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Rashad’s Reality: Evans Gives His Version of ‘Nightclub Altercation’ With Jones

Official UFC light heavyweight benchwarmer Rashad Evans – seriously, it’s been what? A year since this guy fought? – stopped by Pro MMA Radio this week to give his account of that “nightclub altercation” with Jon Jones we’ve been hearing so much about lately. Let us say from the outset that our first thought upon reading this transcript from 5th Round.com was to wonder how differently Jones’ version of events would be. Significantly, we’re betting. For now, all we have to go on however is Rashad’s take on the subject which – get your surprised face ready – makes Evans look pretty cool under fire and Jones look pretty dorky. So, you know, grain of salt and all that.

A little scene setter: Both Evans and Jones were attending the UFC fighter summit in Vegas last week when they independently decided to take in some much needed R&R (from their busy schedules of tending to injuries and defending themselves from haters on Twitter) at something called “Surrender nightclub at Encore.” Yeah, sounds shitty. Anyway, both being fairly sizable dudes in what we can only assume were just epic outfits, it didn’t take them long to find each other on the dance floor or the VIP or the champagne court or wherever the fuck dudes hang out in places called “Surrender.” From here, we’ll let Rashad pick up the narrative …

“He pulled me to the side and he said ‘Rashad, I need to talk to you. I think things are getting out of control,’” Evans says. “I thought it was pretty mature for the young guy instead of just ignoring me. First thing he said was ‘I just wanna be the first to tell you, I’m gonna destroy you. I’m gonna annihilate you and I’m gonna show the world you’re overrated. I’m gonna punish you and you’ll be my first highlight reel knockout’ and I just started laughing.”

Wait, what? Already the needle on our bullshit detector is humming a little bit. But moving on, Evans says Jones then tried to remind him of a particularly one-sided training session when Jones was brutalizing him with knees and elbows. To this, Rashad retorted at the time, he was only simulating Ryan Bader; the implicit point being that if Rashad had been simulating, uh, Rashad, things would have gone much differently. They would have gone a little more like this:

“I told him ‘Do you remember when I held you down and I was slapping you and punching you in the face and you were underneath me and you couldn’t move and then you looked me in the eye and said ‘Ok, can we get up now?’ and I said ‘No Jon, if you quit now, you’ll quit in the fight. You gotta earn your way up.’ So we fought some more and you couldn’t move some more and you said ‘Can you help me?’ and I said ‘No, you have to earn your way up.’ And we go for a little bit longer and you still can’t get up so you roll on your back to let me choke you out thinking I’d let you up and be satisfied with that, but I didn’t. I continued to make you work up.’

“I said ‘Do you remember that?’ and he said “Yeah, I remember that’ and I said ‘That’s why you don’t want to fight me’ and he was just lost for words for a second and he told me, ‘Rashad, you just motivating me. You don’t know what you started!’

“And it just went like that and it just ended when a couple people from our parties separated the two of us.”

Frankly, this account makes both guys look so lame that we’re almost inclined to think it’s accurate. Or at least partially. From what we saw from confrontations involving Evans during his season as a coach on TUF however, we’re sure things went down far more awkwardly than this, with a lot more endless repetition of phrases like, “Oh yeah? Oh yeah? Oh yeah?” and a lot more of him invading the other dude’s personal space, possibly with a swizzle stick in his mouth and possibly wearing a pair of incredibly dope sunglasses.

But instead of trying to fact check any of this – or wonder how it could possibly happen in 2011 without someone getting at least a cell phone pic of it – we’re just going to slide on our old-fuddy-duddy cap and wonder aloud if these two professional athletes, one of whom is allegedly recovering from an injury and the other of whom is allegedly preparing for a bout in August, ought to be out jawing with each other at Vegas nightspots. Especially ones called shit like “Surrender.”

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dranokills- May 20, 2011 at 12:13 am
Stak40 Says:

Thu, 05/19/11 - 01:12

Drano

I am pretty sure you hate everybody.
-----------------------------------------
thats harsh bro.....................I hate you for that.
Pen Fifteen- May 19, 2011 at 4:28 pm
@Stak
How can you claim the guy has "basically dominated" all his opponents when, since he graduated from fighting cans (let's say post-Salmon), this is clearly not true? Like I said, name a win besides the Rampage fight (again, in which he was floored in the third and nearly finished) he has over elite competition. His record is littered with cans, and his signature win was over a guy who retired two fights later. And isn't getting your ass completely handed to you by a guy who would go on to lose his next three fights in a row(we all know Shogun deserved a decision the first time) a major asterisk?
just some dong- May 19, 2011 at 1:21 pm
@ aarik

What the fuck are you talking about? I didn't complain about this article at all. Put down the pipe just for a minute and try again.
Komodo- May 19, 2011 at 1:19 pm
Lulz were had, but not a single fuck was given in return.
Stak40- May 19, 2011 at 1:12 pm
Drano

I am pretty sure you hate everybody.
dranokills- May 19, 2011 at 1:02 pm
Remember when I was on top of you?

...... uhhhhhh goddamn is this a gay porno?

"...and then...and then you slid it in, just a little at first...just the tip......."

I hate both of these 2 fags.
Cup Cheick- May 19, 2011 at 12:17 pm
Rashad of course responded to Jon Jones threat with a lot of head movement,faints and little to no action.
Stak40- May 19, 2011 at 12:16 pm
edit button please, is that too much to ask for.
Stak40- May 19, 2011 at 12:15 pm
Do you think he looks like shit or has a style you don't like. Its call MMA for a reason. No he doesn't go in and KO everybody out but he has pretty much dominated everybody he has fought besides Machida. The judging on the Tito fight was garbage and he should have won that too. I agree when he fought Rampage he fought the safe fight to win but besides that Evans has always been game even in getting KOd. And i would say he was the reason Chuck is who he is today. The KO was KO of the night and year. Go back and look but he hit Chuck with every he had flush on the chin.
Pen Fifteen- May 19, 2011 at 11:48 am
@RWR
I agree that he largely looked like shit in that fight as well, but I was trying to be charitable. It's probably worth realizing that, given what we've seen from Chuck since he was KOed by Rashad, that victory means about jack shit. So, outside of a decision win over Rampage in which he was nearly TKOed in the final round, does Rashad have a single quality win to his name? Methinks not.
LOKI- May 19, 2011 at 11:29 am
Surrender...your anus.
the silver hawaiian- May 19, 2011 at 11:24 am
This was awesome when I read it yesterday as part of the link dump.

The seven sentences of retarded speculation and interpretation didn't really spice it up any.

Isn't there something else I need to be told is newsworthy?
knucklesamitch- May 19, 2011 at 11:23 am
SHENANIGANS. There...I called it.
macreadysshack- May 19, 2011 at 11:21 am
I don't know about this being a re-posted article. Evidently, I didn't read the other one.

I think the reason why people bitch about quality here is because they'd like to see it get better and not just treat this site like it's disposable like every other fucking thing out there.

I think CP has some pretty severe inconsistencies in quality. I appreciate that people continue to point them out and not just 'go someplace else'.

It's called giving a fuck.
aarik- May 19, 2011 at 11:07 am
@ just some dong Says if CP doesn't post any original stuff then why are you here? Some of us have a life and don't just bounce from site to site all day. Thanks CP keep up the good work.
RwilsonR- May 19, 2011 at 10:56 am
@ Pen Fifteen - I actually thought FoGrif was winning the majority of that fight, but he just didn't have the chin to wade into some of those sloppy stand-up battles with Rashad. I don't know that I'd say Rashad looked particularly great in that fight.
Mdollas- May 19, 2011 at 10:54 am
@Stak40

100% reposted garbage. It was a load of crap the first time i read it, and its the same story on this article too...Nice
Anhonestmoose- May 19, 2011 at 10:50 am
"I held you down and I was slapping you and punching you in the face and you were underneath me and you couldn’t move and then you looked me in the eye and said ‘Ok, can we get up now?’ and I said ‘No "

This is possibly the gayest thing I have ever read.
Pen Fifteen- May 19, 2011 at 10:46 am
Does Rashad think that anyone gives him a snowball's chance in hell against Jones? Maybe the dude should try, I don't know, not looking like shit in a fight, something he hasn't done since the FoGrif fight back in fucking 2008.
Uppercut Magnet- May 19, 2011 at 10:43 am
That part about Rashad asking if Jones remembered their training session reminded me of Alanis Morissette's "You oughta know"
just some dong- May 19, 2011 at 10:42 am
I'm trying to think of a time when Rashad ever lied or pulled any B.S. on anyone for any reason, and I really can't come up with a "yes" for that (although my memory of TUF 2 isn't great). On the other hand, in the short amount of time that Jones has been in the limelight, he's already lied and pulled B.S. on Rashad regarding the whole hand injury thing. So I'm inclined to believe Suga's account here, in which he doesn't really take any cheap shots. It's a strange situation, to be sure.
Dizzylittlelord- May 19, 2011 at 10:38 am
however bigheaded jones is supposed to have become i really dont think he would start mouthing off like this, the whole thing is pathetic, i wouldnt even be suprised to hear this whole thing was faked after they actually fight
Uppercut Magnet- May 19, 2011 at 10:36 am
"...so after all was said and done, I gotz my shirt back! Yuy YEAH!"
Stak40- May 19, 2011 at 10:36 am
Alright, i don't typically do this but, isn't this pretty much the same article that was part of the Wednesday Link Dump? I mean it's bad enough that you copy paste other articles from other sites twice a week so you can chill for 4 hours before posting another article on that day but damn. Re-posting this shit the next day is a little much yes?
bgoldstein- May 19, 2011 at 10:34 am
"Damn, my lower lip taste good as fuck."
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