(If you’re into easily digestible religious platitudes and being able to express your entire worldview on a bumper sticker, Belfort is pretty much your guy. PicProps: Urdirt.com)
Look, nobody would blame Vitor Belfort if he’s a little pissed off right now. Dude has been trying to get Anderson Silva in the cage with him since January, but owing to the middleweight champion’s ongoing frailty, fights scheduled for UFC 108, UFC 109 and UFC 112 have all had to be postponed. Now, due to the world’s most unexpected beatdown at the hands of Chael Sonnen and yet another injury to Silva, Belfort will instead accept a dangerous (and, frankly, thankless) fight against Yushin Okami in Germany at UFC 122 in November.
A lesser man – or perhaps a man who isn’t married to a Brazilian Playboy model and therefore can’t already consider his life an earth-shaking fucking success – might think this was a raw deal. He might stew over it, maybe go on Tapout Radio and say some crazy shit about it, but not Vitor Belfort. As he explained on Thursday during an appearance on Ariel Helwani’s “The MMA Hour,” Belfort doesn’t get mad, he gets Jesus.
"You know what I’m expecting?” he said, when asked if he thought a win over Okami would earn him a title fight. “I’m expect Jesus, bro, every day. I’m expecting Jesus to come into my life and choose my path. Whatever out there is good for me."
Sure, it may not have quite the same ring to it as “How’s taste my pee-pee-pee,” but I have the feeling Vitor Belfort may have just inadvertently designed one of those little rubber bracelets that people wear to advertise their beliefs to the rest of the world.
In fact, this is a great example of how letting the Big Man Upstairs take the reins of your life can be a great stress-reducer. It’s also an example of how trusting only in God can allow your employer to talk you into taking that bullshit assignment that no one else wanted.
But I guess that’s not the glass-half-full way of looking at it … UFC 122 is probably going to be awesome. You know, the event also rumored to feature such crowd pleasers as Krzysztof Soszynski vs. Amir Sadollah vs. Peter Sobotta and Jason Brilz vs. Vladimir Matyushenko? The one going down in some place called Oberhausen, which Wikipedia informs us is roughly the same size as Reno, Nevada and Spokane, Washington? The one in the country that is so hostile to MMA that it won’t show the sport on TV and won’t let minors in the door? The one that’s going to air in America on SpikeTV via tape delay? Yeah, that’s the one. What’s not to like?
Nonetheless, Belfort sees only the silver lining here, so much so that he sounds like he’s reading aloud from a Mitch Albom book when he talks about it.
"In life you always have two choices to make," Belfort said. "You either live bitter (like Antonio McKee) , angry (like Brock Lesnar) or you live in a happy life, you enjoy it. So I try to always see a positive on that. So whatever is what’s the best. I’m not disappointed. I have to take it … I just have to learn how to take things in my life because so many things happen in my life that wasn’t the way that was supposed to be. But I just learn a lesson. You just have to see things in a different perspective."
(Ed. Note: Fine, I added the stuff about McKee and Lesnar, but you get the picture …)