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UFC 100 Scene Report: Expo Antics, Party Madness, and a Very Rare Photo Op

(‘Anyone here order a nice, cool glass of sexy?’)

Let me begin this installment of the UFC scene report with a message for that twelve-year-old kid who thrashed me at UFC Undisputed during yesterday’s Fan Expo: You got lucky.  Lucky that the game designers gave Wanderlei Silva a flash chin and “Rampage” Jackson a ridiculously powerful left hook.  Lucky that you don’t have a job and you get to sit around playing video games all day.  Lucky that I’m too nice a guy to slap a kid in the mouth for gloating after his one-punch KO victory.  

Now that that’s taken care of, let’s move on.

I’ve been to one or two UFC’s in Las Vegas by this point, Potato Nation, but I’ve never seen it like this.  The Fan Expo was a massive throng of humanity, and not just the kind of typical MMA fan humanity that you might expect.  Sure, I did see an infant with a Chuck-hawk, but I also saw a woman in her fifties get really excited when Shane Carwin showed up at the Warrior Wear booth.  I also watched two teenage girls trying earnestly to figure out whether Paulo Thiago was someone they should try to get their picture taken with, before ultimately deciding to take a photo with a cardboard cut-out of Brock Lesnar instead.

(Who loves reading?!)

For reasons totally unrelated to these girls, I spent most of my time at the Fight Magazine booth watching “Mayhem” Miller do his I’m-clinically-insane routine for the delight of the crowd.  At one point he insisted that everyone gather ’round and try to take pictures of him mid-air while he jumped up and down for no real reason.  No one enjoyed it more than he did.  The thing about “Mayhem” is, it’s not an act.  He really is like that all the time, which just seems exhausting.  

(The t-shirts are reasonably priced, but the actual American flag shorts that Don Frye wore against Gilbert Yvel, still unwashed?  That’s going to cost you.)

Wandering around the expo, I came upon this booth devoted to all things Pride.  I guess enough time has passed between the UFC’s purchase and subsequent destruction of the Japanese MMA org that they can now begin profiting off our nostalgia for it.  Even though I realized what they were up to, I can’t lie and say that I didn’t come very close to buying a Pride t-shirt.  But then it would have been super embarrassing if I showed up to the weigh-in and Lorenzo Fertitta and I were wearing the same thing.

Watch Ben Fowlkes From CagePotato Gives Us The Inside Scoop Of UFC 100 on

After the packed weigh-in, I did a little video blogging for Raw Vegas about the subtle differences between the Motel 6 and the Excalibur (short version: they’re both pretty shitty).  Then it was off to The Orleans to watch the all-female Tuff Girls MMA event, where Cage Potato reader Paige Zio completely annihilated her opponent.  Seriously, people?  Paige ain’t playin’.  She came out guns blazing with head kicks and vicious combos, battering her opponent until she, shall we say, chose not to continue midway through the second round.  Since she appeared to be on an express train to Unconscioustown, you couldn’t really blame her.

(Just as I was taking this picture, Donovan McNabb walked by behind me wearing a "Rampage" Jackson t-shirt.  But I just had to get that shot of Gray Maynard, didn’t I?)

Finally, I ended my night at the Cage Potato/Fight Magazine party at Tryst.  I’m not really a nightclub kind of guy, but even I have to appreciate a place built around a waterfall, just like I have to appreciate the bikini-clad go-go dancer who, if I’m not mistaken, paused to snort something during her routine.  The girl barely missed a beat.  However, my appreciation for the poshness of the place began to diminish right around the time I paid ten bucks for a Corona.  But just when you start to complain about something in life, you see someone who has it worse.

(Expertly cultivating the I-have-no-problem-hitting-you-with-this-cast look.)

Urijah Faber was just one of many MMA celebrities in attendance last night, and while I get just as excited as anyone to see my favorite fighters partying it up, the biggest thrill for me was snagging this rare photo opportunity.

(Yeah, Joe Silva is totally wearing a Richard Dawkins Foundation t-shirt. So no, he probably doesn’t want to come to church with you.)

Things I learned while talking to matchmaker extraordinaire Joe Silva: 1) he’s very amused by the aura of mystery Dana White has cultivated about him, 2) he takes a lot of pride in creating match-ups that jerks like me get excited about, and 3) he’s just as pumped up to watch Jon Jones fight as we are.

After a long day of UFC-related activities, I decided to pack it in and get some rest for the big show tonight.  Don’t forget to check out our liveblog tonight, and come back tomorrow for fight recaps, pithy observations, and jokes about Brock Lesnar’s tattoo.  Obviously, you don’t want to miss that.  While you wait, enjoy some more photos from last night’s party.  I’ll just be over here with my hangover.

(KenFlo. Also pictured: Kelly Crigger’s awesome t-shirt homage to Team America.)

(Dammit Marcus, I am in no mood to stand and bang right now.)

(You know who’s impressed when you tell them that you wrote this cover story?  Nobody.)

Cagepotato Comments

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Paige- July 12, 2009 at 9:56 pm
Thanks for the shout out Ben! And for the ring side visit post fight :)
I made it over to Tryst but it was pretty late in the night by the time I got there. I hadn't had anything to drink in quite a it was a fun (and long) nigh
EastClintwood- July 11, 2009 at 6:19 pm
You obviously haven't read his books or watched his DVD's...
Biffmiester- July 11, 2009 at 4:50 pm
Good job B-man; enjoy the show as i will... and potatohead dudes, i think you're mistaken dawkins with dawson.
Daddy_jeffy- July 11, 2009 at 4:37 pm
@ Purple Pickle
Nicely done. I didn't like the running man either.
Jay Smith- July 11, 2009 at 3:21 pm
This is my first time ever seeing you BF................. you're ugly. Great fuckin site though.
Kellenavalanche- July 11, 2009 at 3:02 pm
Nice post, funny shit. But dude, You gotta undo that top button or wear a tie. C'mon!
Horror Fighter- July 11, 2009 at 3:01 pm
OK, anybody take Hookers and Pizza as a user name yet?

I find it hard to believe that the girls in the ripped Fight shirts weren't impressed that you wrote the cover story. I expected to see them in bed with you. "Come back to the Excalibur, and I'll unsheathe my sword." Score.

P.S. That's what you get for questioning Marcus' Irish heritage.

(Oh, as a Cage Potato reader about to turn 40, I was sorry to hear I'm not in the target demographic. Is there an MMA site that caters exclusively to old bastards? Please send me the answer via telegram, as these new "tweat" technologies scare me. Thanks, son.)
dillweed- July 11, 2009 at 2:41 pm
The thing about Dawkins is he shows up at a gunfight with a knife - the debate over diety is a philosophical one, not a scientific one.
Meohfumado- July 11, 2009 at 2:24 pm
Dawkins likes sex with least that's what I saw in a documentary or something....

Or was that southpark?
PurplePickle- July 11, 2009 at 2:17 pm
Dawkins was ok in Hogan's Heroes. Never was much of a Family Feud fan though.....
tallkitchenbags- July 11, 2009 at 2:08 pm
reason lives. there is hope for potato nation!!!
any other Richard Dawkins fans in the house?
anyone know who richard dawkins is? jackson? jackson?
tallkitchenbags- July 11, 2009 at 2:04 pm
Richard Dawkins is the man!!!!!!
knightrida- July 11, 2009 at 1:54 pm
Look at BF with his shirt all tucked in. Woooooow...

rokabee- July 11, 2009 at 1:45 pm
Hookers and Pizza lol. Jus Another Day of Ben Livin' the Dream!
PurplePickle- July 11, 2009 at 1:08 pm
It's nice to see you and Trigg decided to dress for the occasion. See many Tim Sylvia Affliction hoodies at the club?
Walrus- July 11, 2009 at 1:00 pm
Beerpong in the lobby. Fuck yeah.

That being said, I liked the Luxor more.
shartacus- July 11, 2009 at 1:00 pm
Dude, I am truly envious of your life right now
the glza- July 11, 2009 at 12:59 pm
the pitbull smells my finger
BeastUnleashed- July 11, 2009 at 12:49 pm
Ya, keep it gangsta. ben
dbiggles- July 11, 2009 at 12:31 pm
Fuck yea man
Wads- July 11, 2009 at 12:29 pm
I had to create an account just to say that the Marcus Davis caption is the funniest thing I have read in at least 4 days.
Kimbos Bread- July 11, 2009 at 12:29 pm
Another Joe Silva pic?

Increased sightings were a sign of the "end of days" were they not?