Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?


Some of you will look at the above image and start doing joyous cartwheels around the room. Some of you will just see a poster for a local MMA card held at a county fair and say “I don’t get it.” And that’s because you haven’t been introduced to the prophetic glory of Dan Quinn.

For the unfamiliar, Quinn is a 4-4-1 professional fighter who’s had the dual honors of being choked out by Frank Mir and going three rounds with Jason Lambert. As a linebacker at Notre Dame, he once picked Iron Head Heywood out of the air at fourth and inches; it was, in Quinn’s estimation, the greatest stop in college football history. (Quinn was later kicked off the team amid allegations of sexual assault.) He once knocked out five men in one night at Juanita’s in Encinitas, California. He’s discovered the secret of weight loss and tumor-melting, via Stevia and cold fission. And oh yeah, he’s preparing for his first fight since a January ’05 TKO loss to Dan Molina, and will be facing Dave Huckaba, who has knocked out Bo Cantrell twice, once in 26 seconds and once in five seconds.

But those are just facts, and statistics, and they don’t really tell the story of a man. To understand who Dan Quinn really is, you’ll have to watch his shirtless mirror-rants on YouTube.

This is how Quinn first came to our attention — a passionate call-out of Kimbo Slice in what appears to be a public bathroom, where Quinn predicts that if he and Kimbo were to ever share a prison cell, Kimbo would be the bitch; he also vows to become the richest motherfucker on the planet thanks to discovering the fountain of youth, promises Kimbo financial freedom as soon as the money starts rolling in, and fantasizes about sex with reporters.

Here’s Quinn revealing that he’s actually the angel Maitreya, a prophet sent to use cold fission and Stevia to end slavery forever; he gives us a glimpse of his pure H20 process; makes the wild claim that the Bad Boy Club logo was based on him; reminisces about how he regularly used to put Scott Smith on queer street; and talks us through the aspartame/bird flu connection.

Possibly the most important Quinn video of all: Our hero tells us about the childhood trauma that made him what he is today, and details the events that led up to him being in front of a mirror, talking to the Internet. It’s the Superhero origin story, so to speak. He also describes how Stevia melted 62 pounds and six tumors from his uncle’s body, and calls out Dana White, vowing to beat him to death.

And here’s his latest missive, posted yesterday, in which Quinn reveals that having women watch him fight gives him the power to finish any man with body shots, describes the matriarchal history of Earth, and sheds a little light on the assassination of Ernest Hemingway. (What, you thought it was a suicide? Please.)

You can watch the rest of Quinn’s video work here. He truly is a “Poet Warrior,” and we wish him the best against Huckaba on August 13th.

And Quinn, if you’re reading this, don’t be a stranger…holler and we’ll do an interview.

Also: If you liked this article, Digg it.

Cagepotato Comments

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harleygirl- December 8, 2009 at 3:11 pm
LOL!!! Oh dear God....just hearing his voice makes my skin crawl! You think this guy is bad on the internet....try living with him! He rented a room from me a few years back...Believe it or not, when he came for the room "interview" he seemed like a fairly intelligent, easy going father going through some hard times due to his divorce. Day after day after he moved in, I saw this progression of him going from fairly normal to the most bizarre behavior Ive ever seen in a person. My friends were all convinced that he was a doper, but I never saw any signs of that. I think he is just down right flippen wacked!!! He used to follow me around the house non-stop just rambling NON STOP with that most intense garble Ive ever heard!

After he moved out, I made the mistake of hanging out with him one afternoon. Not sure what he stuck in my drink, but I became almost delerious after drinking it. I was so dizzy and sick and had no choice but to walk home given that I knew there was no way I could drive. He kept trying to get me to just go lie down on the bed but thank god I was aware enough not to do that after reading what somewhat wrote about him being accused of some sexual charges. When I got home, I was vomiting so bad that my friend came over to look after me. She even called him up just to beg him to tell her what he had given me so that she could decide if I needed to go to the hospital or not...Well, for 6 months after that, he stalked my house, called my phone nonstop you name it....telling me to watch my children, watch my back and you don't just accuse someone of drugging you and live to tell about it....

I was ready to file a restraining order against him when luckily he moved away! I feel sorry for his boys. I couldn't imagine having a father for such a nut case....

Oh and ladies...beware....I hear he's quite the Romeo! Trust me, I had to hear non stop about how good in bed he was and the ladies were always begging for more. Funny thing though...we lived together for several months and not once did I see him bring anyone around!
Komodo- May 30, 2009 at 5:10 pm
La La Land...
Anonymous- April 11, 2009 at 11:39 am
lol war quinn fucke is nuts but its so damn funny
darkman- March 23, 2009 at 8:18 am
I am with you mighty Quinn. Let me know what I can do to help. I just mixed my first batch. Mentally, I can feel it. I'll let you how well it works after my jog.
Anonymous- July 25, 2008 at 10:56 pm
I knew Dan Quinn in college. He had a ton of athletic potential, but was clearly a person with some personal internal demons that got him in trouble and led him further and further away from people who could help him. The only good thing that could come from this is if it results in some help for the guy finding something or someone who can help him. Mental illiness should not be our entertainment.
curious- July 19, 2008 at 5:11 am
yes but they dont guarantee fighters on cards they pull out all the time for whatever reasons . He had already been replaced after flunking his first med.exam and there is another utube where dan quinn is challenging a totally new fighter now
curious- July 19, 2008 at 5:10 am
unfortunately they dont guarantee fighters on cards they pull out all the time for whatever reasons . He had already been replaced after flunking his first med.exam and there is another utube where dan quinn is challenging a totally new fighter now
Cory- July 18, 2008 at 6:18 pm
If the fight isnt on then Gladiator Challenge will have to give ALOT of refunds or face being sued for FALSE ADVERTISEMENT.

If Dan Quinn ISNT on the card, NOONE GOES.

Dan Quinn passed his second Medical, they BETTER let him fight!
curious- July 17, 2008 at 4:37 pm
So just curious as to how many Quinn followers actually bought tickets to the fight he has been pulled from? And why do people still keep talking about it like its on .
Cory- July 16, 2008 at 11:16 pm
Know this

Dan Quinn stumbled upon the "sweet Cure" and rather than giving him the respect he deserves their is alot of haters out there.

Dan Quinn at 41 is in better shape than most men at 25. He will KO Huckaba if Huckaba will stand Toe To Toe with him on Aug.13th like a man (And like he said he would)

Look for their to be a new champion and his name is Dan Quinn..

If you don't like it you are probably just a fucking maggot anyways.
curious- July 15, 2008 at 9:10 pm
Hey BMF whered you get your facts from? Are you sure they are ALL true and can you back them up? Especially the comments about huckaba
Cory- July 15, 2008 at 4:33 pm
the "Bad Boy Club" image was made after Dan Quinn after he knocked out 5 motherfuckers at Juanita's in Encitas.

Ask "Boogaloo"!

Now go to youtube, wait.. keep your ears open and soon you will be given further instructions!

BAM MOTHERFUCKER- July 15, 2008 at 2:06 pm
Facts speak for them self. here are facts, true statements, no bull shit, TOE TO TOE!

1. Dan Quinn fought frank Mir.

2. Hucklebuck fought alot of bums at fairgrounds.

3. Dan Quinn played football at Notre Dame.

4. Huckleberry never graduated high school, let alone attended college.

5. Dan Quinn is a Golden Gloves CHAMPION!

6. Hoobastank is a unskilled romo.

7. Dan Quinn is dating a 9.5 hottie 20-something.

8. Huckabee is banging a Thai Tranny.


Firehawk222- July 13, 2008 at 6:22 pm
The Bad Boy logo, was in fact created in the image of Joey Carter, not Quinn. This can be confirmed by the original owners of the Life's a Beach corporation.
Cory- July 12, 2008 at 12:32 am
(To above poster)

You can't handle the truth bro?

Wait until Maitreya wins the title than you will know who the fucking "Bad Boy" really is motherfucker!

CityBoxingSanDiego- July 11, 2008 at 8:00 pm
(reads above post) Oh sweet Jesus, Mary, and Joeseph....
Cory- July 11, 2008 at 6:33 pm
What is sad is DAN QUINN will DESTROY Huckaba despite what all you HATERS think.. Also, Dan has NEVER taken ANY other drugs other than Marijuana which he has a medical liscence to have
his record is 4-4-1 BUT those fights were BEFORE Stevia,

so I say this.. To Dana White and Fight Fans across the nation.. That little 8 year old boy who Fred Reeva husband of Dorris Reeva tied to a tree like Jesus for 4 hours because his TRUE COLORS came out when he had too much to drink grew up to be a STUD at Notre Dame.. He stopped Iron Head Heayward at GROUND ZERO..

Than when they demoted him to the 4th team he took up Boxing.. and he won a few fights to feed the homeless and hungry, and on that poster he has with his hand raised the maker of the "Bad Boy Club" used his picture for the symbol..

Than he punched out 4 guys at Juanitas.. and one fucker from NY who thought he was a ladies man..


He is the Angel Nytraia who has discovered Stevia+Water+Energy equals pure H20 or Split H20 and is Cold Fission..

He can also put on his resume that he made a woman who NEVER had an orgasm in her life have 100 orgasms in 2 hours with his "Violin" technique where he licks on the clitoris like a flute.. It doesnt work on all girls, but he is willing to find out who it DOES work on..

Im going to ride his coattails to richness because of his discovery and what he is willing to prove with his hands..
Rob- July 8, 2008 at 1:12 am
Tim- July 7, 2008 at 8:10 pm
It looks like he's all coked-out in this video. Sweaty, sniffling, loud, it all fits.
farmer- July 5, 2008 at 9:28 pm
I know Quinn, you people will see come the 16th. Yes, he's loopy, but he HAS knocked out Scot Smith.
shtzscrzy- July 1, 2008 at 5:56 am
This dude is nothing but a 3 ring circus hes fighting at a fair for a reason ,he sucks , hes only getting 750 for his fight of which hes giving up what 90 percent to feed the homeless or whatever. He aint gonna have shit left. And Fighting this dude he is nothing but a can. How can you even be proud to beat down a dude whos already ill , like kicking a crazy old mans ass
carpetMuncher- June 29, 2008 at 1:50 pm
KIMBO would fucking w0rk this guy....
pufonthis- June 28, 2008 at 2:53 am
Because if you don't watch it the day he posts it, it's any less funny?
THANKS- June 27, 2008 at 9:27 pm
Bob Johnson- June 27, 2008 at 9:02 pm
He's telling the truth guys I was all down and out, now I'm chasing pussy.