Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?

UFC 121 Aftermath, Part One: Ding Dong, The Witch is Dead

(Valhalla was not quite what Lesnar had been expecting. There were fewer sexy valkyries and more big Mexicans angry about that shit he said. PicProps:

So, Cain Velasquez came as advertised at UFC 121. Brock Lesnar? Not quite so much. When Lesnar’s early Caveman Smash offense failed and he couldn’t keep Velasquez on the mat with his vaunted wrestling prowess, shit got ugly in a hurry. Of all the things the newly minted UFC heavyweight champion did well on Saturday night – face-punching being the most obvious – the most important and impressive may have been his ability to scramble back to his feet. As it turns out (and as some of you already suspected) the only thing Velasquez had to do to win this fight was keep it vertical, size and strength be damned. 

Clearly, Lesnar’s standup game is still a disaster of the approximate size and scope of the Hindenburg and the cracks that emerged in his repertoire during his previous fight with Shane Carwin busted wide open against Velasquez. He lashed out with some knees and good straight punches early, but they didn’t seem to faze the undefeated AKA product. As soon as Cain marshaled the troops and went on the offensive it was clear Lesnar had no plan B. And lo, there was much rejoicing and celebration. The Dark Lord hath fallen.

The most pressing question now may be what unforeseen calamity will befall Velasquez? Motorcycle wreck? Lengthy contract dispute? Hole in his colon? The only thing we’ve been able to conclusively prove about the UFC heavyweight title over the years is that winning it is typically not good for your health. As for Lesnar? Well, it’s funny how you can go from ruling the roost to looking like a chump in just under five minutes. Now even The Undertaker wants a piece. That video is after the jump.

Though it may be physically impossible to knock Lesnar out cold – the area that would traditionally house his neck is surrounded by a mountain of muscle that may not yet have a scientific name – in a practical sense, his chin may not be the greatest, either. In fact, the more we see of him in the cage, the more he looks like the classic bully. Lesnar loves to be on top of people (No, we don’t mean his wife. This time.) terrorizing them with his bulk, but he does not like to get punched. Not at all.  

Watching it in real time, it was easy to miss the clipping left hook that sent Lesnar stumbling across the Octagon like an afternoon drunk midway through the first. Maybe it’s just his cartoonish physique, but there is something uniquely hilarious about watching Lesnar get put on queer street. For a while there it looked like he might spin out and survive, just like he did at UFC 116, but not even Carwin put a beating on Lesnar like Velasquez did last night. With a smiling cut gashed open underneath his eye and no real intelligent defense for the onslaught, Herb Dean had no choice but to wave the fight off with about 30 seconds left before the bell.

In a weird way, the real interesting part of Lesnar’s career begins right now. Brock has never been the kind of guy who could sit still in one job for longer than a few years, so seeing how he reacts to no longer being “the toughest SOB around” will be pretty telling. His general demeanor suggests a man who has never had to overcome much adversity, athletically speaking anyway, and at 33 years old his window for improving may not be as wide open as we once thought. Guys of his size typically don’t age well, even if they do look like the bouncer at the scariest Viking bar in town.

You can bet that over the next few days we media types will dissect everything Lesnar’s done to this point since taking up MMA fulltime, particularly his decision to shun other top training camps in favor of staying home in Alexandria with his exclusive team and his handpicked coaches. There’s a certain arrogance in that, obviously. You have to admire how far he’s been able to come in such a short time, but you also have to kind of wonder: Wouldn’t he be better off at Jackson’s place? Or American Top Team? Or even with Cesar Gracie, who will clearly train absolutely anyone.

It also remains to be seen if what happened on Saturday night represents a significant promotional setback for the UFC. Losing its biggest draw as heavyweight champion clearly hurts, but the company also made a pretty boldfaced effort to market Velasquez to the Hispanic community leading up to this bout, in the process effectively (and kind of weirdly) defining UFC 121′s main event on the basis of ethnicity. If Velasquez can appeal to that historically fight-friendly demographic in the way the UFC hopes he can, he’ll be no slouch when it comes to drawing power himself.

Oh and finally, and here’s that vid of The Taker pausing during an interview with Ariel Helwani to ask a freshly defeated Lesnar, “You want to do it?” Pretty classy, Mr. Calaway, pretty classy.

Cagepotato Comments

Showing 1-25 of comments

Sort by : Show hidden comments
Fried Taco- October 26, 2010 at 7:52 am
Hi, I'm really late to the party. But it was clear to me that when the Undertaker said "You wanna do it" he was talking to Lesnar's new face-vagina.
vengful1- October 25, 2010 at 12:17 pm
I had 3 smoke breaks during the Shields/Kampman fight because I knew I wasn't going to miss anything. I didn't even want to smoke but i had to do something!
panther265- October 25, 2010 at 11:34 am
instead of taking vacation time off, brock should goto holland or thailand and learn some striking skills...even enter amateur boxing events...clearly he needs to do something
BONGTAR- October 25, 2010 at 8:53 am
The atmosphere was crazy there. Watching live, it seemed like Kampmann clearly won. And Cock Chestnar clearly got his ass whooped. he looked like a drunk in the cage after a solid jab. Me? I was drunk, in my own cage of self deprecation and low ethical standards. Hello everybody.
fatbellyfrank- October 25, 2010 at 7:56 am
^ Gonzaga?
Steve W- October 25, 2010 at 5:10 am
"The most pressing question now may be what unforeseen calamity will befall Velasquez"
I'm thinking the calamity will come in the form of a Brazilian who hits really hard.
ThrashingMad- October 24, 2010 at 9:15 pm
wow, lots of stupid things being said here. Nice.
stopdrinkingpee- October 24, 2010 at 9:10 pm
Nice piece, CP.
Just_the_tip- October 24, 2010 at 8:55 pm
I love how Lesnar haters think this loss means he's a chump as a fighter. Not even close. Styles make fights and Velasquez has that killer combination of striking/wrestling/cardio that was the key to beating Lesnar. But I have a hard time thinking of ANY other heavyweight that has that combination. It's clear that at this point to beat Brock you have to be able to stop his takedown, or more accurately, get up from his takedown like Velasquez did. What other heavyweight can you say could do that?......No, really, comment back and tell me who.

Like him or hate him Brock's gonna be around awhile, and he'll be in the upper echelon of the heavyweight division. Get used to it.
Bigslick- October 24, 2010 at 7:02 pm
Shields fought? All i remember is Sanchez out pointing Thiago and then I was all refreshed for Brock getting man handled by over training? Just my thoughts. Or is there another hole in his colon? Lesnar's intestine want to weigh in on this?
Mixed Martial Arts and Crafts- October 24, 2010 at 6:56 pm
damn anchor babies stealing our titles. somebody call Arizona and get this guys papers checked.
Elentius- October 24, 2010 at 5:25 pm
That just tells me that Lesnar was always a douche for real. I am sure he disrespected Taker and deserves all the bashing he gets. It is pretty classy of him you bleeding-heart d-bag. I would keep my name off that if I wrote it too.
dranokills- October 24, 2010 at 5:17 pm
edhedicus Says:
Sun, 10/24/2010 - 22:25

This fight was so clearly fixed! Lesnar survives a pounding from an absolute beast in Carwin, but a pudgy soft guy who nearly got beat by that piece of shit Kongo beats him? Dana to Brock- "Hey big guy, we could make alot of money by having a mexican as the champ. Lose to him, and you will get another shot soon, ok?" Brock to Dana- "Yeah boss, I like money". Seriously, Dana is just a white version of Don King. Epic fail to UFC for being FAKE!!!!!
wow dude tell us how it feels to be on crack, you crack baby.
I mean after you get done talking about how aliens implanted Elvis's love child into your rectum, please tell us more of your weird conspiracy theories.
mt59801- October 24, 2010 at 5:03 pm
I'd rather watch Nate Diaz and Ken Shamrock play a game chess then be forced to sit through another 15minutes of Jake"Hump & Grind" Shields bullshit. Fuck Lesnar, once Carwin exposed all the holes in his game it was just a matter of time, same goes for Silva. Whoever thinks the mexican fanbase won't leave boxing is insane or has never watched a Miguel Torres fight.
Gardeninja- October 24, 2010 at 3:45 pm
Brock needs to go to Golden Glory and Train(fight) with those guys. I hear they hit 3/4 power when they train so he can work on getting over if "gun shy" instincts.
edhedicus- October 24, 2010 at 3:21 pm
we will see when they match Bisping and Silva and Bisping wins. Need alot of growth in the Euro-trash market......
Shatski- October 24, 2010 at 1:32 pm
Hey, Travis.Logan, GSP did defend the belt at UFC 100 about the time Undisputed came out, but that came with a side of groin tearing. Guess the curse is in effect. Then again, it's a fight. Someone has to lose. It's a 50/50 chance it's going to be the guy on the cover. It's a start, but it's no Madden curse, yet. Now that EA actually has a game, maybe that will carry over to that.
Ballkick- October 24, 2010 at 12:42 pm
No, the fight with Carwin was fixed, This fight with Valesquez was just stopped when it should have been.
edhedicus- October 24, 2010 at 12:25 pm
This fight was so clearly fixed! Lesnar survives a pounding from an absolute beast in Carwin, but a pudgy soft guy who nearly got beat by that piece of shit Kongo beats him? Dana to Brock- "Hey big guy, we could make alot of money by having a mexican as the champ. Lose to him, and you will get another shot soon, ok?" Brock to Dana- "Yeah boss, I like money". Seriously, Dana is just a white version of Don King. Epic fail to UFC for being FAKE!!!!!
Your Dumb- October 24, 2010 at 12:21 pm
Undertaker pulled a page out of the Brock Lesnar playbook and yelled "Talk shit now!!!"
Canadian Chronic- October 24, 2010 at 12:18 pm
hey Lesnar, who's the fuckin man NOW?

this may have been the best week of my life.

Fraggle fuckstick gettin pwned TWICE, back to back and Chestnar gettin beat down, and exposed for the one dimensional fighter he is.

This is better than xmas, hallowe'en and steak n blowjob day all rolled into one
KingAtRock- October 24, 2010 at 12:03 pm
Am I the only one who read from that exchange with the undertaker, he was asking if they wanted to do a "spot" for wrestling. Like they had a plan to work the crowd for a wrestling angle, lesnar wasn't feeling up to it since he got destroyed and exposed.

Would have been a good fake wrestling angle tho.
for the love of mma- October 24, 2010 at 12:00 pm
Brock was Beat ! The Undertaker is Talkin Smack to him after he lost! lol so mean!
Gargoroth- October 24, 2010 at 11:43 am
I concur. I actually had Kampman winning that fight, Jake took a beating and was out of gas in round 2. Welcome to the U.F.C Jake LMAO!
ghostboner- October 24, 2010 at 11:13 am
WTF are you guys talking about, Jake Shields didn't fight last night.