Sure, UFC 148 had countless hours of commercials and press conferences, but did you get a look at this poster?!? (Photo: UFC.com)
It’s been four days and two hundred Chael posts since we last took you for a guided tour of the Octagon, but by god we’re ready to do it again, brother. At your service this eve is weekend foreman Chris Colemon. Treat him well, kids.
All ten fighters made weight last night, though three had to pull a Rousey just to hit the mark. In the evening’s main event, Mark Munoz will look to rebound from stomach-turning elbow surgery as he takes on Chris Weidman. Munoz has flirted with a title shot before, but can he get through the highly-regarded, undefeated Weidman to get back on track?
Riding shotgun on the card are Joey Beltran and James Te Huna. The Mexicutioner picked up a victory and a tapeworm while away from the UFC; he returns tonight as a light heavyweight to slug it out with the heavy-handed Kiwi. Someone’s getting concussed.
All of the cool kids are inside talking about the fights. If you’re cool, you’ll join us too.
And we…are…LIVE!!! They were billing the main event as a #1 Contender Bout in the pre-show, and since that designation is legally binding I guess we’ll be seeing the winner of the Munoz-Weidman bout facing Anderson Silva soon. Well, that’s settled.
Here we go!
Rafael dos Anjos vs. Anthony Njokuani
R1: Dos Anjos tries a Segal kick to the face, but whiffs. Nice inside leg kick by Dos Anjos and Njokuani fires back with a combo. BIG left floors Njokuani and Dos Anjos is all over him with a takedown, but it’s short lived and Njokuani is back to his feet. Another takedown by the Brazilian, but Njokuani is back up again. The Assassin pushes off and we’re back to a striking match. Both men are measuring their attacks and slow to commit. Dos Anjos has Njokuani backing up, but we’re still short on exchanges. Dos Anjos with another shot, but he’s stuffed and relegated to knee striking Njokuani against the cage.
R2: Dos Anjos returns to that heavy inside leg kick to open the second frame. The Nigerian responds with a body kick. We’re still in single-shot mode–very few combos getting launched. Njokuani is grunting like Monica Seles with each strike. Dos Anjos is working for the takedown again, but he can’t drag The Assassin to the ground. Dos Anjos wants this fight on the ground, and he finally hoists Njokuani up for the slam. Njokuani manages to work his way out of half guard and we’re back on our feet with Dos Anjos maintaining his body lock death grip, eager to return to the canvas. That was, what? Four missed takedowns? But lucky number five gets the job done and we’re back on the mat. Dos Anjos was looking for an arm in guillotine, but Njokuani stands up again and the horn sounds.
R3: Njokuani is down here, so he’ll likely need to put Dos Anjos away. Dos Anjos circling around while Njokuani is landing a punch here or there. Dos Anjos responds with a nice right hand. Dos Anjos is crowding Njokuani now, but still not letting go. Ok, now he fires off a combo then presses Njokuani up against the cage as he works for a takedown. Denied, but Dos Anjos is nothing if not diligent–he gets the The Assassin down on his second shot. The Brazilian has half mount and probably has his eye on a kimura, but he gives it up to drop some leather. He opened up a little too much and Njokuani is back to his feet as the fight comes to a close. We’re headed to the scorecards.
And Rafael Dos Anjos takes the uanimous decision (30-27 x 2 and 29-28)
We’ve got a bantamweight battle up next.
T.J. Dillashaw vs. Vaughan Lee
R1: Dillashaw breaks the silence with a combo, and Lee returns fire with some heavy shots of his own. Dillashaw misses with a wild head kick. The former TUF’er ducks a head kick, scoops Lee’s leg, and dumps him to the mat, but the Brit is back to his feet. Dillashaw’s not giving up on that takedown, though, and he works his way to Lee’s back and sinks his hooks in while standing. Lee’s fighting off the rear naked choke attempt on his feet, but Dillashaw is cranking away. Aaaand the tapout! Dillashaw scores a first round submission victory.
T.J. Dillashaw wins via neck crank (2:33 R1)
And we take a break in tonight’s action to promote the Urijah Faber-Renan Barao bout at UFC 149. Shockingly, no one was seriously injured in the production of the commercial.
Karlos Vemola vs. Francis Carmont
R1: Vemola circles away and bull rushes in for the takedown, but Carmont stuffs the shot. Temporarily, that is–Vemola drags him down with a body lock. Carmont works his way free and stands up directly into a standing guillotine. The French Canadian takes Vemola down, but is still in the choke. Let’s hope his air is “Limitless”. (See what I did there? It’s because of his nickname. That’s why it’s hilarious.) Carmont pulls his head free and has Vemola pinned against the cage in side-mount. Now Carmont is slapping on a painful looking key lock, which he uses to take mount. Vemola frees his arm and works back to his feet, almost finding himself in a guillotine as well. Oh, now Carmont wants the takedown and Vemola has him in an arm-in guillotine. Carmont escapes and probably would have gone for a guillotine had time not expired.
R2: Big front kick to the grill of Vemola, but he’s still breathing long enough to charge in for a stuffed takedown. Carmont drops down for a…wait for it…guillotine, but Vemola rolls free. Vemola working hard for the takedown, but Carmont drops to his own back with Vemola’s arms trapped in a crucifix. Limitless switches it up to a rear naked, squeezes the hell out of it, and draws the tap.
Francis Carmont wins via rear naked choke (1:39 R2)
Up next we’re taking a trip to the welterweight division.
Aaron Simpson vs. Kenny Robertson
R1: Robertson fires off a huge head kick that catches nada but air, then rushes in and presses Simpson against the cage with a body lock. Simpson pushes him off and scores a knee to the body. They are throwing! Both men land hands before Robertson delivers a few knees to the
gut six pack. Simpson is hte first to secure a takedown but it’s short lived. Robertson gets back to his feet and a wild tumult of reversals ends with Robertson landing a big right hand that splits Simpson’s wig open along the hairline. Simpson forces action up against the cage, but Roberston spins around and presses Simpson to the fence. Both men are fighting to gain the wrestling advantage, which Simpson gains momentarily as he gets behind Robertson and takes him down. Robertson is quickly back up. Damn, we’ve got a fight on our hands.
R2: Robertson responds to a punch with an attempted judo toss, but is denied and Simpson takes his back standing once again. Knees to the ass from Simpson and after more jockeying for grappling control he puts Robertson on his back. Robertson is struggling to get up which allows A Train to take his back. Back up, back down, back up. There’s a lot of positional control and reversing going on here between these two capable wrestlers. Simpson had a bizarre rear facing mount for a moment, but he’s able to get behind Robertson once more and deliver some hard shots on the ground for the last minute of the frame.
R3: Robertson is looking a little fatigued as we enter the final round. Spinning back kick from Simpson misses its mark. More clinchwork against the cage ends with Simpson taking Roberson’s back and dragging him to the canvas once more. A Train nearly locks up a reverse triangle choke, but Robertson escapes and gets back to his feet. Simpson, clearly the fresher of the two, slams him back to the ground. Simpson is standing over Robertson in guard dropping down some heavy fists to the head and body. Simpson moves to side mount with thirty seconds left. He’s trying to grab an arm, but chooses to wail on Robertson to close the fight.
Aaron Simpson wins via unanimous decision (30-27 & 29-28 x 2)
Like Babe Ruth promising that sick kid a homerun, I’m going to guarantee you kids a knock out in this one. Unfortunately, if I’m wrong you all die of cancer. It’s a gamble, but one that I’m willing to make.
James Te Huna vs. Joey Beltran
R1: No time wasted between these two. They’re both throwing, but Te Huna is reaching Beltran first. Te Huna looks mighty relaxed out there, though Beltran isn’t shy to throw. It’s a measured pace, but both men are uncorking their hands. Te Huna went for a reverse elbow like Silva-Frykland but missed. Te Huna scores with a combo and has Beltran backing up. Te Huna is letting the hands go now. Big right. He looks very confident and is mixing up his strikes. Beltran counters and clips Te Huna before spinning and pressing him against the cage. Te Huna get free from the cage and is connecting with big shots. He knocks Beltran down with a huge left hook and follows him to the ground. Te Huna working hard from mount with ground and pound, but Beltran somehow gets back up and eats plenty of more haymakers as the bell sounds.
R2: Mexicutioner gutted out that last round, let’s see what he’s got. Te Huna is very confident out there, mixing it up with body shots, upper cuts, etc. Beltran isn’t reaching him, but he’s standing tall. Te Huna with a single leg plants Beltran on his back…interesting choice considering he was owning the striking, but Beltran has power. Te Huna is working from guard, but the Mexicutioner nullifies his attack and they get stood up. Te Huna launches his hands before failing on another takedown. Beltran just isn’t reaching the New Zealander with his hands. Or feet. Te Huna’s slowed his attack as the clock ticked away and got tagged with a short shot that dropped him to his knees as the bell rang.
R3: Beltran is eager to throw, as he can’t take the decision at this point. Beltran forces Te Huna against the cage and lands a few elbows as they separate. Te Huna dumps him to the mat momentarily, but they’re back on their feet. There’s going to be a lot of cancer in Potatoland if no one finds the off-switch. Te Hun brings the action to the mat, but Beltran is back up. Big body shots by Te Huna, but Beltran don’t care. Two minutes left. Te Huna dumps Beltran to the canvas but lets him back up; the Kiwi’s looking tired now as Beltran takes him down. One minute. They’re standing again as Beltran scores a tight elbow against the cage. Beltran is going for it as the clock ticks down. And they slug away until the end. They’re headed to the scorecards. You’re headed to the oncologist.
James Te Huna takes the unanimous decision (30-26 & 30-27 x 2)
Time for our main event. We’re scheduled for five rounds of action; let’s see if it takes that long to find a winner.
Mark Munoz vs. Chris Weidman
R1: Wiedman opens with a couple of high kicks before ducking down and shooting in. All American off to a good start in control on the ground in side mount. Weidman works his way to Munoz’s back, but the Filipino Wrecking Machine stands up before eating two knees and returning to safer territory on the ground. Weidman maintains top control and nearly sinks in a guillotine before opting to drop some ‘bows. Weidman is calm and an in control as he drops elbows and tries to isolate an arm. The crowd boos–they didn’t pay for high level grappling and momentary lapses in action! Weidman pounces on another guillotine from mount. Munoz scrambles free, but Weidman is all over him. They’re up on their feet and Weidman lands another knee before taking Munoz’s back. The round is over. That was all Weidman. Every second over it.
R2: Weidman takes him down again as soon as they’re within feet of each other. More control on the ground from Weidman, but Munoz wrangles free and we’re back to a standup battle. Munoz lunges in with a punch and Weidman connects with a hard elbow. Munoz drops forward, out cold, and the ref doesn’t notice for a good twenty to thirty seconds as Weidman pounds away. Munoz is bleeding like a stuck pig all over the canvas. Horribly late stoppage.
My god, that whole fight was Weidman’s, bell to bell. He extends his record to a perfect 9-0.
Chris Weidman scores the TKO victory (1:37 R2)
Well, that’s a wrap on tonight’s action. In the words of Seth Falvo, I need a Mr. Pibb and a blowjob, and not necessarily in that order. Take it easy, Nation.