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UFN 15: The Undercard

(The head kick. Photo courtesy of MMA Weekly)

You didn’t see it on Spike TV last night, but the undercard bouts for Ultimate Fight Night 15 were worth showing up for all by themselves. Yours truly was Octagon-side for the whole thing, and when I wasn’t hanging out in Clay Guida‘s dressing room (more on that later), I was busy being impressed by some UFC newcomers.

Dan Miller def. Rob Kimmons via submission (rear naked choke) at 1:27 of round one

This one was quick, with only sporadic fits of action. Miller jumped to Kimmons’ back almost immediately. Kimmons tried to defend and dump him off, but Miller wasn’t having it. After about a minute of absolutely no movement, Miller locked in the choke and Kimmons fell backwards ala Frank Trigg against Matt Hughes, then tapped meekly while the ref took his time about stopping it.

Mike Massenzio def. Drew McFedries via submission (kimura) 1:26 of round one

New Jersey’s Mike Massenzio was particularly impressive in his first-round submission win over Drew McFedries. He put his wrestling skills to good use right away, shooting in on McFedries and getting side control in the ensuing scramble. After McFedries recovered his guard and attempted a triangle choke, which Massenzio shrugged off, it was countdown to kimura time. Massenzio got to north-south and extended McFedries’ arm, forcing him to tap.

Alessio Sakara def. Joe Vedepo via KO (kick) at 1:27 of round one

The most brutal finish of the night also came in the prelims, as Alessio Sakara put his shin directly on Joe Vedepo’s chin early in the first. Vedepo was looking for the takedown from the start, but Sakara’s defense looked much improved. When Vedepo couldn’t get him down he consented to stand and trade. That’s about when the high kick landed with a vicious crack that elicited ‘ooohs’ from the crowd. Vedepo stiffened up and keeled over backwards. Sakara moved in to finish, but it was — to put it mildly — unnecessary.

Joe Lauzon def. Kyle Bradley via TKO (ref. stoppage) at 1:34 of round two

Joe Lauzon found himself in a tougher scrap than he probably expected against Kyle Bradley. Bradley’s stand-up looked sharp early on and he stung Lauzon with a good uppercut before Lauzon dove for a heel-hook and nearly got it. Bradley fought through and made it to the second, where Bradley put a couple punch combinations together and briefly had Lauzon looking surprised. J-Lau stayed on the attack, however, and put Bradley down with a double-leg. Bradley gave up his back in the scramble and Lauzon unleashed with elbows and punches, flattening him out and finishing him with a barrage of unanswered shots.

Jason Brilz def. Brad Morris via TKO (ref stoppage) at 2:54 of round two

Brilz outwrestled and outlasted Morris in a somewhat sloppy ground war. Morris ran out of gas and ideas in the second and laid beneath Brilz waiting for the stoppage. Mercifully, it came quickly. Brilz looks like he could do some damage if he sharpens up his jiu-jitsu.

Wilson Gouveia def. Ryan Jensen via submission (armbar) at 2:04 of round two

Poor Ryan Jensen. He fired up the crowd by pounding on Gouveia for a round and a half, landing some good shots from Gouveia’s guard. In the second, however, he got a little too comfortable and left his arm in the danger zone. It was all the opportunity Gouveia needed. He locked up the armbar and Jensen couldn’t pull out of it. That’s what happens when you get cute against a guy like Gouveia.

Cagepotato Comments

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Dakyn- September 17, 2008 at 9:07 pm
Geriatric Peon - Gouviea pulling off an armbar when someone was beating him up badly is exactly the kind of thing that warrents Sub of the Night; at least it is in my opinion.
the glza- September 17, 2008 at 8:51 pm
rule 14 guys... really -- never read the rules of the internet before?
TUF Guy- September 17, 2008 at 6:00 pm
GUIDAFORPREZ I don't need to prove myself. I am just pointing out all you flaming homos and how you're staining the MMA world with your homoerotica (see Aptninja) , he mentions eating buttholes 5 times in two comments then gives himself props and applogoizes under a different name once he realizes how gay he actually sounds. I already gave my Information to anyone who has a problem with my attitude. F*ck you by the way. I already said that I'll be at the Couture Gym, so if someone feels like I am just talking shit come and test me.
GUIDAFORPREZ- September 17, 2008 at 5:52 pm
TUF Guy, why did you write all that shit about yourself? Nobody here cares; the fact that you are trying to prove yourself on this site anonymously is pathetic.
Canucklechuck- September 17, 2008 at 5:44 pm
I read it. Thought it was funny. A little heavy on the "hole eating", but funny.
TUF Guy- September 17, 2008 at 5:08 pm
Cliff notes. Ain't nobody gonna read all that shit.
Aptninja- September 17, 2008 at 4:47 pm
Oh, man! I shouldn't have typed how I wanted to eat hole! What was I thinking? That totally undermined me, but at the same time I just wanted to eat hole so much that I couldn't resist saying it. This is the exact same way I lost my teaching job.

Look, if you want to deduce my real name using some sort of internet traceroute, then figure out where I live based on my ISP, then fly to that place and find my apartment -- which is kind of tricky, because it's set back from the street a little -- then wait until I come home, explain who you are, remind me of this post and try to kick my ass, be my guest. Make sure you win, though, because if I choke you out I'm totally going to eat your hole.

Isn't that terrible, that feeling of powerlessness? It's the kind of thing that would make a man take up fighting.
TUF Guy- September 17, 2008 at 4:37 pm
Discusting. I wouldn't even beat your ass, you'd enjoy it too much.
Aptninja- September 17, 2008 at 4:36 pm
...and by the way I would love to eat that hole.
Aptninja- September 17, 2008 at 4:27 pm
You taught the Green Berets how to fight single-handedly? I detect a hole in your system.
TUF Guy- September 17, 2008 at 4:22 pm
In my MMA debut I fractured a guys face so bad with my strikes that I was banned from the sport for all eternity. Sometimes I consider it a blessing in disguise that they banished me from the sport because I am a good guy deep down and if I would have continued doing MMA I would have never had the chance to singe-handedly teach the Green Berets the art of turning your fists into registered weapons.

And as for you idiots, I am sure if I even gave any of you chumps a 'good job' fist bump I would probably end up impaling you with your own humerus bone.
Geriatric Peon- September 17, 2008 at 3:50 pm
It was an interesting start to the night with Miller winning so skill fully but in a way that just looked goofy. Taking the guys back is good (of course) but sitting up there like yoda for about 2 minutes was just funny looking.
Brilz may have been a little sloppy but he man handled his opponent in his UFC debut so big ups to him. I hope he has the sense to leave Omaha and go train with a good team unlike what Houston has done (or not done).
I was surprised to see Mcfedries get dominated like that. He had no answer on the ground just getting handled.
I felt bad for Jensen, he was just abusing Gouveia. I don't think Gouveia deserved submission of the night for catching a guy who was destroying him to that point. Schafer should of gotten sub of the night for his utter domination and use of the arm triangle.
Perennial- September 17, 2008 at 3:38 pm
GIF's, videos, please!