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Six Other Seth Rogen/James Franco Films That Should’ve Been Canceled

UFC 121 Aftermath, Part Two: A Few Things That Seem Far Less Important By Comparison


(Your Brazilian SWAT training is no match for the power of positive thinking, Paulo. PicProps: UFC.com)

Mostly by virtue of the hype surrounding the main event, UFC 121 succeeded in preserving the aura of a big time fight show despite the fact that many of the bouts were … what’s the nice way to say this … terribly boring. Even still, a bunch of stuff happened that we need to mention: Jake Shields pretty much proved that it’s physically fucking impossible for top fighters from other organizations to look good in their UFC debuts.  Diego Sanchez defeated Paulo Thiago using the sheer supremacy of his personality. Gabriel Gonzaga showed that he’d be better off climbing to the top of a half-finished construction site and tossing barrels down at his opponents than try to strike with them. Tito Ortiz looked done like dinner, thus taking the next ironic step in his journey toward becoming – as we suggested on last week’s Bum Rush – the new Ken Shamrock.

Was it thrilling? Nah, but the ultimate crumbling of Casa de Lesnar made up for all of it. Shoot, it even reduced Dave Camarillo to tears. What more do you want?


Shields, though. WTF, playboy? Dude hasn’t lost since 2004, was coming off a solid five-rounder against Dan Henderson in his last Strikeforce outing and suddenly he shows up in the Octagon looking like an out-and-out rookie. Then he goes to the post-fight press conference and claims he had to cut 20 pounds in one day to make weight. Did he not know this fight was coming up? Was it lingering fallout from that back injury we told you about? Not to take anything away from Martin Kampmann, but it just goes to show you (whether fighters will admit it or not) there’s just something different about fighting in the UFC.

God forbid they make good on their threats to give Shields a welterweight title shot before he’s able to rebound with a better showing. Judging from what we just saw, he might otherwise stand the chance of getting literally murdered by Georges St. Pierre or Josh Koscheck in what would no doubt turn into a 25-minute wrestling clinic given by either Octagon vet. Given all the bitching that’s going on about wrestling in MMA these days, that might be the most unmarketable fight in history.

On the other hand, Ortiz and Matt Hamill gave us a good look at what happens when two grapplers try to have a boxing match and the result certainly wasn’t pretty, either. Really there’s almost nothing as frustrating as a couple of wrestlers engaging in a sloppy-punch-contest for 15 minutes while their corner men keep telling them how awesome they’re doing. Nonetheless, Hamill turned out to be just as terrible a matchup for Ortiz as most of us expected – too big, too strong, too young for the aging “Bad Boy” to contend with.

In the wake of the loss, UFC President Dana White indicated that Tito could finally be done with the company after going winless in his last five fights. Undaunted as ever, Ortiz promised during the postfight presser to get back to hard training in a couple of weeks, claiming his “hunger is there” again. "It’s not even close to the end of my career,” he said. Seriously, the Tito Ortiz show is about to get really heartbreaking, you guys. Those of you who enjoyed watching him throughout the early 2000s might want to tune out now before they do something terrible like feed him to Jon Jones or Ryan Bader or set him up with a Seniors Tour re-re-rematch with Chuck Liddell.

If you’d asked me on Saturday afternoon which two fighters would put on the most exciting display at UFC 121, I damn sure wouldn’t have said Diego Sanchez and Paulo Thiago. But there we were, watching Sanchez hulk-up and storm back to claim victory after a shaky first round, while Thiago resorted to such unorthodox tactics as a reverse spinning mule kick and a full elevator flip from his butterfly guard. Yeah, it was pretty great.

Sanchez strikes me as the kind of guy who sometimes wins just because his brain plainly doesn’t grasp the concept of losing. His barbaric yawp whilst hoisting Thiago over his head for a double leg slam was likely one of the most radical things we’ll see in the cage this year. Personally, I’m with Joe Rogan in saying Sanchez should stick it out at 170-pounds. Diego vs. Shields, anyone?

Brendan Schaub underlined the fact that he’s a comer in the heavyweight division by out-boxing Gonzaga. Schaub is easy to like, but from here on out the problem might be finding him appropriate and compelling matchups in the 265-pound class. Meanwhile, Gonzaga is essentially the heavyweight Jorge Gurgel. After all, who in their right mind would try to use his Brazilian jiu jitsu black belt when he could just make himself totally irrelevant by losing every fight instead?

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HEY- October 25, 2010 at 10:03 am
@ Jesus Tapped

Ya I know he says that often Arianny and Chandella are the ring girls for the event. It was just especially poignant in UFC 121 because this was the first time I noticed that Chandella bears a striking resemblance to Danny Glover.

That is all.
RwilsonR- October 25, 2010 at 9:14 am
Misanthrope - I knew that was how he did it!!!
ADMIRAL POOPOFF- October 25, 2010 at 8:59 am
I think Jake Shields...ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzZZZZZZ...
*fart*ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZ
Mofo- October 25, 2010 at 7:25 am
Ezekial… yakkety saks…. beat like a man who just slapped his wife…

These comments are almost as funny as watching Brock "do the Brock" across the UFC dance floor!

From now on at parties I'm gonna do the Brock. It's like break dancing, but more special. As in "short bus" special.
Mofo- October 25, 2010 at 7:25 am
Also, these guys get a CP shirt:

Deliberately funniest name: RearNakedSpoon

Accidentally funniest name: Your Dumb
Mofo- October 25, 2010 at 7:23 am
Everyone stop saying Brock gassed! He did not gas, he got punched in the face non stop! JEEZ.

Brock looked like he was boxing a baseball pitching machine.

Being punch drunk is NOT being gassed.

Or for you kids: punch drunk > gassed.

Carwin did do more damage with his opening upper cut than Cain did with all his punches combined. But Cain's hand speed is probably the best in the HW division and he was very fucking accurate at all times.

He also cut Brock's face with glancing blows (almost looked deliberate). The seam on the gloves will slice like a razor, see Randy v. Vitor II.
RearNakedSpoon- October 25, 2010 at 4:21 am
I think they should let Shields go to 185 before i judge his octagon performance. The cut clearly screwed him up and he was running purely on heart.

Also his level of grappling would destroy Silva muhahahahahahahaha
fatbellyfrank- October 25, 2010 at 2:19 am
@ Karma, not sure if your statement is for me, but I did say in a thread over the last day and a half I thought hamill didn't engage particularly aggresively compared to sanchez, I stand by that, I appreciate hamill won, and won well, but from where i sat it seemed matt was almost showing Tito to much respect, and stance for his stand up was horrible, he just seemed sloppy and loose, I know you can only fight whats in front of you, and hamill did win well, however, IMO I think he could have made more of a statement if he had been more aggressive. Just my opinion, Oh and if your statement wasn't for me, well, beg my pardon, I'll just shut the fuck up over here in the corner
Dagnut- October 25, 2010 at 1:34 am
@ Daley, watch it again after the first take down attempt no shots had landed and his face is bright red!! I'm not a brock fan and not saying it had any effect on the outcome except for how quickly it finished, Cain is a far superior fighter there's no disputing that.
Mr_Misanthropy- October 25, 2010 at 1:23 am
Jake Shields's fights are so boring he wins all of his decisions by putting the judges to sleep and having a midget in a ninja suit fill out their scorecards while they're passed out.
KarmaAteMyCat- October 24, 2010 at 11:20 pm
So you are saying hamill didn't amuse you and do a solid job out boxing Tito? if you had a hit percentage from that fight I would bet Matt was like in the 60%-85% of his strikes landed and did damage maybe you weren't watching the same fight I was?

Diego was amazing I couldn't while sitting at Buffalo Wild Wings and shouting "yes,yes,yes" over and over annoying the young couple on my right and the group of meat heads behind me.

Brendan Schaud, I think it could be all downhill from here considering those Jackson boys wont fight one another and considering that it makes him a half assed gate keeper. Likeable but not even close to being a contender.
ghostboner- October 24, 2010 at 11:03 pm
@FBF - Right?! It was like watching Rocky, only with a super sweet molester beard! And ya, Tito is done. I hope he doesn't read that, he'll be cryin himself to sleep...On 'is HYOOGE PILLOOW!!! TITO, PANTS, NOW!!!
fatbellyfrank- October 24, 2010 at 10:51 pm
Oh almost forgot, suck shit Tito you dumb ass fucken clown, take your stupid fucken bobble head and get the fuck out, you are no longer relevant in the world of MMA, play your cards right and you might get an invite to the Impact freakshow down under if it happens again next year, other than that, cant see any point in waiting by the phone
stopdrinkingpee- October 24, 2010 at 9:16 pm
If you had to sum up Diego Sanchez in one sentence: "The kind of guy who sometimes wins just because his brain plainly doesn’t grasp the concept of losing." Nice Whitman/Robin Williams reference, too.
fatbellyfrank- October 24, 2010 at 8:28 pm
@ Boner, yeah that was my fave fight yesterday, first round Court looked really unsure of himself, then talk about coming home strong, fucken awesome effort by Court, really lookin forward to seein him fight again
budsellers- October 24, 2010 at 8:20 pm
nothing definitive about that yet ghostboner... there was a question about whether or not lesnar verbally submitted during the press conference. same person mentioned that a photographer said that he/she/they heard him tap. dw said he heard lesnar yell out.
ghostboner- October 24, 2010 at 7:11 pm
Also, Court is the fucking man. Did anyone notice that he finished that choke from mount? With, it looked like, his hands under Jensen? Court is just the man.

Also, what is this about ref stoppage, I thought Brock tapped. Keep reading that it was ref stoppage, and Fightlinker even was so bold as to say early stoppage. The arm flailing and yelling looked to me like tapping due to strikes, but I couldn't hear very well. Any definitive word on this?
djp1988- October 24, 2010 at 7:07 pm
And by last 2 posts I mean FBF & Daley, although I agree with ghostboner on Jake Shields. I mean, he's a great wrestler and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
djp1988- October 24, 2010 at 7:05 pm
Greatly agree with the last 2 posts. I was rooting for Cain so I'm not bummed, but the fact is Brock is a good fighter, he just wasn't the better one last night. It's so funny how not that long ago people would only bring up how he was basically a MMA fighting bear / cheetah / viking / cyborg, but as soon as he lost (which fucking happens to EVERYONE!) he is some broken down weakling with no chin who has the gas tank of a fucking moped. It's not that Brock is bad, he's good, Cain's just great.

Also, race should have absolutely nothing to do with 2 shirtless bros rolling around getting sweaty so everyone, please get off the fucking high horse (self included after this post).
ghostboner- October 24, 2010 at 7:03 pm
This is the second thread where they have mentioned Jake Shields fighting. I must have missed that one, maybe it happened while I was asleep...
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