intelligence by baiting us week after week with the prospect of some one-dimensional internet brawler coming back to fight. Who fucking cared if Kimbo came back anyway? He would have just lost again unless he caught someone with a clean punch before getting taken down.
mustache ride Says:
Yeah best episode of the worst season ever. James Mcsweeny is the new Justin Mcully, he will get his shit pushed in by up and comers for the UFC.
I don't understand how Roy impressed Dana last night with the same fight he fought against KImbo?
ReX13 Says:
Ok, so...between Wikipedia, Australians, and the commercials for the finale, it was hard to be surprised about the finals. Dammit.
There was a lot of hype heading into this season, with Dana saying it was awesome, and unbelievable, and whatever hey DW the fights were pretty shitty, ok? What, are you hanging out with Rogan before the TUF fights? 'Cause i'm pretty sure you're high.
Strangely, though, there are more fighters than normal that i want to see in the UFC. Demico Rogers did not get enough camera time, but he could be fun to watch. Who doesn't want to see Big Baby Darkness a few more times? Obviously, Kimbo isn't going anywhere, and if he stops fighting, i hope they put him on the mic at some events. His mellifluous voice, coupled with his hilarious spoonerisms, mixed metaphors, and general mangling of language, would be worth the price of a Bisbing v/s McSweeney card. Speaking of Mcprostitute'suseddouchebag, some of these fighters **need** to drop down to 205. Heavyweight has obviously become the land of the giants. Also needing to drop the doughnuts: Kimbo (i know Ferg, you're working on it) and Titties. Here's hoping that a rotation in the sandbox helps Schoonover down around 215.
And i hate to say it, but i finally got tired of the Rampage-Evans shit talking marathon last night. It was usually comic goodness, but after two up close sessions in one night, it was just too much of the same old. Of course, it doesn't help that Jackson wants to go all pussified actor on us and duck fights. (Yeah, i said it. It needed to be said.)
Little side question: what would be involved in carving out another weight class between heavy and superheavy? It's obvious that the UFC wants some more champs, and damn it's a long way from 206 to 265...
Defender Says:
@ Rex - I can get behind the idea of some of those guys getting down to 205. It's not as much fun being able to eat whatever you want...but if they want a fighting career...they can't expect to beat guys like Mir, Lesnar or Velasquez.
Of course...I don't feel like a single one of them could beat Lyoto either.
busted_cranium Says:
So Kimbo didn't make his big return and run roughshod through the rest of the competition? Who could have guessed that?
I stopped watching this season about three weeks ago and started watching America's Next Top Model instead. At least I got a few wanks out of that shit.
Zenom Says:
I found it very annoying that Kimbo constantly would make comments that he "was here to bang" and "I want to be an ultimate fighter". Then all of a sudden when the opportunity arose, he backed out. Its arthritis in his knee, not a career ending injury from what they said.
Also I find it hilarious that Rampage was always telling people like "Titties" to step to him again, then when Rashad did it, he backed down. Rampage didn't throw, he just said "treat me like a bitch", which I think Rashad pretty much did.
Tai-Pan Says:
I was never sold on watching Evans vs Rampage actually fight until last night. Without a doubt I would pay for that pay-per-view now. Something about Diego and Penn now seems empty.
Nelson or Shaub?
mybongsnameisgr... Says:
@ defender
I don't think anybody off this show could beat Lyoto's meat for him.
they'd prolly do it wrong and fuck up his drink machine.
fACE7biter Says:
Some of those guys should definitely drop to 205, but the weight class in general needs to be addressed. Theres no reason there should be 60 pounds of leighway in one class when there's generally only 15-20 pounds in every other.
I'm happy to see Brendan and Roy advance out of all the semi-finalists. Marcus, while very impressive on the ground, was just far too immature and overly emotional. The fact that he immediately said after losing that this may be his last fight shows he justs a woman. Has he never seen anybody from TUF get a UFC contract despite not winningv the show?! Plus he already has a "grudge match" with Mitrione. You know, the guy who accidently poked Junk in the eye, which turned out to be nothing, which wasn't intentional, and had nothing to do with Marcus. Stick a tampoon in it Darkness.
McSweeney was just a cunt the whole season. I fucking loved seeing him lose to Nelson after getting so cocky that he stuck his chin out. Big Country proceeds to rattle his brain, and then take him right down, and BOOM, crucifix followed by headpunches, you're dun dada. Say what you will about Nelson, he's a very smart fighter, who picks his spots, capitilizes on his opponent's mistakes, and most important out of everyone in this house, manages his CARDIO very well.
Gotta give some credit to Brendan too. After kind of an ugly performance against Madsen, and getting gnp'd mostly by Demico, he finally had a masterful performance. That was how you fight a heavyweight off your back. If he can show that kind of strong BJJ and heavy hands against Marcus, it's safe to say he can do well in the heavyweight division.
All in all, a mostly dumb season with far too much pointless bickering between Rampage and Rashad, but still looking forward to Saturday.
Barc Says:
Sucks to see big Marcus go; but, Bendan's alright. Suprise, suprise... Kimbo on the finale card? I am actually damn stoked for this finale. Should be pretty decent.
ReX13 Says:
@ Defender & Mybong:
Agreed. I don't see any of these guys making a dent in the top 5 of either weight class any time soon.
@Face7biter: Is there a petition i can sign to start a cruiserweight 206-230 lb class?
Payday Says:
I was so happy McSweeny got smashed. What a fuckstick.
mybongsnameisgr... Says:
@ face7biter
thanks for pointing out that roy does manage his cardio well, he's fat and knows it, thats why he may be boring to watch, he goes in, gets shit done, and out.
thats the point of the sport, to win, and not get hurt. ESPECIALLY on this show, because if you go into overtime, get cut bad and still win, its just like losing if you arent cleared to fight in a few days.
@ rex13
i'd rather them pick a different name for that class if it ever comes to fruition, something like fedorweight would be cool
J-Dog Says:
@mybongsnameisgr: How about call 206-230 lb class heavyweight and call the 230+ class super heavyweight? Duh!
ReX13 Says:
@ J-Dog
Currently, Super Heavy is anything above 265. Although, i guess if you're going to try to rearrange the weight classes again, no reason not to rename 'em while you're at it.
mthomas Says:
Man, that poetry was AWFUL!! I actually laughed out loud listening to that shit. "Keep your focus/This ain't hocus-pocus" REALLY?? Wow!
Also, how fucking annoying are the staredowns between Rampage and Rashad? We know they aren't gonna fight at this point, and so did everyone associated with the show. They couldn't edit the last episode a bit so that we didn't have to sit through 2 scenes of this bullshit?
This is the first season of TUF I've watched all the way through and I gotta say, I'm not a big fan. The fights were terrible for the most part and the banter between cast members was boring and stupid. The concept is starting to get really old. Here's hoping that they shake things up with the format for season 11.
Oh, and I knida hope Big Country wins the whole thing. You just know it would absolutely KILL Dana to have to award the contract to someone who looks like Roy does, regardless of his fighting ability.
The Truth Says:
DW said he liked Roys fight(which was the same shit) so he could grease up for all the hype coming this week.
Man, If Jones could get some boxing skills, and/or a chin....he could be great.
AquaVelva Says:
McSweeny turned out to be such a tool that I was actually rooting for Mitrione.
Endocat Says:
Hopefully Demico Rogers goes the gerald harris route. He should find a stable camp, get with a decent striking coach and he could be something.
The Truth Says:
Brock Lesnar...you know your good when they try changing the weight class rules because of you.
They should let the light heavyweights go up to 215-220. Now sit back and think of all the cool matchups.
Mir vs the Spider
and ????
The Truth Says:
Roy Nelson is a super veteran. He is never going to get any better than he is now. All the rest have plenty of room to improve. Id make his first UFC fight against Kongo after the doctors reattach his arm on the 13th.
BTW, did anyone see what the parlay is for Mir/Florian pays? 6/5 !! Is that a gift, or what?
I would have like to see Roy Nelson vs The Darkness, and Mcweeny Vs Matt. Those would have been more entertaining.
The Truth Says:
Mcsweeny VS Brendan**
mthomas Says:
“When you are in the room getting your hands wrapped up tight, you are ready for this big ass fight. You feel much lighter. Are you ready to be The Ultimate Fighter? Keep your focus. This ain’t hocus pocus.”
Anyone else miss Stankie when they hear shit like this?
munche Says:
It's funny that after just about every TUF episode a bunch of people start naming the top 5 in the division and saying these guys couldn't beat them. Of course not! They're up and comers!
Did Diego Sanchez or Kenny Florian look like title contenders on the show? How about Rashad? Jardine? Forrest Griffin?
These guys are a few years away from even considering the top 5 in the division, just like EVERY TUF SEASON EVER
munche Says:
also re: splitting up the Heavyweights...it's been gone over a million times over, but basically you just destroy the division. If you had a 230 or 235 or whatever class, who would be up at 265? Like 4 guys currently in the UFC. You want to watch those same 4 guys keep fighting each other?
Brock isn't invincible folks. We don't need to create a new weight division so he stops fighting guys.
Defender Says:
@ Munche - I see what you mean. And you're certainly right. They have a long road to a title fight...but I don't even see the guys from TUF able to start down that road.
Overall it seems like a majority could drop to 205 and add some fresh talent to that stagnant pool. Brendan is a contender and I could see him in a fight with Lyoto. It just seems that even when I start at the bottom of the HW roster, unless your name is Mustafa Al Turk...you are going to get a free win from any one of these guys.
I can say with much honesty that I absolutely saw a champion in Forrest when he was fighting the finale.
Maybe I should look up some of Nelson's IFL fights...because as it stands now he just looks like a guy who is scared to get hurt and wont take a risk. I don't mean pulling a McSweeney and putting his fucking chin out...I mean actually trying to set up a counter or fake.
I mean, isn't that what Gray Mannard does? Look for the easy way out...which results in a boring fight?
ReX13 Says:
@ Munche
Disagree with "destroy the division" argument.
First, one of the best points for another division would be another belt, with the attendent challengers and storylines. Especially now, with multiple champs on the shelf, the UFC could use some extra headliners for cards.
Second, i challenge the idea that there are only 4 guys currently in the UFC north of 230.
Third, i'd think that if there were a super heavy class, it would fill up fairly quickly. There are plenty of athletic guys walking around over 250 who would love to be cagefighters. There would be a void to begin with, but i doubt it would stay empty for long.
(Incidentally, why not go ahead and fold in the WEC while you're at it. Then have a TUF season of Flyweights and Super Heavys. Hilarity would ensue for shizzle.)
Fourth, DO agree with "Brock isn't invincible." I don't see him defending that belt more than a couple more times.
***
Let's be honest, the main reason the UFC poo poo'd the last suggestion for re-alignment of weight classes was that maintaining all those contracts gets expensive. And we all know that DW wants his best fighters exclusive...
Koeikan Says:
So... wtf did Kimbo do this season that impressed Dana and the Ferttitas to warrant a spot on the finale?
Defender Says:
@ - Koeikan
Ratings. If 6 million people tuned him to watch him fight on TV...if half buy a PvP to watch him fight again...
Cha-Ching
He's a guaranteed draw at least once on a PvP, which if he beats Houston this weekend, should be first quarter 2010.
Defender Says:
@ - Koeikan
I guess what HE actually did was showed up. Outside of that...I don't really know?
Bloodlust Says:
Trevor Wittman's rhymes were reminiscent of Wordsworth from the old Heathcliff cartoon. Of course though, this begs the question: Is Rashad Riff Raff?
And where's Cleo? She was a hottie!
831 Son Says:
The whole making a new weight class thing is dumb. The way it is right now is perfect. If anything the UFC just needs to bring in Bantam-weights and Featherweights and whatnot. Making a whole separate division of 206- 230's and 231- 265 is just ridiculous.
BarryBadrinath Says:
What needs to happen is get a mathmetical genuis in to make an mma point system. Cause the shit is wack right now. To many bad decisions. More important than weight classes i would think.
WuTangClan Says:
That link "open field", you Bens are faggots.
ReX13 Says:
WuTangClan Says:
Thu, 12/03/2009 - 16:09
That link "open field", you Bens are faggots.
Yeah, that's only one of the most famous works of art in the world. They have teh ghey.
Sabado Gigante Says:
I think tackling Barry Sanders in the open field in Tecmo Bowl is a pretty bad ass accomplishment!
Turd Furgeson Says:
I don't even watch TUF anymore. I haven't since the third season. And the only reason I'm gonna watch the finale is to see bones beat the deaf outta hammell.
UFC fan Says:
"WuTangClan Says:
Thu, 12/03/2009 - 14:09
That link "open field", you Bens are faggots."
You are so goddamn stupid and uneducated it hurts to even see you type. I would love to see you get banned for calling the Ben's fags, but they never do anything so you are safe , but what a christmas present that would be to see you shoot off your goofy fucking know nothing gayass mouth and have it blow up on you........and take 831 fag with ya while you are at it.
831 Son Says:
Aw the worthless troll is mad again. How sad.
UFC fan Says:
glad to see you acknowledge your name.