(Yeah, laugh it up.)
Welcome to MMA’s alternate universe. It looks like the MGM Grand the day before UFC 91, but something weird is going on. Junie Browning is getting mobbed in the hotel lobby while Roger Huerta sits in a bar quietly sipping espresso. Bruce Buffer walks by looking like he’s fresh from the gym and a drunk guy in an Affliction shirt almost loses his mind.
Fortunately for the UFC, they also have fans lined up around the corner just to see the weigh-in. At least two thousand of them fill the stands by four o’clock. Amazingly, the weigh-in starts right on time and is over twenty minutes later. Everyone makes weight. Brock Lesnar elicits as many boos as camera flashes. Joe Rogan interviews Randy Couture and compares Lesnar to the final boss in a video game. As much as I hate to admit, it’s a pretty good metaphor.
What’s worrisome for Couture is the cold hard numbers game. He weighs in at a svelte 220 pounds. Lesnar cuts to down to hit 265. By the time they step in the Octagon tomorrow night, Lesnar will likely be closer to 280, while Couture won’t be any bigger. It’s a sobering reality for Captain America. Or at least it ought to be.
Complete figures from today’s weigh-in after the jump.
Randy Couture (220) vs. Brock Lesnar (265)
Kenny Florian (156) vs. Joe Stevenson (156)
Gabriel Gonzaga (256) vs. Josh Hendricks (238)
Demian Maia (185) vs. Nate Quarry (185)
Tamdan McCrory (170) vs. Dustin Hazelett (170)
Aaron Riley (156) vs. Jorge Gurgel (155)
Rafael dos Anjos (155) vs. Jeremy Stephens (155)
Mark Bocek (155) vs. Alvin Robinson (155)
Ryan Thomas (170) vs. Matt Brown (171)
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Comments
Thu, 11/13/08 - 11:07
I can't believe he showed up at 220!!!! WTF happened to him? I hope he can still pull it off, but that weight makes me think something isn't right... Didn't he used to weigh in around 230?
Thu, 11/13/08 - 11:10
Im thinkin Randy might be kinda screwed.... on a brighter note, I just took away all potential for some douchebag taking pride in the fact that they were "FIRST !!!!"
Thu, 11/13/08 - 11:12
brock's hands don't look that big, granted they are big but nothing freakishly large
Thu, 11/13/08 - 11:19
When you consider the fact that Randy's hands are twice what yours or mine are, it's easy to remember that Brock's hands are freakishly large
Thu, 11/13/08 - 11:20
Randy will not lose to this homo. He's gonna send Brock home crying to some Jack Links Beef Jerky.
Thu, 11/13/08 - 11:27
the fact that randy weighed in at 220 probably tells us a little something about his gameplan ladies......let's think a little, captain america has a plan for everything, this ain't the first video game boss he's faced.
Thu, 11/13/08 - 11:29
Worst. Card. Ever. The Lesnar Couture fight will suck asshole, watch. It's gonna be a 3 round grappling match.
Thu, 11/13/08 - 11:32
size only matters if the skill levels the same, wrestling ain't fighting, I saw brock at walmart once, hes a big guy but not like holy shit big. Standing behind him at the check out lane i had a sudden urge to jump on his back n choke him out. i decided not to get my ass kicked.
Thu, 11/13/08 - 11:36
Randy in the 4th via choke. He'll take a beating to get there, but he'll get there.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 12:17
@ TUF Guy Title fights are five rounds, fuckhead. Go back to looking at Kimbo videos if grappling doesn't interest you.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 12:17
Brock wins in the first by shaken baby syndrome teehee
Fri, 11/14/08 - 12:27
Good to see a happy looking face-off -- if that's the way it actually went down.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 12:59
Randy better hope Lesnar makes a mistake. The Natural is in for long night, he could barely handle Tim Sylvia. Lesnar will win all rounds.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:00
i just hope lesnar conducts himself with some dignity this time. his display after the herring fight was shameful.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:02
@ Perky Barely handle Tim Sylvia? Did you even WATCH that fight? Just because he didn't finish him doesn't mean he barely handled him. Couture controlled that entire fight from start to finish.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:09
lesnar defeats couture via twisting his head off, 1:15 2nd round
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:09
First!!!
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:10
james this is true, but compared to fedor.....i'd say randy barely handled sylvia. lol, i love randy and all i really wanna see is him fight fedor, whatever has to happen before then so be it
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:10
Randy has got this in the bag, I don't think it will even be a challenge, he has a game plan and he is going to demolish this guy badly.....
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:15
hopefully randys wrestling and speeds good enough to stop a takedown, on the feet randy lights his ass up
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:26
I'm gonna slap the SHIT outta Cuntuuuuuuuuuuure
Fri, 11/14/08 - 02:08
gotta go with the experience on this one....Couture wins by decision
Fri, 11/14/08 - 02:16
Brock looks like Gun Jack form the Tekken.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 02:17
lesnar will win, and he will act like he's in big time wrestling cause that's what he thinks this sport is. it will be hard to qwatch randy get an ass beating but at least it won't be as bad as liddells last fight. jorge gurgel will lose cause that's what he does, he get to0 fixed on completing one move instead of adapting to how the fight goes and he will get ktfo.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 02:25
1ST!!! YES....
Fri, 11/14/08 - 02:37
yea lesnars hands are big, but i hear he has a tiny brock in his leotard
Fri, 11/14/08 - 02:40
I can't believe my fight with Nightman won't be televised. I'm gonna whoop his ass with Karate.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 02:43
I'm gonna look for a nipple twist before I try to call a winner.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 03:05
derly the goodluck nipple tweak only works for greg jacksons camp
Fri, 11/14/08 - 04:47
both of you first idiots are idiots. question: i started paying attention to mma (this website) about a year and a half ago and im interested in as to why brock lesner gets a chance at the heavyweight title after only winning two fights. because of pay per view buys or what
Fri, 11/14/08 - 04:49
what's up with the nipple twist? is there some documented science behind that? cuz its actually unreal.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 04:51
ooooh randy. ooooh randy, randy, randy. let me get this straight. the soon-to-be senoir citizen's gameplan is to be faster than the younger, gi-hugic, athletic monster? throughout a 5-round fight? oooooooooooh randy. yes... a true master of strategies, that one.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 04:57
Scroll back up and take a look at the caption again twizzler cocks! They just about stand eye to eye. Brock doesn't tower over this extremely experienced, extremely skilled champion. If Brock doesn't take Randy down right away, he'll get knocked out in the first round! That's right mutha fuckas, KTFO if he tries to stand with the champ. If not, he still loses by RNC in the 4th.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 05:05
@alba the reason brock gets a title shot is the fuckin sad state of the ufc heavyweight division. he's a monster and a true athlete... vary, vary rare. if he looses it will only be do to his own mistakes.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 05:09
@born wit 3nuts but why not give the title to someone who deserves it more, lesner is a cheese ball wrestler. why the fuck would anyone wrestle. i guess i would wrestle if i sucked balls a nfl football too
Fri, 11/14/08 - 05:14
TOP TEN REASONS BROCK LESNAR WIL LOSE... 10. Chest cockage 9. Chest cockage 8. Chest cockage 7. Chest cockage 6. Chest cockage 5. Chest cockage 4. Chest cockage 3. Chest cockage 2. Chest cockage 1. Randy Couture
Fri, 11/14/08 - 05:37
@ anonymous: because lesner vs. couture puts asses in seats. besides, who else is deserving & available right now? who would you rather see? mir and nog are tied up, werdum was released after getting KTFO... who else is more established than lesner in the ufc heavyweight division than who would make for even half as interesting a matchup? kongo? ugh... please. gotta agree with 3nuts... ufc heavyweight division sucks ass and has been lame for a looong time. much as i hate it (because he's an ass), lesner is a godsend to that division. after cock wins, whoever has a deathwish can challenge him. personally, i'd like to see liddell to move up to heavy... we already know he owns the current champ, and that he can't hang with the current light heavy crowd.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 05:50
age won't be a factor... randy looks amazing as ever. but he's about to fight another trained athlete who's 60 pounds heavier. that's impossible to overcome these days. this will be hard to watch...
Fri, 11/14/08 - 06:17
I know it's from Greg Jackson's camp, but it was only their secret weapon for a while. Now the secrets out. I've used it in the past 3 street fights I got in, and every single time I won. With a stiff left and a sharp right hook. And during the last fight I even decided to hit the guy a few times while he was on the ground, just to make sure he didn't wake up for a while.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 06:31
Ok, so I've looked at a ton of pictures, trying to figure out how Brock's chest tatoo resembles a penis in the slightest way. I can't see the similarity. Is it at the top of the sword, perhaps? Where the blade appears to widen like a mushroom head? I just can't tell from the many crappy pictures I found. And Randy will whoop Brock's ass.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 07:51
Legend has it that if you stroke Brock's tattoo it'll grow. Eventually spilling out his reproductive juices, and this is how The Brockman reproduces.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 09:50
I'm expecting a great fight. Both guy's are well matched regardless of age or weight. I'm hoping we get a few rounds out of it, and hopefully Brock doesn't make another rookie mistake to give Couture the chance of sinking in a rear naked. As for the state of the Heavyweight division, it could be a while for things to pick up. Brock could be the next UFC Champion for a long time, and some UFC fans may not take to Nogueira's 'take-punishment-lay-and-wait-for-a-submission style', but both are stellar Heavyweights. As for Verdum, he took a setback at the last show, but hopefully he'll learn from that. Anyways, here's looking forward to what could be a great main event, if it stinks up the joint at least we have Rampage/Wanderlei 3 coming up as well as GSP/BJ (Classic Pride battles).
Fri, 11/14/08 - 10:04
First!!
Fri, 11/14/08 - 10:17
When was GSP/BJ a "Classic Pride battle"? I understand the Rampage/Wandy 3 being a "Classic Pride battle," but I always thought GSP/BJ was in the UFC.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 11:40
BS....im gonna pin you down with my big strong arms....you'll try to fight me, ill come inside....always good to see others watch that great show
Fri, 11/14/08 - 12:37
Randy Couture, 3rd Round, Flying Omomuratine
Fri, 11/14/08 - 12:55
@Derly LMFAO those last couple comments are some of the funniest shit Ive read on here lol.. As for the fight, ya Dana is stackin the odds against Cotoure so he can then ride Brocks cock all the wayto the bank, exploit the Arian Barbarian like good ole Vince did. Also should brock be under suspension for all the roids he got busted with in 2001..fucker had about ten pounds of it...
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:02
What the hell is an Omomuratine?
Fri, 11/14/08 - 01:49
dam wwe bullshit
Fri, 11/14/08 - 02:52
anybody else been getting the chickipedia when they hit cagepotato.com?! Captain American is going to get nailed. Sad but true.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 03:19
Sorry that was a typo, meant Wand/Page. Still, 2 great fights to look forward to if this is a wash-out. Can't believe nobody's mentioned or made light of Brock's hatred of planes. He includes travelling on planes as training. Maybe Dana spikes his milk A-team style to get his ass to vegas and so forth
Fri, 11/14/08 - 03:40
Couture by TKO or Submission in the 4th.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 04:16
Anyone think Couture's chin bight be questioned in this one? 1 punch in the kisser from those lunch boxes that Brock calls hands, and I think it might be over. Mark my words, Randy won't be able to take a first punch like the one Brock delivered to herring. If Randy can hopefully avoid one of those, he will sub Brock. I wouldn't bet a penny on this one. Also, Florian/Stevenson will be a fucking great fight. That one fight make this a very watchable card.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 04:17
@KimC Quote: "Brock wins in the first by shaken baby syndrome" That is the most awesome comment ever! Thanks for the LOLs. =)
Fri, 11/14/08 - 04:32
randy is going to sleep. he wouldn't stand a chance against fedor and will get hurt by lesnar.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 04:51
"Anyone think Couture’s chin bight be questioned in this one? 1 punch in the kisser from those lunch boxes that Brock calls hands, and I think it might be over." That's a good point.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 05:37
all chestnar needs to do is pump out jabs and straights. crack cooter with one or two and then shoot in. get him worried about the takedown and then he can really hurt him on the feet. conditioning won't be a factor cuz chestnar can just lay on cooter all day if he wants.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 05:44
couture to win by tko 3.24 in round 4
Fri, 11/14/08 - 06:36
why the fuck are you guys talking about brock beigna champion for a while???!! okay so you think he will beat randy... you think he will beat big Nog? really? i guess you are more stupid than the UFC guy... we dont really know hows randy cause he hasnt fought for more than a year bug Nog used to be number 2 and after fedor demolished him he has been number 2. That won't change
Fri, 11/14/08 - 08:08
Hey guys..I talked to Randy and Brock this afternoon to go over their game plans. They are both ready to fight and it should be a good battle. I gave them a few tips on how I would approach the fight which they will be utilizing this evening.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 08:12
Ok, first I gotta give props to all you Tater-ites who come up with such funny posting names - "just some dong" - "piss in my own fruit tray" - "massive mma erection" - "shitwhistle" - "randys cock tattoo" - "shaken baby syndrome"!!! LMAO! damn I wish I was creative enough to come up with something funny ...... ;-P ANYWAY ....... *** I noticed that the FIRST time I read this column, the lead in read "Junie Browning is getting mobbed in the hotel lobby while FORREST walks through unmolested." I see that has changed now. So who got their feelings hurt??? Did Dana object to the UFC LHW champion being mildly dissed in this way???
Fri, 11/14/08 - 08:31
brock should be able to beat anyone... he's huge even for a heavyweight and he's a pure athlete. top notch wrestling allows you to dictate fights and have a long mma career. so that's why i think he'll be champ for a while. if that's what he wants. like randy said, he's him 9 years ago. he just needs to keep training cardio & jitz defense, and keep sucking down those HGHs.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 08:42
@ Chiggs ...The Arian Barbarian...I'm massive LOLing at that!
Fri, 11/14/08 - 08:45
i was pissed when i heard couture had a contract dispute. when i seen lesnar demolish herring i wanted this fight. now that its here i hope that im right and lesnar is just a green mma fighter that doesn't cut in the top of the division.. and i wold have loved to see carwin vs. lesnar befor this one
Fri, 11/14/08 - 08:46
i was pissed when i heard couture had a contract dispute. when i seen lesnar demolish herring i wanted this fight. now that its here i hope that im right and lesnar is just a green mma fighter that doesn't cut in the top of the division.. and i wolud have loved to see carwin vs. lesnar befor this one
Fri, 11/14/08 - 09:08
Jay Smith is a fag
Fri, 11/14/08 - 09:54
why did they take that line out? anyway tell the truth by "sipping espresso" you meant downing shots of vodka and huerta and the drunk guy in the affliction shirt are the same person. poor poor huerta. Captain america!!!!!
Fri, 11/14/08 - 10:24
Poor Randy, he's going to take a beating.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 10:44
I don't care how much flak I cop for this. I smell a Work brewing between Lesnar and Couture. Couture doesn't rank well against larger opponents who ae skilled in wrestling. If it isn't going to be worked, WHEN LESNAR WINS, they'll finally bust him on Roid Charges motivated by political reasons, the same shit they pulled on Barnett when he pounded Couture's face in.
Fri, 11/14/08 - 11:12
Coutures tanner, he win. Pasty Lesnar's always lose, it's in the bible.
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