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The Ultimate Fighter 9.6 Recap: Isn’t It Ironic?

The Ultimate Fighter 9 – Episode 6 Submissions – Watch more Funny Videos

When Michael Bisping went AWOL during Dean Amasinger‘s fight against Damarques Johnson, the nation wanted answers. Had he been in a car wreck? Was he holed up in a motel room with a crack pipe? Did he finally get picked up on his outstanding buggery warrants? Nah, the dude just overslept. He was badly jet-lagged, and was sawing logs while Dean was getting his ass kicked. Not exactly the cliffhanger we were hoping for, and the whole thing was resolved in about 20 seconds. 

Other than that, last night’s episode was very satisfying, with two fights (I’m liking this trend) and some highly ironic tooth-loss thrown in at the end. To begin at the beginning…

Hostility among the Americans continues, with Jason Pierce talking shit about Cameron Dollar while he’s in earshot, after Cameron tries to give Dean advice about what he should have done when he was caught in Damarques’s triangle. Cameron thinks he’s going to be the next Team U.S. member to be picked to fight, and he’s right: Bisping selects Martin Stapleton vs. Cameron Dollar as the second lightweight quarterfinal.

Team U.K. talks about Martin Stapleton like he’s Bill Brasky. Apparently, Stapleton is a trainer for the Royal Marines, and is considered the strongest wrestler on the U.K. lightweight team. He’s clearly more confident than the self-doubt-filled Cameron, which comes across during their interactions in the house: Cameron is sullen and quiet, while Stapes is jovial and enjoys taking the piss out of the Americans.

Cameron is concerned about adrenaline dumps and "wiggin’ out." Fighting scares him to death, as he repeatedly tells his team, who try to tell him that that’s normal. (Sure, but for a professional fighter?) Mentally, he should be at a disadvantage. But then, Stapleton writes the names of his wife and child on his hat, which seems to be a curse on TUF — and on most competitive reality shows, really. Once they show you going on about your family, that tends to be the episode you’re sent packing. If you haven’t noticed that before, you will from now on.

The Dollar/Stapleton fight is susprisingly brief. After a feeling out process, Cameron hits Martin in the back of the head as he shoots for a takedown, which seems to stun him. Cameron is able to clinch, then toss Martin to the ground and get on top. Martin gives up his back in an attempt to escape, and Cameron immediately begins to work for the rear-naked choke. After some struggle, he gets it. The series is tied at 2-2 and Bisping no longer has his bragging rights.

The fight selections are back in the hands of the Americans, who choose Frank Lester against James Wilks. Hendo judges James to be "a pussy on his feet." Frank is a tightly-wound ball of violent energy. He will not stop shadow-boxing, ever. He also considers Wilks something of a carpet-bagger (as the Brit has been living in California for years) and is obsessed with the idea of destroying him. Says Frank: "He’s not an American, he’s not a Brit, he’s just an asshole."

Frank’s hyperactive anger is obvious to his coaches, who try to settle him down during practice. Frank tells Henderson and Cyrille that he’s "having trouble just controlling my brain," and he feels "like I’m going to put my hand through a window." Hendo tries to explain that a clear, relaxed mind is more beneficial in a fight. Then, Damarques offers Frank $100 for each tooth he knocks out of James’s mouth. FORESHADOWING, Y’ALL.

The Lester/Wilks fight is a thriller. In round 1, Frank comes out throwing his wild overhand rights, as expected. He lands two hard lefts when James charges in, and James responds with a leg kick. After some striking exchanges, Frank knocks James down with punches, but James goes for a leg lock, then follows Frank to the mat when he tries to escape. In side control, James goes for a kimura, loses it, then goes to north-south position. He returns to side control, drops some elbows, and tries for the leg lock again, but loses it. Frank gets up and James tries a guillotine, eats some punches, then lands some big knees. More clinch fighting, with Frank working some dirty boxing and James throwing in knees wherever he can find them. In the last 30 seconds of the round, James scores a takedown, lays on Frank for a while, then tries for an arm triangle choke as the round ends.

Between rounds, Lester says his front teeth (which were fake anyway, but still) got knocked out by James’s knees. The fight is stalled while Frank’s corner tries to pry his teeth out of his mouthpiece, which causes Bisping to freak out in protest. To his annoyance, the fight is allowed to go on, but Frank is clearly rattled by the tooth situation, and throws big, scared, looping punches. James snaps a kick into the side of Frank’s face. They clinch after a failed takedown from James and exchange punches. James drags Frank to the mat and throws down a punch. Frank briefly gets to his feet but is taken down again, and James easily passes from side-control to mount. Frank rolls to escape, and James grabs his arm and extends it, immediately causing Frank to shout "TAP!" Game over.

And that makes it 3-2, Team U.K. The American who was terrified of fighting won, and the American who was dying to fight lost. It’s like rain on your wedding day. It’s a free ride when you’ve already paid.

Cagepotato Comments

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BackbaconBilly- May 8, 2009 at 3:58 pm
Bisping came across as a total douche with the world's lamest excuse, he lost alot of respect ( as a coach ) can't stand him as a fighter. Anyways, then he over-reacts with regards to the tooth episode trying to make up for the fact that he bailed on his fighter last show, sad.
eat my buns- May 7, 2009 at 9:22 pm
quote of that episode was at the last scene with Frank spitting in the trash, "Oh Shit, another tooth" i juss laughed
Alanis Morissette- May 7, 2009 at 5:36 pm
TUF Guy sucks my dick monday to friday
Anonymous- May 7, 2009 at 3:41 pm
I hope Bisping dies of ass cancer.
Anonymous- May 7, 2009 at 3:40 pm
TUF Guy loves cock
SCM- May 7, 2009 at 1:25 pm
Wow TUF guy. Im sure no one believes you whatsoever.

This was a good episode though. The only thing Im thinking is that the UFC needs to do a better job at picking dudes to be on the season . It seems like alot of pussies got on this episode. Dana needs to do one on one interrogations and shit to weed out the pussies and noobs. Kind of bullshit if you ask me.
Edith- May 7, 2009 at 12:51 pm
I've stepped around a lot of rings, and lemme tell ya it's a LOT harder than typing on faces. As for $Dollar$, I just bet that Junie B is wishing he had bragged more about how many girls he's humped. Those numbers can really climb when there's no repeat customers.
TUF Guy- May 7, 2009 at 11:54 am
All you idiots STFU. You dumb shits never stepped foot into a cage or ring but yet you know everything about MMA. At least I train and fight.

I'd like to hear one of you dingleberries in public, stuttering about MMA, then fuck you up real bad and be like "yea BJ Penn really is a crybaby isn't he... but tell me something, what does that make you, lying there in the fetal position begging for your life?"

Shatski- May 7, 2009 at 11:22 am
I'd like to see that settled, M@tt. The only downside is, it'd almost be like giving that dude a free ride into the UFC to have a fight when he "lost" the qualifying match. Sucks, though. Because Frank is a douche. I laughed so hard when he said he lost his teeth. Wished Dollar got his ass kicked, too. Kid annoys me more than Junie ever did.
M@TT- May 7, 2009 at 10:21 am
Anyone else see Frank -vs- KO Boy II in the finale???
cziken- May 7, 2009 at 10:12 am
Hahahaha :D
Aenarion- May 7, 2009 at 9:50 am
Bad teeth... nothing ironic about that happening on a show with Brits.
LoneWolf- May 7, 2009 at 9:48 am
I'm surprised that no one said anything else to Bisping, that's really no excuse for missing a BS, and I thought he sounded like he was getting done binging the night before all raspy and crap when he was apologizing.

All in all great episode.....It was awesome seeing Cameron win....pretty impressive, first hes all scared, and then after the first punch thrown it was all biz and chocking fools out 1.5 mins later.

@ Sarah

P.S: Frank sux, that other dude should have been on the show...but he sux as well for knocking his own dumbass out.
DDJ- May 7, 2009 at 9:46 am
Frank was one of the sloppiest fighters I have ever seen on TUF. His technique looked awful and most of the fight he was just using his strength advantage to get himself out of shitty situations. I would have liked to have seen the tourette's guy instead of Frank Lester.
Anonymous- May 7, 2009 at 9:31 am
no fucking way i believe he just overslept due to jetlag. was he the only englishman there? sure he wasn't sleeping in a house with many people, but i guarantee his phone rang off the hook, and he didn't wake up to answer it? if it was 3am and he knew he wasn't able to sleep, and knew he'd have trouble waking as a result, did they not have sleeping pills at the pharmacy? he's covering up. and why did the jetlag suddenly hit him on the 3rd fight? he made it ok on the first two. how long does it take someone to get used to a country's clock? his jetlag gets worse over time? FISHY. all i feel confident on is it had something to do with a GREAT time in vegas the night before.
Darwin- May 7, 2009 at 8:57 am
Frank didn't deserve to be there, ugh.

Yay for subs !
TheFeniX- May 7, 2009 at 8:57 am
"Get that tooth on ice."

I almost shit myself laughing at that one. But, hey, it was a good night for Mazagatti. We all know he goes home sad unless someone gets killed or maimed. 1 out of 2 ain't bad.

Seriously though, "get that tooth on ice" is now my new catch phrase.
mayhem420- May 7, 2009 at 8:19 am
@sarah - and we have a winner!!!
sarah- May 7, 2009 at 8:08 am
strongest wrestler on the UK team?

isn't that like being the prettiest girl at fat camp?
MMA Lawyer- May 7, 2009 at 8:06 am
It seems like whoever produces the show listened to the criticism and made good changes to the format. Two fights means less screen time for squabbling at the house and more time for fight preparation and, of course, actual fighting. I hope they keep it up.
FreddyFangers- May 7, 2009 at 7:59 am
"head through a window" - not hand, check those ears out. Pretty much the whole american team seems to be monster douchebags. And I am slowly starting to want Bisping dead again.
My Fight Wiffa Cheeto- May 7, 2009 at 7:56 am
Frank said Wilks was "a pussy on his feet."

Not to mention they both sucked something fierce.
Robot- May 7, 2009 at 7:50 am
no mention to the classic moment of Dollar missing the trainer during punching drills?
polish- May 7, 2009 at 7:49 am
Yes it is ironic.

Yes they were talking about Stapes like Bill Brasky.

Yes I enjoyed watching Frank get beat up by the Brit because he is a douche.

Yes I think it's hilarious Cameron beat Stapes and he was terrified the whole time it seemed.
KingAL- May 7, 2009 at 7:46 am
Good stuff