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War Machine Makes Twitter Rape Jokes, Bellator Gives Him A Not-So-Stern Talking To


(Posting this image alone seems inappropriate enough given the “context” of this article, but we’ll get to that in a minute.) 

The man formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver but now spoken only of in terrified whispers as “War Machine” just can’t stop making himself look like an absolute dipshit. Or won’t stop.

The twice imprisoned Bellator welterweight has been fired in the past for making his insane thoughts public, to the point that he is currently the face of the “Think Twice, Then Type” campaign on the social networking site. His most recent remark, also on Twitter, may be his worst to date. However, it does not appear that his employer cares in the slightest.

Just raped @ChristyMack She tried to make me wait until “after errands” As if! =p” War Machine tweeted August 10th.

Christy Mack, of course, is his adult film actress girlfriend.

Koppenhaver went on to declare that, “Real men rape. (Their GF’s and wives, not strangers, don’t get your panties in a bunch.)” Yes, Mr. Machine, let us not jump to conclusions when judging your moral turpitude.

As one would expect, Machine’s latest musings were not received without criticism. Thankfully, we can all rest assured knowing that Machine’s thoughts — which he typed himself, mind you — were taken out of context.

“Apparently you idiots didn’t read my tweet prior to the one y’all are crying about, it puts it in the right context. Sensitive ass bitches,” he scribed, likely while wearing an ascot and smoking a corncob pipe. “Context is the word…y’all motherfuckers just love to take what I say out of CONTEXT and then attempt to demonize me with it. #DIESLOW.”

Without coming off as the PC police, I think we can all agree that War Machine’s rant crossed a line. What intrigues us most, however, is the correlation between Twitter, MMA and rape jokes. I mean, there’s obviously some hidden connection there, but why exactly? Is there something about only having 150 characters to express oneself that makes MMA fighters want to assert themselves sexually by force? Details at 11.

Shortly after, however, War Machine became enlightened and issued a heartfelt tweetology, “I tweeted something earlier that was stupid, insensitive and wrong. Rape is never something to joke about ever. I sincerely apologize.”

Listen, I like Jon. Or at least the guy named Jon I briefly interviewed years ago shortly after his season of The Ultimate Fighter. *Jon* seemed earnest and courageously spoke openly about his psychological and emotional issues, as well as the help he was seeking for them.War Machine, on the other hand, needs to get a hold of himself and perhaps cancel his Twitter account. He’s a talented and skilled fighter but may be close to once again having his livelihood threatened by stuff he says or does outside of the ring.

Or not. Bellator CEO Bjorn Rebney issued a long-winded statement that amounted to a whole lot of nothing regarding his organization’s stance on its fighters being insensitive about rape in response. “I agree with those who found Jon’s earlier statement to be offensive and inappropriate,” the statement began.

And, while his public apology surely does not excuse his statement, it does evidence his recognition of the seriousness of the situation and his realization that what he said was offensive, ignorant and hurtful. Since the day I entered this business, I’ve believed that my job was to treat our fighters like human beings and not like property. Human beings make mistakes and sometimes say stupid things. I’m surely prepared to take action in warranted situations as evidenced by recent promotional contracts we have terminated with well-known, popular fighters who have committed assault and/or who have broken the law. But, in this situation, I remain hopeful that Jon will learn from his mistake, redeem himself and become a better man for it and I would like to give him that chance.

We probably shouldn’t be surprised that Bellator isn’t even appearing to try to dissuade its fighters from saying and doing reprehensible things via actual forms of punishment. After all, they signed Brett Rogers. And nothing short of smacking a woman at a gas station will get you released from your contract over there.

I’m not calling for Machine’s release but goodness, Bjorn, would it be too much trouble to do or say anything of consequence that might make it seem like Bellator does not let its fighters, especially those with violent criminal pasts, say this type of thing publicly? YOU’RE MAKING US ALL LOOK LIKE ASSHOLES.

- Elias Cepeda

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Fried Taco- August 14, 2013 at 9:13 am
Me - "Hey War, remember in prison the special time after lunch and dinner? That's what rape is."

War - "Oh, I better issue an apology then."
Jack44- August 14, 2013 at 3:26 am
If you think Christopher`s story is impressive..., three weeks-ago mom in-law actually earned $7007 working from there apartment and they're best friend's sister`s neighbour was doing this for 6 months and earnt more than $7007 part-time from their mac. applie the instructions on this link. http://www.jobs76.com
DARKHORSE06- August 13, 2013 at 1:30 pm
And that War Machine is the reason you will always live in an apartment.
El Guapo- August 13, 2013 at 12:12 pm
I'm saving my good material for Shunick's follow up piece, "Rape Is Bad for Women, Children and Trannies Alike"
fedorlicious- August 13, 2013 at 10:15 am
I hate eating glass, nice.
mookiestick- August 13, 2013 at 9:12 am
This guy is definately not Isaac Newton. I'm not surprised by his comments. Let's be honest here. There aren't too many smart fighters. Half don't know what the Internet is and I don't think Twitter sensitivity training would help them much. About 75% of these guys were headed for jail to begin with. Some will probably still head in that direction.
Mr_Misanthropy- August 12, 2013 at 8:48 pm
Masheen gets a pass on rape jokes. He learned all about it in the pokey.

He should also get a pass on abortion jokes because his Mom always told him about the botched one she got when she found out she was pregnant with him.
teep- August 12, 2013 at 6:08 pm
You are right Elias. When men go on and on about rape and abortion publicly, they look like assholes. Rape and abortion do not usually happen to men so their jokes or telling women that abortion is bad, really has no bearing on anything. I am not for sure that anyone really listens to what "Jon" says though. But you have a great point about how something like this groups us men into the asshole category. Maybe Matt Hughes can give Jon some sensitivity training.
Get Off Me- August 12, 2013 at 6:04 pm
He's just pissed that strangers are calling him MACK
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