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Why I Could Do Without Shamrock vs. Shamrock

(Ken Shamrock: master of the silly face staredown.)

Frank Shamrock won’t stop talking about how much he wants to fight his older brother. In fact, the older and slower Ken Shamrock becomes, the more Frank seems to want a bout with him. Weird. Now the adopted brothers are telling that the bout is basically a done deal, while the ever-questionable Head of Operations for EliteXC, Jeremy Lappen, sounds more cautious.

The reasons EliteXC will probably end up making this fight are obvious. At least, they’re obvious once you consider the way EliteXC thinks. The fight has a “cool hook,” according to Frank, and that’s more than enough for the people who brought us Kimbo Slice-Tank Abbott. The reasons they might not make it happen? How about a mix of financial concerns and worries over whether Ken will be engaging in any headbutting contests the day of the fight and end up pulling out at the last minute again.

Beyond those obvious risks, here are several other reasons why we can do without Shamrock vs. Shamrock.

1. It’s eight years too late. The time to make this fight was when both guys were at or at least near the top of their game. Frank’s last great moment was his victory over Tito Ortiz in 1999. Since then he’s been reluctant to fight genuinely dangerous opponents, and has usually come out on the losing end when he does. Ken had a good showing in a decision loss against Don Frye in 2002, then started to go downhill shortly after. At this point, what does it matter who wins? Obviously, it will be Frank, but still, so what? It’s meaningless beyond the tepid personal grudge, which brings me to…

2. It’s a contrived gimmick. It’s not that I don’t believe there’s some real animosity between them. Both brothers are naturally gifted at making people hate them, and there’s the issue over who treated their father with appropriate respect and who didn’t. Fine. But when you listen to them talk about it you get a sense that they’re both seeing dollar signs more than a legitimate opportunity to settle their differences. Frank can’t stop talking about what a great “story” he thinks it is, as if he’s talking about some fictional version of his life. At least Ken realizes that gimmicks only work when you pretend that they’re real.

3. The endless Cain and Abel comparisons. It’s already begun. Lappen brought it up in the ESPN article, referring to it as “a storyline everyone can relate to.” That’s fine, but here’s the thing: Cain murdered Abel. They didn’t engage in a big money prizefight as middle-aged men. There’s a difference.

4. Frank Shamrock will never let us hear the end of it. As great as he once was, Frank Shamrock is even greater in his own mind. He’s referred to himself before as the greatest martial artist of the last twenty-five years. And yet, while his sport has blown up in popularity since the turn of the century, he’s competed only sporadically. But if he beats Ken (and he will, if Ken can make it into the cage this time) he’ll never stop talking about it. He’ll be like the friend who once scored the winning touchdown in high school football. We’ll all have to hear about it every time he has four beers in him, and when you go over to his house you better believe he’ll play the tape again and again. You really want to go through that?

5. l know I’ll have to watch it. This is what gets me the most. The fact that if EliteXC makes this fight, I’ll end up watching it despite all the reasons I’ve just given. I’ll watch the same way we all turn our heads to see what’s going on whenever idiots in a bar all start shouting “woooo!” Shamrock vs. Shamrock is the “woooo!” of the MMA world. It’s a quick, look-over-here type maneuver, and it will work. The only thing worse than a gimmick is the gimmick you can’t ignore. No matter how hard you try.

Cagepotato Comments

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thisguy186- October 13, 2008 at 10:37 am
Frank and Ken's REAL parents should of just aborted them, so we wouldn't be here arguing now about them.
Frank- October 13, 2008 at 4:34 am
If we're just going for the freakshow fights, I'd like to see George Foreman come out of retirement one more time and beat the snot out of Ken, but I guessing Foreman would open a massive cut above Shamrock's eye when they touch gloves and the fight would end by stoppage in 1 sec.
MMA FAN- October 13, 2008 at 1:53 am
I'd rather watch fedor fight some freak, or minowa take on a dinosaur or some shit than shamrock vs shamrock.
Kimbo better have Seth's Money- October 13, 2008 at 1:52 am
I would like to see it too. Just like I wanted to see Kimbo vs. Ken. Just like I wanted to see Cauliflower Ear Thompson Ken. I want to see someone I do not like get the Shit kicked out of them. Previously I was hoping Kimbe would get trashed. Now for these two, I do not care. Both can get the Shit kicked out of them.

No on to important fighters, Is chuck heading down the Ken road? Getting Knocked out everytime he fights? Man the Evans Punch looked like it should have retired him. I sure wish he wasn't old like he is. I will have to find a new Fighter that knocks people the F out.
Frank- October 13, 2008 at 1:15 am
I swear I seem to remember a time when Ken Shamrock was the same age as me. Now, he's 44 and I'm 48. Maybe my memory is just failing me. In any case, he has as much business in a cage as I do at this point. Time to hang up the speedo, Ken.

Seriously, I have zero interest in this fight. I wouldn't even watch it on YouTube. How about a slap fight between the Jonas Brothers?
Big Boy- October 12, 2008 at 9:46 pm
Who wrote this? I totally agree about having to watch it. Great article.
Payday- October 12, 2008 at 9:26 pm
I'd rather see the Hughes brothers go at it.

@ C-Bus Allstar - Mary Kate and Ashley? Really? We're talking about girls that could completely hide themselves behind a flagpole.
mmafan- October 12, 2008 at 8:43 pm
Why would Ken want to fight anyone else. The old mother fucker is fighting to stay away from the Grimm Reaper every second of his worthless life. Ohhhhhh Yea and frank is an asshole too.. October 12, 2008 at 6:50 pm
remember the last Tito-shamrock fight? after the fight, during the interview with Joe Rogan, you can hear Ken whisper to Tito, " we made lots of money here, good job."

Fuking love for the sport, just money hunger over the hill cun$ts
Jeffro- October 12, 2008 at 6:47 pm
I saw these two brothers fight in a local kickboxing tournament. The announcer said, "They are fighting for their mothers love." It was classic.
Eddi- October 12, 2008 at 6:35 pm
I want to see Matt Hughes fight his twin brother...that would be wild
taxidriver- October 12, 2008 at 6:26 pm
You know what maybe it is gimmicky and both are past their prime...but, I really fucking want to see this...I don't care if I feel dirty afterwards.
Aaron- October 12, 2008 at 6:23 pm
What other brothers can fight? Nate vs. Nick Diaz?
C-Bus Allstar- October 12, 2008 at 6:20 pm
hey- October 12, 2008 at 6:19 pm
how about the jonas brothers vs. kimbo? I believe kimbo has a weakness for flaming white boys.. it'd be a good matchup
C-Bus Allstar- October 12, 2008 at 6:19 pm
I’d much rather watch Jessica and Ashley Simpson fight each other. In jell-o.

I'll see your Simpson battle and I'll raise you Mary-Kate Vs. Ashley Olsen.

Oh dang?
thisguy186- October 12, 2008 at 6:02 pm
I'd much rather watch Jessica and Ashley Simpson fight each other. In jell-o.
The Lizardking- October 12, 2008 at 6:02 pm
you tell him fenix!
and shame on you clue-by-four for even THINKING about it
strike 1 for you my friend
Fenix- October 12, 2008 at 5:56 pm
@ Clue-by-Four

NEVER, and I repeat NEVER bring the Jonas sisters into mah MMA blogosphere. Do you hear me?!

EVER! >:(
douchebaggery- October 12, 2008 at 5:52 pm
why doesn't Frank fight his dad
Clue-by-Four- October 12, 2008 at 5:52 pm
Forget the brothers from Oasis, I'd rather watch the Jonas brothers fight each other.
Fenix- October 12, 2008 at 5:52 pm
You should be ashamed of yourself Frank. TSK TSK!
Mescan_Judo- October 12, 2008 at 5:28 pm
Brother against brother? There is something not right about that. Frank could be fighting a more legitimate fighter than his brother Ken. What a waste of time for mma.
Smackdaddiest1- October 12, 2008 at 5:16 pm
@jim smith. "I rather watch the brothers from Oasis fight."

Their fight would last longer I'm afraid. That being said, I agree 100%. I'd buy that one on ppv!
jim smith- October 12, 2008 at 5:09 pm
I rather watch the brothers from Oasis fight.