Steroids in MMA
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“Where Are They Now?”: Famous Victims Edition

Eddy Bengtsson

What (most of us) know him for: Unquestionably the most embarrassing loss on our list, Eddy Bengtsson is the man who became infamous for being “knocked out” via Ghost Punch by Aleksander Emelianenko. Like a scene from The Sixth Man(yes, I went there) Aleksander seemed to summon the power of the unbeknownst third Emelianenko brother to knock out Bengtsson less than a minute into their fight, despite completely missing the punch that did so.

What he’s been up to: Even before Eddy could see a replay of exactly how pathetic the fight was, he saved himself the embarrassment of ever having to explain himself again by immediately retiring after the fight. Like…in the locker room. Check out his explanation of just what the hell happened. Among other things, Bengtsson states that he believes Aleks will have a great career in the future, proving that the punch must have somehow done massive damage to his brain.

Where he is now: Well apparently his retirement lasted just a few months longer than Jamie Varner‘s, as Bengtsson returned to the ring in May of this year to score a 50 second kimura win over Istvan Kalmar.

David Gardner

What (most of us) know him for: Performing a move so dumb in his match against Shinya Aoki that Bas Rutten declared, “He cannot sleep for three days.” It was a rough three days for Gardner.

What he’s been up to: Kids, take note: If you ever embarrass yourself like David Gardner did, which would be equivalent to getting a raise and then shitting your boss’ desk, please don’t try and market yourself on that failure thereafter, like David Gardner did. Yes, as a result of the incident, which became a viral sensation, Gardner changed his nickname to “Hello Japan,” or a move equivalent to reminding every future job interviewer you sit down with that you indeed shat on your last boss’ desk.

Where he is now: Amidst a 4 fight skid with just two wins coming in his last ten, including losses to UFC veteran Matt Grice and TUF 13 winner Tony Ferguson. You see kids, this is what happens when you try to make your name off of a major personal failure…it leads to many, many more. But hey, at least he’s cool with it.

And that takes us to perhaps the biggest victim of all…

Bob Sapp

What (most of us) know him for: It’s tough to imagine in hindsight, but there was actually a time when Bob “The Beast” Sapp made people piss themselves in fear instead of unintentional laughter. We’re talking about a man who managed to defeat the legendary Ernesto Hoost twice in K1 competition, despite lacking the ability to throw a proper punch or kick whatsoever. He even managed to nearly piledrive “Minotauro” through the PRIDE ring for Christ’s sake. But it was Sapp’s face off against Croatian striker Mirko Cro Cop that would truly make him famous, despite his exhausting attempts to do so through other mediums. A little over a minute into the fight, Mirko caught Sapp with a straight left that shattered his zygomatic bone, but it was his reaction to the punch that would forever make his nickname a thing of irony. Rather than falling to the mat like a normal person might, Sapp slowly, limply, laid down on the mat and went into a series of winces and convulsions that would become known thereafter as “crygasming.”

What he’s been up to: The loss to Cro Cop was really the beginning of the end for Sapp. His gong-and-rush tactics quickly became a thing of parody, and aside from a few wins in freak show fights, Sapp would become a punching bag for the likes of Bobby Lashley, Rameau Thierry Sokoudjou, and famed giant killer Minowaman. But hey, he was in the remake of The Longest Yard that everyone loved. Right? Right? Guys?

Where he is now: Currently on an 0-9 run in kickboxing competition and a 1-5 run in MMA, Sapp was scheduled to fight at K1 Dynamite!! 2010 on New Year’s Eve against Shinichi Suzukawa in a Pancrase style match. But after claiming to be shorted $15,000 by the promotion, Sapp would pull out the day of the event, leading FEG President Sadaharu Tanikawa to label him, “the worst, most lamentable dust man,” and someone who, “should not be considered a normal person.” Sad…but probably true.

Next time, we check up on a few legends of the sport, look down from our high chairs, and laugh at how far they’ve fallen.


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J-Dog- November 5, 2011 at 1:39 pm
is the site fucked up for anyone else? There's a huge black blob that covers most of the posts... I think it's part of the Showtime boxing ad. It's been jacked up for me for the past few days. This sucks.
xinshi- November 4, 2011 at 2:01 am
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de l'autre la queue grub.Crane Prairie sons de basses sont importants pour l'Oregon standards.The principaux bass pris par voie de l'auteur a été 6,5 fat.He excès poss

ède vu Largemouth coincé et a publié plus de 8 kilos en plus tournaments.These basses sonores locales ne sont certainement pas votre course commune en plus des

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habituellement fraient dans les frais généraux corps céleste en pleine souffrance et June.Spawn De plus après spawn est habituellement quand un poisson "de commencer à

aider les mordre" pour l'utilisateur moyen et à tout le monde peut capturer plusieurs petits mâles qui piquent boldy.After le frai en particulier chute de la basse

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une énorme bouche son de basse sur Crane Prairie Reservoir.
Crazy Croat- November 4, 2011 at 12:39 am
@Todd M - grrr, the civil war is misinterpretation but i know what you mean ;)
Todd M- November 3, 2011 at 10:31 pm
@ Crazy Croat, after the whooping he got from Mirko I would have thought fighting a Croat would be the last thing on his mind, WAR Croatia, just not the civil kind.
BabcockdaSolution- November 3, 2011 at 1:55 pm
The site just keeps getting worse and was the liver kick that mad Sapp crumple not a punch to the face stupid.
MMAposeur- November 3, 2011 at 10:55 am
Saw the post title and immediately thought of Sean Salmon. Did he even live through Sugar's head-kick?
Crazy Croat- November 3, 2011 at 6:06 am
I know excactly where Bob Sapp is now – on december 16th he’s in my town Dubrovnik, Croatia fighting the guy i personally know called Maro Perak
Crazy Croat- November 3, 2011 at 6:05 am
I know excactly where Bob Sapp is no - on december 16th he's in my town Dubrovnik, Croatia fighting the guy i personally know called Maro Perak
Motivated Penn- November 3, 2011 at 1:14 am
Bob Sapp is pretty bad, but "lamentable dust man"? Come on son, that's unfair.
Todd M- November 2, 2011 at 9:49 pm
Lol @ the female commentators they get in K1, they always sound like they are being finger banged under the desk.
AlFyiavb- November 2, 2011 at 8:00 pm
Hey, what about Jeremy Bullock???
Travis Fulton vs. Jeremy Bullock, Extreme Challenge 22 (11/21/98)

This guy needs to be the first guy on the list.
Crow42- November 2, 2011 at 2:56 pm
Wow didn't know alberto rio used 2 be in MMA
No wonder he uses that arm bar finishers
Bob sapp is trying 2 get in2 a movie he can as a monster without the CGI
Yazloz18- November 2, 2011 at 2:35 pm
Actually Bob Sapp is lying in a dormant volcano under the seas waiting until Mothra comes back trying to wreck Japan
GistoftheFist- November 2, 2011 at 2:34 pm
As i've said before, i'm pretty sure most of us would fall down and cry if Crocop broke our orbital bone. :I