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‘TUF 10′ Episode 3 Recap: My Own Worst Innerme

(Kimbo vs. Roy, round 1+2.)

After all the hype, after all the brilliant video analysis, it finally happened: A fight that could have potentially headlined an EliteXC card, going down in front of about 30 people on a reality TV show set. Kimbo Slice vs. Roy Nelson. The Irresistable Force vs. The Immovable Fat Dude. No, you won’t see it on any Fight of the Year lists, but it happened. You can’t deny that it was something that happened.

Apparently, living in a house with no televisions or computers has the same effect as smoking an assload of weed, because Kimbo began last night’s episode in a reflective, philosophical mood, getting right with God and dropping pearls of wisdom like: "When I decide to shave the beard is when ‘Kimbo’ will be put to rest…but will Kimbo ever be at rest?" He realizes that he’s always operated in relation to an exterior enemy, but hold the fuck up because maybe this whole time the enemy is the eneME, or rather, the INNER ME? Has Kimbo been fighting himself his whole life? Oh my God, player.

Kimbo says he doesn’t have a chip on his shoulder, or anything to prove; he’s just a family man who likes to fight. Maybe Slice fights for little Kevlar and Kevina, but Roy only seems to fight for himself. He’s a lone wolf, an island. He books his own fights, secures his own sponsorships, and acts as his own trainer. Luckily, Rashad Evans feels like he’s finally cracking that doughy exterior and earning Big Country’s trust.

So, Keith Jardine shows up to practice, and Rashad starts crowing about how Rampage’s jaw will start hurting again when he sees KJ. Rampage greets Keith and pwns him with the old "got something on your shirt, homey" trick. But he doesn’t like Rashad’s implication that the condition of his jaw would be affected by Keith’s presence. They fight about it. Eventually, Rampage falls back into reliable bad breath jokes, and diverts his hostility to James McSweeney — "Speak American!…take Rashad’s nuts out your mouth and then talk to me" — and McSweeney nearly has another meltdown.

Rampage likes that Kimbo is humble and hungry to learn, but he’s nervous about how Kimbo will do if (when) he’s mounted, especially because there’s nobody on their team to replicate Roy’s big belly. ("I bet he ain’t seen his little friend in years," Rampage says.) They drill mount escapes for a while. Meanwhile, Roy and a few other members of Team Evans are chilling in the backyard, critiquing Kimbo’s skills. Roy predicts that he will end the fight after getting Kimbo in a crucifix position. Come on, man, don’t you think that’s a little too specific? I mean, anything can happen in a fight, right?

During a tough Team Rampage conditioning session, Marcus Jones hobbles off the mats with an aching knee. And yet, he becomes butthurt when it’s suggested that he won’t be fighting next. Rampage tries to explain that he should wait until his knee is feeling better, but Baby Marcus won’t be reasoned with. Rampage asks him if he’s on his period, which seems like a legitimate question. Marcus is a strange, emotional dude, who admits that he’s a former D&D aficionado who enjoys gardening. When his teammates suggest he’s a sensitive person, he gets all sensitive about it.

Kimbo and Roy weigh in. At 264 pounds, Roy has a 34-pound gut advantage over Kimbo. Roy wants to keep the fight standing — unless he starts getting beat up. "I’m not that dumb," he says. Kimbo explains that an "Ultimate Fighter" is a mixed martial artist who’s also a fighter. Anyway, it’s dyin’ time

Round 1: They start slow, jabbing and feeling each other out. Roy comes forward and lands the first clean punch. Kimbo lands a leg kick. Roy throws some arcing left hooks. Finally, Slice wakes up and starts chasing Roy, slugging. Roy clinches and spends a couple minutes with Kimbo against the fence, trying to pull him down. Finally, he succeeds. Roy quickly gets the mount, but Kimbo does a decent job of controlling his posture. Roy switches to side control and Kimbo is nearly able to buck him off, but Roy stays on top and ties Kimbo up in a crucifix from the top, trapping one of Kimbo’s arms with his legs. Roy starts punching Kimbo in the top of the head, and Kimbo can’t do anything to defend the shots. With twenty seconds left in the round, Herb Dean starts imploring Kimbo to fight back. Kimbo doesn’t even wiggle his toes; he’s stuck in the crucifix, waiting for the bell. Roy continues punching Kimbo in the head. Frustrated, Roy shouts "come on, man!" to Herb. Finally, Kimbo is saved by the bell. Total gift from the referee. Not that Roy’s punches were doing a lot of damage, but Kimbo wasn’t doing jack shit to defend himself. It’s the James Thompson fight, all over again.

Round 2: Kimbo catches Roy with a hard 1-2, then another punch, but he makes the mistake of throwing an off-balance knee and Roy seizes the opportunity, clinching and taking Kimbo down again. Roy moves to side control and tries to isolate Kimbo’s arm for a kimura. Kimbo slips out, so Roy puts Kimbo in the crucifix position again. Roy begins hammering Kimbo’s head, and still Kimbo can’t do anything about it. A crestfallen Herb Dean waves off the fight. Kimbo loses his first fight in the Octagon, and Team Rashad goes up 3-0. Roy walks over to Dana and asks for a double-whopper with cheese.

DW is not impressed: "I let my daugher pin me down and hit me. That’s the kind of shots he was hitting Kimbo with…this guy is acting like the whole world should be blown away by the performance he put on…he did just enough to win and not get hurt." Damn, dude, sounds like you had some money riding on this fight. No, it wasn’t a great battle or a thrilling stoppage, but Roy’s gameplan was smart, and his groundwork was flawless. How does Big Country not run through the rest of these scrubs?

But wait: In the scenes-from-the-next-episode montage, it appears that Kimbo could go back in as a replacement, most likely for Marcus Jones. Could Kimbo really have his second fight before half of his teammates have their first one? And was his performance impressive enough to warrant a second chance? (Kimbo got tooled, but I guess he didn’t do worse than Abe Wagner and Wes Shivers.) And who’s this traitor on Team Rashad?

Cagepotato Comments

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Casa de los pantelones- October 1, 2009 at 8:42 pm
Hmm, why would Kimbo get another immediate fight in replacement of someone, when there are still others left in the house who havent fought yet?

Riddle me that batman.
Merlin- October 1, 2009 at 5:10 pm
I think Dana needs to be careful because his shiny head is starting to think more about money than integrity.
For all his talks on the importance of honest promoting & his disgust of smaller promotions using amateur fighters (like Kimbo) to promote main events. He's sure coming across a little hypocritical, at best he could have said "I told you so" after the fight and srugged his shoulders over a flat smile.
Instead he starts looking at the numbers & going ... humm now I see why they asked the "Pink One" to keep it standing.

Not Cool DANA Not COOL

Keep it real booyakasha !
mtsgt- October 1, 2009 at 10:34 am
I think the DW was just pissed that Big Country took out the pony from the dog and pony show. And for those of you that think Nelson is just a fat slob you need to watch fights between him and Arlovski and Imes, and watch the grappling tournament video where he schools Mir like 15 to 2. He did a good job at executing his game plan, and did what he had to do to win.
DiazBros209- October 1, 2009 at 10:31 am
Savanna White def. Dana White by R1 TKO
Roy Nelson def. Kimbo Slice by R2 TKO

Savanna White vs. Roy Nelson this December @ TUF10 Finale

I've got money on Savanna. Armbar from mount in Round 3.
portland mma- October 1, 2009 at 9:58 am
I completely agree with you on that Nate, I also thought it was an awesome idea for Rashad's team to count aloud every punch so Herb actually realized Kimbo just got hit 21 times without moving, regardless of how hard he got hit.
portland mma- October 1, 2009 at 9:54 am
I see what your saying, he didn't really make much of an attempt to do anything, he flailed his feet a few times but I think no matter what Kimbo is gonna have that problem especially with bigger guys, they need to put him with a guy who wants to stand up and bang with him, hell they should pay the guy money to just stand...oh wait.
Genki Sudo FTW- October 1, 2009 at 9:49 am
Big Countrys pussy punches whispered in Kimbo's ears "please dont shoot me in my sleep"
NateGetsIrate- October 1, 2009 at 9:42 am
Anybody that think that Roy should have been HAMMERING Kimbo's head has obviously never been in a fight. The harder you hit someone in the head, the greater chance you have of breaking your hand. And that was only Roy's first fight in a tournament-style contest.

If anything, Roy tapping Kimbo on the head instead of HAMMERING him just shows how little a threat Kimbo was to Roy in the first place.
ArmFarmer- October 1, 2009 at 9:02 am
Portland, I'm not saying it would have worked but it would be nice if he at least tried. Also I do believe that even with that belly on you, you can bridge enough to at least slightly shift the weight and pull your arm free so you aren't eating pitty pats for a minute straight. I know he was probably going to lose either way, but he just laid there flat on his back that's what I don't get.
portland mma- October 1, 2009 at 8:54 am
Armfarmer I see what you are saying about Kimbo's ground skills but its alot harder to bridge with a dude that weighs 35 more pounds then you then when a guy weighs the same in a wrestling match. I also don't agree with everyone who says there is no talent on the show, how do you know? They edit the show to show you what they want at that time, I think Shaub is gonna be a stud.
Bob Reilly- October 1, 2009 at 8:53 am
Dana is a Kimbo nut hugger. He needs to be impartial to make this crap legit.
UFC fan- October 1, 2009 at 8:46 am
Not only has no one on the show shown any skills whatsoever to win a match again a signed heavyweight in the UFC but if they think Roy "fatass" country stands a chance they are stupid. The reason Dana was mad wasn't cause he had money or on it, or he wanted Kimbo to win or none of that stupid shit you idiots said, he was mad cause big dumb fatass was tapping Kimbo's head instead of punching it HARD. I agree with Dana you want to impress, then get him in a crucifix and HAMMER that head, and elbow it, cut it up, do it with bad intentions, otherwise you come off as a pussy JUST like he did last night. And he really didn't want to hurt him, then why is he even fighting. This ain't the the ultimate crocheting championship!
Enricho Palazzo- October 1, 2009 at 8:33 am
"Intelligent Defense"

What is the point behind the "intelligent defense"? By Roy Nelson's definition, several unanswered, consecutive blows to the head -- regardless of their effectiveness -- constitutes a stoppage via the opponent not intelligently defending himself. I would think that the sole reason for a fight stoppage due to a fighter not intelligently defending himself would be because the fighter is receiving damaging blows that puts his health/safety at risk. That clearly wasn't the case with the hits Roy was putting on Kimbo.

Yes, a strong case can be made that Kimbo was putting up no intelligent defense while his nose seemed to be crammed up Roy's belly button, and for that reason alone the fight should've been stopped to save Kimbo's life. But let's pretend that didn't happen. Were those blows really enough to stop the fight, even if he did land about 20 in a row? What if those pats to the head were hitting Kimbo's ribs instead? I get that Kimbo was completely immobilized and outclassed on the ground, but I'd like to know exactly what the rulebook says on whether or not multiple pitty-pats to the face constitutes this sort of stoppage.
superflat- October 1, 2009 at 8:31 am
Anyone else intrigued by Nelson's background? Taught himself fighting, largely, manages his own career, even trains in his own home sometimes? Sounds to me like he may be one of those awesome, off-the-grid dudes who don't like no government and have a small forest's worth of animal carcasses curing in their basement.
ArmFarmer- October 1, 2009 at 8:31 am

Dude I don't agree with a word of what you just said. First off.. when did Dana ever promote kimbo as the next big thing? Find me one quote where Dana says anything close to that. I've been paying close attention to the hype just out of curiosity to see how they would tip toe around marketing kimbo yet not pulling an elite xc and they are doing a great job. The ads say things like "Kimbo, the worlds most famous STREETFIGHTER" or "the biggest fight in tuf history".. which is entirely true.. name one high profile fight that's ever been on the reality show. They never push kimbo as anything other than what he is.

Also, how is having kimbo on tuf bad for the sport in any way? Because he admits that he isn't the best fighter and never thought he was? Because he admits that he has huge holes in his game and he is trying to fix them? Because he gets outclassed by a true mm artist with well rounded skills? Bad for the sport would be kimbo coming in talking a lot of trash refusing to round out his skills and then koing a well rounded fighter. That's not the case.

I think people (kevin iole) are kind of glancing over what's happening and forming opinions without really thinking them through. If you really look at what's going on it all makes sense.
petro- October 1, 2009 at 8:25 am
I'm already getting tired of this season and its love affair with kimbo. I know UFC is trying to appeal to wider audiences but c'mon, that whole humble Kimbo on his road to becoming a MMA fighter is a bunch of BS marketing (just ask Rutten). Kimbo knows he's not worth shit as a fighter, as is just using the limelight to score publicity points so he can land fights in the UFC based on his bs personality and not on actual MMA skill.

ArmFarmer- October 1, 2009 at 8:21 am
I also don't get why Kimbo has been training as long as he has but can't plant his feet and bridge when he's on his back.. it's one of the very first things you learn in wrestling. If you can't grasp that then you will be pinned every time you hit the mat. It's really basic stuff and it's not at all complicated and at the very least he would have gotten his arm free. Would probably help if Rampage didn't suck donkey balls at coaching. Kimbo.. ditch page and find a mediocre highschool wrestler.. he will know what to do.
tallkitchenbags- October 1, 2009 at 8:15 am
shitbag speaks the truth. roy's got some game, but the rest of the cast are wannabes at best. i can't hate on kimbo, but i can hate the folks, including DW, who promoted him as the next big thing. talk about taking a quick buck over what's good for the sport. DW is a dick. Roy fought smart and did what he needed to in order to advance and minimize his chances of injury. his job is to win and he did that in a convincing, if unexciting fashion.
shitbag- October 1, 2009 at 8:04 am
Man, does anyone else think most, if not all of the cast, Roy is good but every single other guy, inlcuding Kimbo, isn't that good.

Who are they going to beat in the UFC's HW division? No one. Who is Kimbo going to beat in the UFC's HW division? Name one match up where he has a legitimate shot - he doesn't, and EVERY single other fighter on the show is at the same skill level as Kimbo or sucks even worse.
youngblood- October 1, 2009 at 8:02 am
Yes, it wasn't the explosive knockout fest we have come to expect from watching Ferg on the net. Yes, it wasn't an explosive fight at all. You do have to give it to Big C though, he did call it. The whole Babe Ruth thing, calling the shot, is exactly what he did. He even said pre-fight when they were sitting by the pool that the ref would have to stop the fight, no matter how hard the shots were, if Kimbo wasn't defending, which he wasn't. That is the rule. Big C could have submitted him several times, with multiple subs, but he proved his point. He said what he was going to do, and did it. He did not take any punishment, or risk injuring himself bouncing an elbow off of Kimbo's dome. I would like to see Kimbo fight again. He seems like he seriously wants to succeed, and realizes all the hype that was put on him previously was because people were trying to capitalize off of his name. He needs some ground work, and a decent coach. Would have been nice to see what Rashad and Jackson could do with him in about 6 months of serious training. Big C, I will buy you that Whopper, "no pickles"
Ritalin Boy- October 1, 2009 at 7:50 am
Let's face it: Brock would annihilate just about anyone there. (I don't like him but methinks he can now even clean Fedor's clock.)

And I haven't seen a UFC heavyweight 'physique' like Big Country's since Tim "bag o' milk" Sylvia.

Props to UFC for making Kimbo look more like Bambi.

"Kimbi" anyone?
portland mma- October 1, 2009 at 7:50 am
He'll come back for Marcus Jones and they'll hype another horrible fight.
mytie- October 1, 2009 at 7:47 am
Kimbo has been an MMA fighter for 2 years now and he still hasn’t trained Jiu-Jitsu? It is ridiculous that he is still talked about in the MMA world. I have respect for Nelson for not hurting someone with so little skills when he obviously could have.
Casa de los pantelones- October 1, 2009 at 7:46 am
omg, why does kimbo go limp hen he hits the ground? No bucking, no flailing, no trying to escape or use and explosive twist or turn to get free...I mean c'mon bro...jesus is dying again right now watching you go limp when you hit the floor homey.

Do something, let your instincts take over...kick your friggin legs in the air and buck his ass off like the pro wrestlers do before the three count! Yeah wrestling is fake, but the buck does really work, give it a shot mang!

My freakin' word!!! you are on the ground on your back.

raspberrymight- October 1, 2009 at 7:45 am
Nelson didnt look impressive, he was tagged a few times and in the second round looked a little dazed like Rashad said, but this isn't a big fight for Big Country, he did what he needed to do in order to get to the next round. Why should be risk a career in the ufc to try and knock out kimbo slice, only because he's a big name, and using that strategy might have got Nelson knocked out in the process. "Suga" wasnt overly impressive in is time on TUF but he's pulled out some highlight reel knockouts since.

which ever way it goes for kimbo and his probable return to fight, he'll get another fight at an actual ufc event beyond tuf, the monies to gd for DW to pass up