
Sure, it’s a hacky concept that you’ve probably seen before on an MMA forum, but we haven’t weighed in on it yet. Plus, Fighthype recently put together a list on the same theme that really sent us over the edge. (Lyoto Machida and Evan Tanner made their list, among other jacked and crazy-looking sonsabitches.) So without further ado, here are the fighters we wouldn’t mind coming across in a dark alley. Keep in mind that placement on this list is no judgment on their abilities as fighters, just on the fact that they look better suited to customer service or fast food restaurant management than cage fighting. Happy Friday.
***
9. Luke Cummo

8. Emmanuel Yarborough

7. Fedor Emelianenko and Wanderlei Silva (only when in drag)

5. Gina Carano

(Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle)
3 (tie). Bum Chan Kang, a.k.a. “Lee Gwan”; the fatties from DEEP’s Megaton GP


1. Art Jimmerson (on left, with boxing glove)

Who did we miss? Holler at us in the comments section with names and photo links…











Post your comment
Showing 1-25 of comments
commentsand Takanori Gomi?? he might not be intimidating.. but...that all changes after you see him fight..
and i remember watching that UFC with the guy with the glove.. it's hilarious.. because he ended up losing via sub to Royce Gracie.. but it's not what you'd think.. he didn't tap to a submission move.. he tapped because he was mounted for sooo long and he couldn't get Gracie off of him.. i think he either just got scared.. or REALLY REALLY frustrated..
either way..
his spot at #1 is rightful..
and to the guy with the comments on diego sanchez and josh kos... i would NEVER put THEM on a list like this...
-Jon Hess: An old school UFC fighter, biggest slob to ever grace the octagon, zero technique
-Joe Son: Another old school UFC joker
-Joe Lauzon: A decent fighter but pretty damn goofy looking
-Kenny Florian: A guy who ran away from Sean Sherk for 5 rounds straight
By the way, the one glove guy is hilarious! I remember seeing that idiot fight, I couldn't help but think of Balrog from Street Fighter. Who the hell wears gloves in a fight when you don't have to?
By the way, the one glove guy is hilarious!
Least
1. Ryan Shamrock - To paraphrase myself, he looks like he couldn't even take my little sister.
2. Sean Salmon - The only thing scary about this dude is what his inevitable death in the ring could do to MMA.
3. Miguel Torres - Time to shave the dirtball mustache if you're going to remain a title holder. All joking aside, this guy is super talented.
4. Takanori Gomi - Looks like he's still in grammar school. Though he might bite the recess lady's breast. How could I forget?
5. Bob Sapp - He plays with dolls.
Most
1. Kongo - can't think of a scarier dude. Not even Paulo Cesar "Just let your soul glo!" Silva is more intimidating to a random street-goer.
2. Wand - Looks like one of the monsters from "30 Days of Night." I haven't actually seen the movie, but one of the vampire things shows up in the commercial, and for a second, I thought it was a promo for UFC 79.
3. Tim Sylvia - Anyone who wondered what would happen if Sloth spent the last 25 years drinking irradiated water and supplementing that with human growth hormone--meet the "Maine-iac."
4. Joe Lauzon - Are you kidding? Least intimidating? This dude looks like fuckin' Bat Boy. He'll drink your god damn blood! Yeah, I read Weekly World News. Where else am I going to get the truth?
5. Brock Lesnar - "So...you were havin' sex with the little fella, then." Any one of these features on its own is noteworthy, but combined: Massive 280+ lb man with a flat top, Minnesota accent and gigantic dick tattooed on his chest... Don't let this man buy you a drink.
http://fighthype.com/pages/content2666.html
http://www.cagepotato.com/2008/01/15/ladies-and-gentlemen-the-future-of-mma/
Also, I don't know what it is but Fedor has a very unassuming look to him. I would probably fight him if he pushed me at a bar (and I didn't know who Fedor is). That would be a very bad mistake on my part. That is why I don't fight anybody I don't know anymore, that little 5'3 nerd could be Matt Serra!
it's a dude nicknamed "mom" - you know he should be lame, but you're kind of scared of saying anything abut it to his face, just in case that's exactly why he's nick named mom.
on an unrelated note, i have a lot of trouble deciding whether i hate BIG CHRIS or not. i'm so confused.
Sign in
Register | Lost your password?
Register For This Site
A password will be e-mailed to you.
Log in | Lost your password?