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TUF 12.6 Recap: Boom, It’s Gonna Be a Disaster

(The Stevens vs. McKenzie "fight," if you can call it that. Props: TheMMAResource)

Still giddy from his squad’s first victory, Josh Koscheck starts picking on Team GSP’s Michael Johnson, telling him he looks heavy, he gassed out in his fight against Aaron Wilkinson, and he would have lost if not for that beast-like surge at the end. Kos’s entire team is equally assholish, continuing their celebration into the night, screaming in the house like complete jackasses. Koscheck shows up with burgers and Johnson asks him why he has to be such a dick. Josh denies he’s a dick; he just loves yellow. You can’t really fault a man for that.

Koscheck also loves being in the power-position for the first time in the season. He finally has control of the matchups, and during a team discussion, the idea of Marc Stevens (his #1 pick) vs. Cody McKenzie (GSP’s #6 pick) is floated. They figure that as long as they stay away from Cody’s famous guillotine choke, it’s a good matchup for them. Since this is one of those two-fight episodes, we know that whatever happens, it’s not gonna last long.

Kos announces Stevens vs. McKenzie as his match selection, and the two lightweights face off for the first time. "You don’t have to puff your chest out like that," Stevens says to McKenzie. "Exhale…it’s not very friendly." Cody mean-mugs Stevens, but then grins and chin-checks Koscheck again before walking off, just like he did last episode. Koscheck has to be reminded that this should piss him off. "Cut his fingers off the next time he does that to you," Sako says. "We can’t even understand you," Cody deadpans to the Armenian. It’s personal now. Yellow doesn’t like Cody McKenzie, no sir.

GSP tells his team to rise above the Team Koscheck bullshit. He’s not a coward — he used to take on five guys at once when he was younger, no homo — but he doesn’t respond to trash talk, unless his well-being is "jeopratized," in which case, "boom, it’s gonna be a disaster."

Cody’s style is unorthodox and funky. He’s not an athletic guy, but he likes good times and he likes fighting. And his custom-guillotine is death; his 11-0 pro record includes nine wins by the technique, and he won his elimination fight on the show by putting Amir Killah to sleep with it. "I don’t give two shits about a decision to be honest," Cody says. "I’m here to finish him, I’m here to get paid…and that’s that."

Koscheck sets his attention on Mr. McKenzie. "I’d love to get my hands on you, it would be so nice," Kos says, like a hard-up boyfriend. "Could you fight at 170?"

"I’d fight wherever they pay me," Cody replies.

"Maybe I’ll come in for the wild card," Koscheck offers.

"Maybe, but then I’d have to lose first," Cody says. And then he walks off like a BAWSS. Koscheck appreciates the kid’s balls.

Marc Stevens got in the house with that quick knockout of TJ O’Brien. Dana White thinks Stevens will try to stand with McKenzie, because of Cody’s fearsome guillotine-rep. McKenzie admits that Stevens is better than him at everything…but he’s going to win anyway. He’s also the shit-stirrer that Team GSP needs; not everybody can turn the other cheek like St. Pierre. Stevens calls McKenzie ignorant, uneducated, a punk, an asshole. Cody says, "For how little he is, he sure walks tall."

Before the fight, Team Kos assistant coach Dave Camarillo warns Marc: "No lucky punches, no guillotines. Head stays away from your opponent in the clinch…He’s coming wild"

"He’s been sitting down in the back deck with his drawings and his crown royal and his chew," Marc says. "That’s not a fighter’s lifestyle. This is going to be a learning experience for him."

It’s time to bang. Cody refuses Marc’s offer to tap gloves at the beginning of the fight. Marc’s like "whatever." Cody rushes in with a sloppy punch right off the bell. He throws a high kick; Marc catches it, shoves Cody down to the mat…and falls directly into that freaking guillotine. Marc Stevens is out cold in 16 seconds. The yellow team is deathly silent. Kos applies lip balm, angrily. Basically, Stevens reverted back to wrestling when he was caught off guard by the gong-and-dash. That might have been the fastest abandonment of a game-plan in MMA history. Koscheck says it was "like a sick feeling, an ooey feeling" watching it go down. Stevens hopes he can come back in and win the whole thing. LOL bro, 16 seconds!

Team GSP goes up 4-1 and regains control of the matchups. They have good reason to rub Team Koscheck’s noses in it, but GSP doesn’t want bullies on his team. As he explains, they expect you to come at them aggressive. You have to be a nice guy and catch them off guard. Georges won’t respond when Kos fucks with him, but when they fight, well, he won’t be so nice.

"Wow," Nam Phan says, breaking the silence in the Yellow room. Only the Aremenians are left to avenge their honor.

GSP selects his #2 pick Jonathan Brookins to go against Team Koscheck’s #2 pick Sevak Magakian. "Nobody knows how good he is," Georges says about Brookins. "Not even Jonathan Brookins knows how good he is." GSP likes that Brookins is a sponge in the gym, and he has a philisophical mind that fits in perfectly with the St. Pierre/Danaher vibe. "You discover yourself through competition," Brookins says. "I want to do like the plants do and go up towards the sun."

"He’s gonna go hard, I’m gonna go hard, and I’m gonna be on his face," Sevak says. I really wish I hadn’t already blown my "no homo" quota for this recap.

Brookins and GSP clash heads while rolling, and Coach Georges gets gashed up over his eye. While GSP is looking for his sandals, which Koscheck has hidden like the child he is, Kos notices the cut and needles him about it. "Don’t worry, I’ll be fine in December," St. Pierre says. "I’m not gonna hit you there, I’m gonna hit you right here," Koscheck says, and chucks GSP’s chin, paying Cody’s insult forward.

Sevak and Sako Chivitchian have been training partners for eight years. Sako vouches for his buddy’s heart. Sevak moved to the States when he was a teenager, and fights for the memory of his father. In sparring, he just sticks his face out, collecting blows. But he’s an experienced grappler, and he’s strong.

Brookins explains that he doesn’t know if the universe wants him to win, but the universe allowed him to be here, which is pretty amazing considering all the possibilites of things that could have happened in his life, etc. Sevak is more succinct: "This is win or die, man." It’s time for fight #2…

Magakian throws an overhand right, then a head kick. Brookins lunges for a leg, then shoots in with a knee and takes Magakian down from a clinch. Brookins first works for an armlock, then takes Magakian’s back standing when the Armenian rolls and gets to his feet. Brookins has his legs sunk and hangs out in mid-air for a bit. After some jockeying for position, Brookins slips in the rear-naked choke and secures it. Magakian collapses to the mat and enters dreamworld. Another quick submission victory for Team GSP, who go up 5-1. Poor Sevak will not get his date with Bruce Leroy.

On the next episode: The final round-of-14 fight between Dane and Sako, the coaches’ challenge (home run derby!), and the wild card matchup is selected. Aaron Wilkinson seems like a shoe-in for one of the spots. Andy Main is the other front-runner at this point, unless the loser of Dane/Sako manages to lose more impressively. Though we’re still hoping that Koscheck keeps his word and enters the competition…

Cagepotato Comments

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DangadaDang- October 22, 2010 at 7:55 pm
Cody Mackenzie is officially my favorite fighter of all time. He is the Larry Bird of MMA, and should team up with Forrest Griffin to form the first Tag Team MMA league
darciesdaddy- October 22, 2010 at 4:31 pm
I will explode with happiness if I get to hear Cody say "Dont' be scared, homie." to Kos.
stopdrinkingpee- October 22, 2010 at 12:54 am
Agreed that this was an enjoyable episode. Can we stop, at least for a little while, urging that TUF be cancelled?

And it's shoo-in, not shoe-in. I'm not a huge grammar nerd, but that has got to get fucked up more than just anything else out there. SHOO-in. Wilkinson is the one Kos calls "English"? He definitely should get one of the wild cards. Can't imagine he wouldn't.
dranokills- October 21, 2010 at 11:22 pm
J_Swilly Says:
Thu, 10/21/2010 - 17:31

"Ok, so to recap stay away from the guillotine and what the Kcuf He's out cold already". That was freakin' hilarious! The we get "yeah I still think I'm one of the best guys in the house."

Uhm, hello!!! You lasted 16 seconds with a guy who really has nothing but a killer G-choke and you jumped right into it in like 4 or 5 seconds? Are you fighting for M1 Global by any chance?

Any possibilities he bet against himself and turfed the fight for monetary recompense? Any chance he got the same education from the same school as Mr. "I like yellow" (n.b. so does Machida, you two should meet up for a drink sometime).

Either way Kos and his flunky make for some great TV. Thanks for being such horrible douches and foolish fighters,.... you made my night!
I cant say it any better, but I would add that Dana White must love this season, he hates koscheck as much as the rest of normal people, and this must please him to see kos get embarrassed by GSP, and in december Kos is gonna get destroyed by GSP ...again.
I loved seeing savak get his ass whipped after that fake ass chicken shit act he pulled on leroy. I like Alex, and savak is like the rest of the titty baby's on kos team they can dish it, but they can't take it. I love that Bruce leroy got under savak's pantsy ass skin, like I enjoyed each yellow team mouth talk their collective shit, and get put down like a foaming rabid dog!
I hope Kos loses his mind cause cody is in his head. that scene where he chokes the fat black guy, I hope its cause everyone on GSP's team tells kos that cody would make kos his sleeping bitch.
DazedNConfused- October 21, 2010 at 4:51 pm
Mckenzie will probably only lose to Brookins. They're honestly the only impressive fighters in the whole season. I also love Cody's I don't give a shit, stoner style. I also liked the Armenians but their skill doesn't seem to be as high. It's a shame, I hope Spike still sets up Leroy vs. Savak, because I hate Leroy and his bullshit.
Gardeninja- October 21, 2010 at 2:39 pm
AKA= Always Kock Asshole
Jcrowe07- October 21, 2010 at 2:03 pm
Cody "The Guillotine Jesus" McKenzie... market it.
LET IT RAIN- October 21, 2010 at 12:28 pm
hahahaha. Cody cracks me the fuck up. From his prefight Nam interview to how he gives Kos shit back. Kid is bad. Took Stevens right out of his game plan by not touching gloves and rushing right at him. I'm just curious how many more times he can disguise/setup the McKenzietine. I hope he keeps it up.
MoTropolis- October 21, 2010 at 11:53 am
Im surprised nobody on team GSP or even GSP himself hasnt got in Koscheks ass about pulling unfunny pranks immediately after losing his first pick to a 16 second choke. Like "Maybe if you put the same effort into training your fighters as you do hiding my flip flops, you wouldnt be getting your top picks dropped." or "Its great to see you keep such an upbeat attitude and a big smile on your face after losing 4/5 fights, including your first pick."

I would be all over that in attempts to make him re-evaluate what his purpose on the show is. This isnt Punk'd and your no Ashton Kutchner.
mtcage- October 21, 2010 at 11:41 am
i hated kos in TUF 1. after many years of not paying much attention to him, i started to sort of like the guy purely cause he paid his dues got better, trained hard, and became a good all around fighter. i initially thought his trash talking for his upcoming GSP fight was great in the sense that it added some hype to the bout. BUT MAN...TUF12 has reminded me so clearly of how much of a douchebag this guy is and how much i can't stand him! I hope gsp ko's kos! There is nothing wrong with being cocky, in fact it can be sort of charismatic, but if you combine it with douchebaggery like koscheck does, it is annoying as F***!
Shatski- October 21, 2010 at 11:34 am
Haha. At the very least, he'll call you a dickhead.
Almost North- October 21, 2010 at 11:33 am
Maybe it is just the accent but I still ain't messin with his tots. Just in case.
Shatski- October 21, 2010 at 11:25 am
Overall, it was a great episode and extremely satisfying. After starting with Kos's douchery, then progressing to his number one getting choked in seconds, then his number two being next on the list, it was just enjoyable. Just desserts. I would figure Spencer Paige for the wildcard if he didn't fuck his hand and foot up. I have no idea who they'll go with, but at least it's not almost by default this season like the injury plagued cast last time.

@Almost North/KarmaAte MyCat, Michael Johnson sounds like an average Missouri boy. I know a lot of dudes that talk like him and I'm from the other side of the state. That chilled out, nasally sound is common here and there. The drawl is all Missouri, though.

I like how Stevens said how Cody doesn't follow the fighter lifestyle with his drinking and chew. He must not have met Skarbowsky in passing, then. Jean Charles needs to take Cody under his wing and show him some striking to go with his guillotine. It'll be a hard drinking version of the Mr. Miyagi and Daniel Russo team.

@rih61. Nice Fraggle reference.
Koeikan- October 21, 2010 at 11:18 am
Like everyone else, I also loved this episode.

I've been rooting for Cody since the beginning... He's a local guy (WA) and he trains in the same camp as fancy pants.

I usually don't like it when a fighter on tough talks smack to the coaches, but he's so low key about it :)... plus it's Koschek.

Also, can we start referring to it McKenzietine officially? If that had been a normal guillotine, Stevens would have been fine when he jumped to side control on the far side, but Cody's very good at cutting off the carotid artery on both sides (yes, a la Marcelos, but different grip).
thenutman69321- October 21, 2010 at 11:10 am
Haha it was so great to see Kos's #1 pick look like a fool.

I hate the entire yellow team so much, they're all mini Kos's and they need to take his dick out of their mouths.
Dr.- October 21, 2010 at 10:47 am
Yeah, I lost a lot of respect for Camarillo. I know you have to back up your boy and I know editing can affect the context, but he looked like a cunt.

Yeah, yellow team are fucks. Koscheck is a closet fag and going to get his ass handed to himself AGAIN.

I like how he said that either Cody has big balls or he's just dumb. Were you talking about yourself? I vote dumb for Koscheck.

It also says a lot about the fighters that train at AKA with Cockcheck.
tmanifold- October 21, 2010 at 10:38 am
I will repeat the call for a Cagepotato ban on claim a fighter has "never fought anyone like me". Dude, you are a 12-5 wrestler puncher. He has probably faced a lot of guys like you. Next we are going to here KOS say that GSP has never faced anyone like.
KarmaAteMyCat- October 21, 2010 at 10:29 am
I Wan't a picture of Ksos's face when they zoom in after Marc gets choked out for my collection it's just so damn priceless it'll go well with my collection of 45k+ Pictures.
RearNakedSpoon- October 21, 2010 at 10:18 am
Just had to watch that moment again and saw in the locker room with GSP giving his talk about not acting like an a-hole, Skarbowsky was sitting in the background rocking a necklace that Mr T. would find over the top.

This episode had everything.
KarmaAteMyCat- October 21, 2010 at 10:17 am
RearNakedSpoon- October 21, 2010 at 10:09 am
"Kos applies lip balm, angrily" maybe he had to find something to do with them before he said something stupid again.
I'm still grinning and laughing, it was just a beautiful moment.

Also did anyone else notice GSP's face when Chandella came near him before the 2nd fight? He looked more scared then his first fight with Hughes!
BryanF- October 21, 2010 at 9:59 am

"Kos applies lip balm, angrily."
KarmaAteMyCat- October 21, 2010 at 9:57 am
His voice is not what I had expected. I was expecting something out of a 36mafia song or something but nope.
Almost North- October 21, 2010 at 9:54 am
Michael Johnson is the black napoleon dynamite. Dude is just awkward when he talks.
KarmaAteMyCat- October 21, 2010 at 9:51 am
That commercial is awesome in so many ways. Those kids aren't creepy. Don't be Scared homie.