(Get used to being in a cage, my man.)
Things just got worse for MMA’s favorite anarchist, Jeff Monson. He was arrested this weekend in North Carolina on a charge unrelated to his malicious mischief trouble in Olympia, Washington. Now he’s in jail on suspicion of “assault on a female and injury to real property.” Girl troubles gone terribly wrong, in other words. How disappointing.
The Olympian got the story from 30-year-old Stephanie Trapani, of Advance, North Carolina, who apparently had a thing going with “The Snowman”:
Trapani says she had a romantic relationship with Monson, but they got in an argument after found out he had romantic relationships with other women. She also alleges "he has two wives." She said she found out information about his other girlfriends on his cell phone and she then threw the cell phone out the window of her car while she was driving to pick him up at the gym. When he found out his cell phone was gone when they returned to Trapani’s home, he got angry. "He went ballistic," she said.
At Trapani’s home, Monson packed up his belongings, Trapani said. But when she told him she had thrown his cell phone out the window of her car, he grabbed her laptop and started "hitting the columns" of her home. She said Monson was enraged, and put a hole in the wall and flipped over a grandfather clock.
"He’s being charged with domestic violence and damage to property because he destroyed my house," Trapani said. "He started just bashing holes in the walls and the columns."
Damn, civil disobedience you can at least make a case for, but I’m pretty sure Henry David Thoreau never trashed some chick’s house. Sounds like Monson is not to be trifled with when it comes to both politics and matters of the heart.
If only she hadn’t thrown his cell phone out the window they could have proceeded towards an orderly break-up and never had to see each other again, except for the obligatory meeting two weeks later to exchange borrowed belongings and have sex one last time in a coffee shop bathroom.
But seriously, Monson. Two wives, bro? Sounds like just having one girlfriend is hard enough on you. Hope he has a good lawyer and some frequent flier mileage, because he now has court cases and hoes in different area codes.
(Props to MMA Payout for the tip)