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UFC Fighters and the (Fictional) Crimes They’ve Committed: The Winners!

(Dennis Hallman — Catfishing. Photo via Esther Lin/MMAFighting.)

Last week’s “UFC Fighters and the Fictional Crimes They’ve Committed” contest, if nothing else, proved that MMA-themed comedy is not as easy as it sounds. If you don’t believe me, just ask that MMA Roasted guy (*mimes shotgun blast*). There were some mildly amusing entries among your overplayed and plain confusing attempts at humor, however, so let’s get to the honorable mentions…

Rick Gemi: Rashad Evans – Brandishing a stanky leg without a license

Brad Fowler: Ben Henderson — receiving stolen property (decisions)

Jay Smith: Brock Lesnar — Impersonating a UFC fighter

Travis Anderson: Tim Sylvia — Public Defecation

Just so you guys are aware, dropping a Tim Sylvia poop joke will earn you an honorable mention at the minimum in all future contests, as per the CagePotato mandate.

And now, the winners…

Scott Johnson: Bjorn Rebney – D.U.I (Dickriding Under the Influence)

Chris Morse: Dennis Hallman – Illegally Smuggling Grapes into the Octagon

So yeah, our two funniest entries were dick and ball jokes. Way to play right into Bob Arum’s understanding of our sport, guys!

To our winners, please email with your address and shirt size, and we’ll get your CP swag in the mail A.S.A.P. Or maybe never. Either way, you are powerless to decide, MWAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

-J. Jones


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