Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?

Video Evidence: Dan Quinn vs. Aaron Brink

(We’ll always have South Bend. VidProps:
YouTube/Marijuana Muscle)

Well, for once it turned out Dan Quinn wasn’t just bullshitting us. The World’s Most Craziest Man really did fight UFC vet and former reality TV star Aaron Brink in some kind of bizarre-o “striking only” bout last night. Not to ruin it for you, but the results are sadly predictable for anyone who knows,  in general, what a bad idea it is to sanction a fight featuring A) A crazy man or B) A guy who just got out of jail. In this case, Dan Quinn falls into both categories. (Ed. Note: Somewhere in the bowels of the San Diego lock-up, I hope you’re paying attention, War Machine. This is your future.)

Perhaps the California State Athletic Commission has some kind of minimum required amount of mental illness that must be present in the cage at all times, because some genius opted to let our man Sensei Cecil referee this bad boy. Homey plays it pretty straight during the first round, but then breaks out his patented karate chop to begin round two.  If you don’t want  further spoilers, don’t follow the jump until after you’ve watched the “fight.”

More than anything, this video underscores what a slow and painful death it is to work the corner of a fighter who simply won’t follow your instructions. You can sit there and yell, “Your strikes, Dan! Throw combos! Right now!” all you want, but the sad truth is that Dan just isn’t going to throw those combos. Not right now, not ever. He might sling some wild punches in the general vicinity of Brink’s face a few times, but mostly he’s going to cover up and wait for Brink to pin him against the cage and knee him in the gut.

True to form, there seems to be some confusion about how and when this fight is supposed to end as well. After Quinn is knocked down and clearly finished early in the second, it looks for a little while like Peoples might let him continue. Then the “doctor” – we’re putting that in quotes because we assume no legitimate physician would ever be associated with some sad shit like this – enters the cage and has a look. Shortly thereafter, the “ref” – quotes self-explanatory – waves it off.

Not sure how this loss is going to affect Dan Quinn’s main thesis about his fighting career: That he could have been one of the greats if only promoters had given him a chance and pussies would’ve stood up with him and fought him like a man. Best guess: Not at all. Chalk this one up to an off night, we’re thinking. For whatver reason, Quinn just doesn’t seem to be his Stevia-snorting self in there, though he does appear to snarf down a big spoonful of it between rounds.

If only someone would produce a lengthy and rambling YouTube video to let us know exactly what went wrong here …

Cagepotato Comments

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jamesmedley- September 30, 2011 at 4:19 am
Salutations for Pad decreasing to So Cal to corner Serta with this fight. Serta had another Gladiator’s veteran also assist in his corner who he'd just met that evening. More video of Serta starting to warm up smoking and snorting stevia inside a couple of days. Champion to Aaron Edge for any great return fight. Aaron Edge is really a very long time MMA veteran that has very heavy hands. You are able to feel Brink’s punches relaxing in.....
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fatbellyfrank- August 21, 2010 at 3:22 pm
Pretty painful to watch, the guy in his corner must be the eternal optimist, hoping Dan would do something, at the moment Dan would get outstruck by a punching bag at training based on that performance, and they looked like Divers slippers, excellent when your on coral reef's &shit, prolly be OK in the cage, but an unusual choice of footwear just the same
MoTropolis- August 21, 2010 at 3:09 pm
Atleast he got to keep his prison slippers when he was released.
Jaye Priest- August 21, 2010 at 2:45 pm
@Mediumrare-----That list is hilarious dude...............
Ballkick- August 21, 2010 at 1:15 pm
I have witnessed better amateur fights with better skill sets than this. I would put my best 155lb fighter against this waste of skin. Fucking sad!......Very sad indeed.
Dan, fore go the fight game and start selling Stevia over the Internet, you obviously should be doing something your good at, and that you are passionate about......and that isn't fighting.
LAS- August 21, 2010 at 12:14 pm
Great list, MediumRare. I would offer a few honorable mentions:

Ken Shamrock - the epitomy of a washed-up, delusional athlete

Paulo Filho - he has a tattoo of a million dollar bill with a pitbull on it, and that's only like the 4th weirdest tattoo on his body; occasionally seen having conversations with his other personalities during fights

Jake Shields - bwahahahahaha
Mr_Misanthropy- August 21, 2010 at 12:11 pm
Does this mean crystal meth is mightier than stevia? Like if you are playing heroin, stevia, crystal meth heroin beats meth, meth beats stevia, stevia beats heroin? I'm going to go do some research with my pals and I'll get back to you guys...

@ Komodo Or 64

He said "blazin' handspeed", you know, like after you take a 1 gram binger to the dome and then bust out your awesome combos in front of the mirror in your bedroom at your mom's house.
MediumRare- August 21, 2010 at 11:53 am
Pound-for-Pound top ten most entertaining personalities in MMA:

1. Mumbles Toney - thx James for illustrating the term "punch drunk"
2. Tito Ortiz - head=ego=wife's vagina, verbal skills of an orangutan
3. Dan Quinn - snorts stevia, eats weed butter before fights
4. War Machine - blogs from prison
5. Diego Sanchez - does Yes cartwheels and hangs out with DQ
6. Nick Diaz - keeps it real, homie
7. Dana White - thinks he can stop the internet
8. Junie Browning - pisses excellence
9. Tim Sylvia - won't stop fighting
10. Jose Canseco - won't stop being a douche

El Guapo- August 21, 2010 at 11:44 am
"Aye, mhen, tell you like this. Cold fission only works with cold water, mhen. I don't work out and eat like a pig, but you give me a spoonful of stevia and some cold water and I'll give you BAM! You like that? Have some more, mhen. Bam! Bam! Boom, down he goes. Tell you like this, that wasn't cold water they gave me. It was warm, mhen. No can do. Can't make cold fission with warm water, mhen."
Fried Taco- August 21, 2010 at 11:42 am
I'd fight him, but there's always a slight chance I'd lose (especially with Cecil Peoples on his side), and I couldn't live with that. But just to psych him out, I'd eat a spoonful of sugar in between rounds. Of course, I'd be taking him down and finishing with a choke. I'm betting he won't tap!
Smitty- August 21, 2010 at 10:44 am
As crazy as he is, I still love the fact that he's at least gettin in the ring. That shit trips me out!
AdamTerminus- August 21, 2010 at 10:34 am
Dan Quinn: Too weird to live, too rare to die. I impatiently await his vid response. He is my kind of crazy.
ccman- August 21, 2010 at 10:22 am
At least he gave a job for a day to the guys down at the shelter cornering him.

Seriously how fucked up do you have to be to even consider working this corner?
Komodo- August 21, 2010 at 9:52 am
Blazing Handspeed™ fast we missed it.
Mdot50- August 21, 2010 at 9:14 am
His downfall here was obviously the aqua socks.
evilsaywhat- August 21, 2010 at 9:08 am
Was that a spoonful of stevia between rounds?
MediumRare- August 21, 2010 at 9:00 am
@ Bob

I can answer that question. Dan Quinn is top ten pound-for-pound most entertaining personalities associated with MMA. He mixes an exquisite blend of delusion, self-absorption and drug addiction.

Who else is going to promote the benefits of eating weed butter and snorting stevia before a fight?

Anyone want to have a shot at the top ten rankings for pound-for-pound most entertaining (read bat shit insane) personalities associated with MMA?
blackboxmma- August 21, 2010 at 9:00 am
nice aqua socks
rlh61- August 21, 2010 at 8:56 am
Bob's the train-wreck know what' s coming, but you can't look away. For further proof, see War Machine...
MediumRare- August 21, 2010 at 8:55 am
Too much weed butter before the fight?
Bob Reilly- August 21, 2010 at 8:44 am
Just a question, why do you give this guy so much attention?
Dante- August 21, 2010 at 8:43 am
That's funny because Dan Quinn is usually always throwing big combos, in the fight of his life... at being the WORST human being EVER!