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Videos: Tito Ortiz Douchebag Quote of the Day, Brock Lesnar’s Caveman Training

(Props: FightHype via MMA Fanhouse)


"I was wrestling with Cris Cyborg, and she’s a tough chick, man — for a girl I expected her not to be so damn tough — and we were just wrestling around and I went for a guillotine, and she slipped out of it, and when she slipped out of it I traded off to a triangle, and I locked the triangle and she went to go pick me up and slam me, she picked me up and slammed me on the ground, and I had no pain, nothin’. I ended up choking her, but at the same time it was just a factor of one of those little small things that I notice like, ‘I’m good, I’m ready to do this and start working,’ but I feel great, man, I feel really good."

Good to hear it, Tito. If you didn’t end up choking out that 145-pound woman we would have thought you were a pussy or something…

After the jump: Brock Lesnar endures the notoriously brutal strength and conditioning training at Athletic Performance Inc. in Minneapolis. This might be your only chance to see what Lesnar looks like when he’s completely broken down and exhausted. Brock’s post-workout nutrition plan? Burgers and waffle-fries, bitch.


Cagepotato Comments

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Beatingu- September 12, 2009 at 11:15 pm
I hate Brock Lesnar. Brock Lesnar is going to kill someone inside the octagon....
StRyKeR- September 12, 2009 at 7:24 pm
Cool Cool man
AgentoftheBat- September 12, 2009 at 3:43 pm
Brocks workout is like Drago's from Rocky 4, but with less red lighting and computers with Atari 2600 graphics.
BigBear145- September 12, 2009 at 2:35 pm
The yellow drink is (thank god) not machida pee, its actually this super crammed electrolyte drink that tast like absolute garbage. Most wrestlers have a 8 oz glass of it as a way to recover but not take on too much wieght.... leave it to brock to drink it by the gallon.... that man is a monster.
Ed M- September 12, 2009 at 10:40 am
Cyborg picked Tito up and slammed him to get out of a triangle? What a fuckin BEAST. How heavy do you think Tito's noggin weighs?
ajadoniz- September 12, 2009 at 7:11 am
is it more sexist to choke out a woman or complain that they deserve different treatment in the gym?
I Hate Bisping- September 11, 2009 at 8:31 pm
So if Coleman smacks the dick out of Jennas mouth and back in Tito's ass, will Tito be able to headline an event in Mexico City on 2010? Do you teach your son to impregnate a Whoooer?
Bob Loblaw- September 11, 2009 at 4:52 pm
Was that Rachelle Leah in the Brock vid?
Rich S.- September 11, 2009 at 4:32 pm
How many times can you say the word "factor" in ONE video.. sheesh..
rockhuddy- September 11, 2009 at 3:36 pm
Jesus Christ, Lesnar is invincible
Dubbayoo- September 11, 2009 at 3:15 pm
Jenna ain't choked on anything..ever..
tallkitchenbags- September 11, 2009 at 2:59 pm
carwin is a dead man walking.
Sheps- September 11, 2009 at 2:58 pm
Glad to see the Tito boycott is still going strong.
Slag- September 11, 2009 at 2:33 pm
"A fighter based, fan friend fighter."

If Tito's fighting ability was half as strong as his ability to butcher the English language, he would be champion of the universe.
Soda Popinski- September 11, 2009 at 2:23 pm
DUDE!! JUGGER!!! I cant believe you brought that up. To this day dude, that is the all time scariest thing to me in any movie ever made. Im 26 years old and still have to force myself to keep my eyes on the screen when Im in a crowded room watching the movie, just to not look like a pansy.

"YOU'LL NEVER GET OUT OF BED AGAIN!!!!!!"-freaking terrifying.
Jugger- September 11, 2009 at 1:57 pm
I read the Tito quote, then hit 'play' on the video... But then I chickened out and paused it. I can't bring myself to watch "the one who shan't be named".

Watching these videos of Tito reminds me of watching scenes of Zelda in Pet Cemetery as a child. "Rachel! Rachel!" and I'd run and hide behind the couch. September 11, 2009 at 1:56 pm
its great to have Tito back, and yes lets bring the UFC to Mexico!!!
just some dong- September 11, 2009 at 1:56 pm
What's that mysterious yellow substance Brock's chugging at the 7:45 mark?

Could it be...?

UFC fan- September 11, 2009 at 1:48 pm
I wish Tito woulda slapped the shit out of mr " cool-cool".
I couldn't get anywhere close to finishing that fucking video cause of "cool-cool".
I do wish they had video of Tito choking out cyborg, sadly later on in the shower she got revenge when she showed Tito that her cock was bigger than his.
baldmidget- September 11, 2009 at 1:38 pm
hopefully brock is ready for ufc 91.