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Twitter Contest: MMA Fighters in Only Three Words [UPDATED]


(Too. Damn. Talented.)

By: Jason Moles

*** The winners are now at the end of the post. Thanks to everybody who entered! ***

I’m sure there are more important things to talk about just days away from Jones-Henderson Jones-Sonnen Jones-Machida Jones-Belfort than another gimmicky post attempting to be relevant, but it’s been a while since we gave away CagePotato T-Shirts and we love you guys so much that we’ve decided to do it again. Here’s how it’s going to go down. Below is a list of 25 fighters and a brave attempt to describe them in three words. Not two, not four, just three simple words. Pretty easy, right? Read through them, then tweet us @CagePotatoMMA with your own three-word MMA fighter descriptions, including the hashtag #MMAFighterIn3Words. The three best submissions by tomorrow at 5 p.m. ET will win a shirt. (We’ll update this post with the winners after we select them.) Now let’s begin, shall we?

Quinton “Rampage” Jackson: Exit stage left.

Alexander “The Mauler” Gustafsson: Seeking next level.

Jon “Bones” Jones: If Healthy, Undefeated.*

Diego “The Dream” Sanchez: Starting over again.

Leonard Garcia: God help him.

Matt Hughes: Slayer of beasts.

Nate Diaz: Championship is possible.

Nick Diaz: Public relations nightmare.

Anderson “The Spider” Silva: Greatest fighter ever.

Chael Sonnen: Milking his schtick.

Brian Stann: Tough but limited.

“Big Country” Roy Nelson: Needs Mike Dolce.

Rich “Ace” Franklin: Lifetime company man.

“The Axe Murderer” Wanderlei Silva: Should retire soon.

Benson “Smooth” Henderson: Still question power.

Clay “The Carpenter” Guida: Seemingly no plan.

Shane Carwin: Age now issue.

Frank Mir: Another convenient injury.

Forrest Griffin: Chin erosion continues

Josh Koscheck: Still a d*ck.

Michael “The Count” Bisping: Continually underrated talent

“The American Psycho” Stephan Bonnar: Don’t count out.

“The Natural Born Killer” Carlos Condit: Don’t count on.

Pat “HD” Barry: Next stop, Strikeforce.

Georges “Rush” St.Pierre: Per for mance.

* I will never concede that Matt Hamill “won” that fight. That was a garbage-ass call.

And now, the winners…

@Adam_Skylark: Josh Koscheck – Styled By Sheep

@JaredKoll: Quinton Jackson: A mint, Rashad?

@Jtvision: Jon Jones: Annnnd it’s cancelled.

Cagepotato Comments

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BaghdadBob- September 22, 2012 at 7:21 am
CagePotato: Sometimes really ghey
hfghsdsd- September 21, 2012 at 7:11 pm
Wonderful.
share a website with you,

-- http://mcaf.ee/q1i0h --

Believe you will love it
RwilsonR- September 20, 2012 at 9:09 pm
Twitter: Self obsessed douchebags
RwilsonR- September 20, 2012 at 9:08 pm
Karo,Parisyan: Know me, bro?
RwilsonR- September 20, 2012 at 9:05 pm
Ronda Rousey: Small pond shark
RwilsonR- September 20, 2012 at 7:13 pm
Rousimar Palhares: "F***, my leg!!!"
RwilsonR- September 20, 2012 at 7:11 pm
Cody McKenzie: One Trick Pony
itsgalf- September 20, 2012 at 6:02 pm
Jon Jones: forgive and forget
remeadial- September 20, 2012 at 2:22 pm
Matt Hughes: Endangered Animal Meat
Renzo Gracie: Assume No Weapon
Alistair Overeem: Horsemeat Hamburger Helper
Nick Diaz: Always Shows Up
Buster Hyman- September 20, 2012 at 1:54 pm
hermes franca: rape rape jail

joe son: rape rape jail

rampage: rape rape paid


see? your contest would've gotten me fired from the UFC
Mr_Misanthropy- September 20, 2012 at 1:40 pm
Seen on Dana White's twitter:

@#CagePotatoContest: Loretta Hunt: Dumb Fucking Whore
Mr_Misanthropy- September 20, 2012 at 1:37 pm
Roy Nelson: Giant Dwarf Gravy
Jon Jones: Pooky Mamba Jamb
Arianny Lopez: Seven Layers Deep
Ronda Rousey: Smashed Out DW
Cybork: Chick With Dick
Dana White: Go Fuck Yourself
holeeball- September 20, 2012 at 1:36 pm
Carlos Condit: Natural Born Marathoner
holeeball- September 20, 2012 at 1:33 pm
Chael Sonnen: Too much T

Jon "" Jones: get some fans
holeeball- September 20, 2012 at 1:32 pm
Twitter account: Don't have one.
Mr_Misanthropy- September 20, 2012 at 1:38 pm
I'm Mr. Misanthropy and I approve this message. Me no Spacebook or Myface either.
blackboxmma- September 20, 2012 at 12:02 pm
GSP-loves the cock
Ouch That hurts- September 20, 2012 at 9:30 am
Gina Carano: Playboy Pictorial Forthcoming
Barnaby Jones- September 20, 2012 at 9:29 am
BJ Penn: Cabbage Patch Doll (When in shape, replace with "Grim Gyr Falcon". See: Fight against Shawn Sherk)

Matt Hughes: Charming Chipmunk Champion (Those teeth...)

Randy Couture: Against All Odds

Gabriel Gonzaga: King Kong Motherf*cker (Denzel quote)

Tim Sylvia: Fat Train Wreck (Can't help but watch.. and it jiggles!)

Anderson Silva: Well Oiled Machine (Cliche, but he's simply the best... around.)

Uriah Fabie Baby the California Kid: Little Big Head (Those bobble heads were so accurate)

Wandy: Scar Tissue Issues (Could have made a new person from all that tissue they removed)

Forrest Griffin: Run Forrest, Run!

Jon Jones: DUI. (lol)

Chael Sonnen: Why not Chael? (Zoidberg motherfucker. Props. This guy plays the game right.)

Frank Mir: Fantastic Motorcycle Driver
abenormal- September 20, 2012 at 9:03 am
LOL at Michael “The Count” Bisping: Continually UNderrated Talent
J.Jones- September 20, 2012 at 8:59 am
Tater Williams: Future heavyweight GOAT
or
Tater Williams: Across the sneeze
or
Tater Williams: TATER FREAKING WILLIAMS
Alan K- September 20, 2012 at 8:53 am
Entries for this contest: Comments should count.
holeeball- September 20, 2012 at 8:51 am
CP TEE: Want one now.
Knacker- September 20, 2012 at 8:00 am
bob sapp - Waste of Time
bob sapp - Taps Out Easily
bob sapp - Die Horrible Death
bob sapp - Embarrassment to MMA
bob sapp - Punch him repeatedly
Qlay- September 20, 2012 at 7:39 am
Nick Diaz: Homie scared? No.
amsterdamheavy- September 20, 2012 at 7:39 am
Cage Potato: Jumped the shark
CagePotatoMMA