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What Your Least Favorite Fighter Says About You


(Indeed. Props: ahura)

Last night I had the misfortune of seeing about 30 seconds of the CW reality show H8R. (That’s pronounced “hater,” grandpa.) In this particular episode, Girls Gone Wild creator Joe Francis tried to convince some chick that he wasn’t in fact the greatest douchebag of our generation. His primary defense was that the girl didn’t know him personally, and was judging him based only on the “character” she knows from GGW — you know, the character he created. Awful. Just awful. And yet, I’d love to see an episode of that show starring UFC light-heavyweight champion Jon Jones.

As soon as Jones won his belt, he immediately went from a widely beloved underdog story (“he learned his striking from YouTube videos, you guys!”) to a lightning rod for message-board criticism. Exactly why some fans seem to passionately dislike Bones is a topic that we’ll discuss more in depth on tomorrow’s episode of The Bum Rush. In the meantime, I decided to revive an old CagePotato feature — “What Your Favorite Fighter Says About You” and its sequel — and twist it to reflect today’s hate-crazed MMA climate. So, for example, if your least-favorite fighter is…

JON FITCH

Let’s get one thing straight: Wrestling is not a martial art. It’s the opposite of a martial art. Wrestlers are the reason that you started taking Tae Kwon Do in the first place, when you were 12 years old. (Long story short: There were a couple of kids on the wrestling team that used to push you down and drag you around by your legs in front of everybody, and once you got your green belt in TKD they didn’t do it nearly as much.) Basically, you watch MMA for the action — more specifically the knockouts, though submissions can be cool too, sometimes. But watching a couple of dudes grab onto each other and hump on the mat for 15 minutes? That’s not fighting. That’s…you don’t know what it is, but it makes you uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable. You clear your browser history every time you finish using your laptop.

CHAEL SONNEN

The only thing you hate worse than a liar is a thief. And the only thing you hate worse than a thief is a real-estate agent. While some UFC fans find Sonnen’s trash-talk hilarious, you see him for what he really is — a slimy, racist sociopath who probably has a few prostitutes buried in his basement. And is it true that his balls are tiny and sitting up in his stomach? Just thinking about it gives you chills. You have normal-sized balls, for the record. If Rick Perry gets elected next year, you’re moving to Canada, seriously, for real this time.

TIM KENNEDY

Let’s just say that there was recently a death in your family.

RASHAD EVANS

For a long time, Chuck Liddell was your favorite fighter. Then, that cocky son-of-a-bitch Rashad Evans stole his soul. You didn’t know what to do with yourself for a while. You tried to make Fedor Emelianenko your favorite fighter, but that didn’t work out either. Rashad ruined everything. It goes without saying that you’re a Caucasian dude, not that the color of your skin has anything to do with your hatred of Rashad Evans. I mean, you’ve been around plenty of black people. One of your old co-workers was black. Kind of an awful experience, but hey, you got through it.

FEDOR EMELIANENKO

You followed Dana White on Twitter before any of your friends did, and you send him ‘@’ messages every day. One time he publicly replied to you with “ha!” when you made a joke about Josh Barnett‘s blood being radioactive. That was probably the greatest day of your life. Before that, the greatest day of your life was when you wished Arianny Celeste good luck at a photo shoot and she re-tweeted it. You got, like, 20 new followers that day. Whatever it is you do for a living, you get paid hourly. Cain Velasquez vs. Junior Dos Santos will be the greatest, most significant heavyweight fight in the history of MMA. Brock Lesnar is going to smash Alistair Overeem, and you plan on being the first person in the world to tweet “IN UR FACE!!! #strikefarce”

JON JONES

You distrust people with long arms. You read the Bible, but think the book of Philippians is way overrated. When you accidentally knocked up your girlfriend, you had the common courtesy to marry her. Everything you accomplished in life came from hard work, not from being young, or naturally gifted, or talented in any measurable way. You like Rampage because he keeps it real. You like Rashad because he has swagger. You don’t know what the hell Greg Jackson is doing down there in Albuquerque, but if the whole camp turns up dead one day from a mass Kool-Aid poisoning, it wouldn’t really surprise you. Your wife used to watch UFC with you only if Georges St. Pierre was on the card. Well, guess who her new “favorite fighter” is now? If Barack Obama gets re-elected next year, you’re moving to Australia, seriously, for real this time.

That’s about all I have energy for right now. If you’d like to see a sequel one day, shoot your suggestions in the comments section…

- Ben Goldstein

Comments

  1. mDino Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 12:49


    wtf..? im a white canadian but that whole black thing seems kinda rasict. maybe its cuz im used to seeing multiple ethnicities when i walk down the street but i prefer that. although i hope you were joking. the chael part was funny.
  2. ArmFarmer Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 12:52


    I found this article quite shallow and pedantic.
  3. JZ89 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 12:52


    meh - would have been a better article if you went past just why you hate said fighter. The title is what it says about you. Who didnt do TKD?
  4. ArmFarmer Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 12:53


    @mdino gtfo out with your pc crybaby-ness. Racism is funny, and you don't always have to take it seriously. get over it.
  5. Dizzylittlelord Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 12:56


    didnt think to include brock lesnar or anderson silva or bisping no
  6. danomite Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:00


    no Diaz or Anderson? I'm dying to see how well I match up with those two. this is kinda like MMA astrology.
  7. bgoldstein Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:03


    @ Dizzy: I did think of them, I just didn't want to spend my entire day on this. So stay tuned for part 2, aight?
  8. Master_Betty Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:11


    This had the potential to be a good article. Whoever wrote it decided to just phone it in though. Nothing clever here.
  9. smellypiratehooker Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:12


    " When you accidentally knocked up your girlfriend, you had the common courtesy to marry her." haha, still the north star of funny.
  10. BONGTAR Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:19


    Speak for yourself Ben. That black part sounded racist as hell. 'got through it?' wow.
  11. miscreant Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:21


    Wrestling isn't a martial art? Really? Any form of UNARMED COMBAT is a martial art. Don't play with semantics because you don't like wrestlers. Just because it isn't a traditional Eastern combative, doesn't make it any less of a martial art. It's almost like you're saying wrestlers aren't athletes. Last I checked, any good wrestler still beats the hell out of some fairy TKD practitioner throwing flashy, useless kicks.
  12. bgoldstein Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:37


    @ BONGTAR, miscreant: You know that these aren't my actual feelings, right? And that I'm writing each one from the perspective of a different kind of hater? And that satire can be a way to...oh fuck it.
  13. mDino Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:38


    @armfarmer Oh its funny eh? says alot about you as a person. fuckin chump
  14. CrazeeHorse Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:40


    How did you get Bisping to pose for that poster wearing his traditional British gear?
  15. skeletor Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:43


    @BG - Fuck you you racist. Next thing i know you're going to have something against purple skeletons! Please write a new article explaining why I now hate you more than Danga.
  16. k-onda Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:46


    I hate Dana White - does that count? I know he's not a fighter, but damn I hate that guy! Seriously though, I hate Brock, I'm not sure why, but I'm probably afraid of him.
  17. Houstons db Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:47


    Ha! BG's going in! How bout, Uriah, Georges, Diaz's, Cerrone/ Garcia combo pack, and all JMMA fighters...
  18. Stak40 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:48


    BG The shit was funny. Looking forward to the sequel. Think maybe you hit too close to home for some of these batches. Do what you pimpn! And fuck Sonnen but I be damned to move to Canada, dem bitches aint got no booty up there!!
  19. k-onda Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:49


    Oh, I'm gettin this thread now! I hate Ben! Aaarrghhh! CP is written by 12 years old WWE worshippers! What the fuck is satire?
  20. intercept440 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:50


    i dislike tito. i guess that makes me anti anything that generates its own gravity field....i>e> planets... and tito's head. . oh and ben next time someone calls you a rasict just call them a nigger, spic , or poor white trash, or a cracker or a jew or whatever else. dont cave in to a purple skelton's demands. i mean he's just pissed off cause he-man used to kick his ass in grade school so he dont like white people
  21. DdubleEm Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:51


    I liked it. Reminds me of when the other Ben was here. You know...actually funny. You should write more Goldstein.
  22. TheRealist Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:51


    all you dumb americans are ignorant as fuck. no booty in canada? how would u know pimpn! your just another CP nuthugger like half the ppl on here. CP has gone down the drain with these crap writers and articles. even BG's lost it
  23. Stak40 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:55


    TheRealist????What??? You talkin about Americans but i bet half of the terminology, clothes, music, swag or whatever you got probably was influenced by an American. The Realist, get the fuck outta here.
  24. Sloppyspray Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:57


    @Bgoldstein - you know your site has made it when every other comment is someone who's posting some PC bullshit or completely not understanding the point of view of the article. BTW - staying in line with everyone else's comments, "One of your old co-workers was black. Kind of an awful experience, but hey, you got through it." are you referring to Danga here? Does that mean he got fired?
  25. smellypiratehooker Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:57


    @ stak If by booty you mean lopsided ratio of fast food induced getto ass then rock on.
  26. TheRealist Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:58


    intercept440 is a dirtbag nuthugger
  27. TheRealist Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:59


    @stak b for real bro your and idiot and half of american stuff is trash
  28. monkyspunk Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:01


    How can Nick Diaz not have made it into this bit?
  29. BossNasty Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:04


    @therealist-are you fucking stupid? Yes, you are. Just cause those skinny ass rail booty bitches in canuck town have a shithole doesn't mean they have an "Ass". Been to canada seen the pretty faces nice boobs and no ass. @smellypiratehooker-you just sound like a little scrub ass dude who jerks off to fake tits.
  30. intercept440 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:06


    therealist. cant you do better than that? i mean call me something that really zings.. something like intercept440 is the greasy sweat of a fat chick sloppy mudflaps..... . . i mean your not even funny , try harder
  31. intercept440 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:07


    oh..wait it would have been funnier if you said i was the greasy sweat off a fat CANADIAN chicks sloppy mudflaps... that one would really have made me laugh
  32. O Chan Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:09


    Am I missing something? I fail to see the connection between Rashad Evans and Fedor...
  33. GistoftheFist Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:09


    It was Flavor-ade, why does nobody ever get that right.
  34. hhynike Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:10


    http://dv.gd/eky Top sex films, Sex tool for sell that you will like them
  35. Stak40 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:13


    By booty I mean when the bitch sits on a bench her tailbone don't leave a dent and it doesn't sound like someone threw a rock at the side of a canadian outhouse. Over half of the shit in america is exactly that but that don't stop most of the fucking world from trying to copy it. How's that for real bz!
  36. El Guapo Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:15


    The only thing I hate more than a dirty Jew is two dirty Jews. And the only thing I hate more than two dirty Jews is Josh F'kn Koscheck. Please include him on your next list, Mr. Goldstein.
  37. BallsDeep Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:17


    Canada is just a boring loft over a raging house party. BG: I like these satirical and funny articles, fuck all the lame asses who never get it and just bitch in the comments section Also, I'm not gonna lie, I only commented because I think TheRealist is a bitch and everything that is wrong with internet threads and people in general. I hate you. That is all
  38. tgilaura Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:24


    IN UR FACE!!! #strikefarce
  39. cabj1905 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:29


    I don't think a part 2 will be necessary. I'm sorry BG. It's just not the same without Hairy Forearms, you know?
  40. El Guapo Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:38


    (Goldsteen, Goldstine. Steenman, Steinburg. GOLDSTEIN! Holy shit, you don't think... Naaaaa, can't be. Or can it? It DOES start with Gold. Damn, I wonder. If so, my last post was pretty f'kd up. But then again I was joking. But still. Maybe I should go back and edi... Shit! I forgot the edit button is gone! Fuuuuuuuck, now what? Maybe if I just play it off, change the subject or something. Wait a minute, am I thinking out loud again? Dammit! Alright, just play cool. Let's see here...)
  41. TheRealist Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:41


    im a bitch? you guys are all ignorant idiots. no one in canada has booty?? thats not even funny or true, and here u are thinking your a big shot cuz u said it. truth is america is OBESE, and full of dumb asses like all of you. sorry for Not being a dumb rasict like most of you on here. @intercept440 say what u will i guarantee your a bitch in real life. @Ballsdeep - that name is perfect for you ps i by no means think all of america is ignorant or stupid, just these fools and ppl like them
  42. El Guapo Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:42


    So... uhhhh... UFC on Versus this weekend, eh? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=praFGD51ih8
  43. TheRealist Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:44


    there are alot of good things that come from america. but Stak40, none of that involves you or happened because of you. your using americas name to say that your better then someone, yet your probably nothing but some dumb ass with a ged who gets no pussy.
  44. intercept440 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 02:57


    1. a bitch in real life i am not. im an aging former athelte, who never quite made it, in baseball or martial arts. or tennis . 2. im not obese . 3. im not racist (i hate everyone equally) . 4. your probably a 17 to 22 yr old who was bullied in school and know trolls sites he feels like have disrespected him in some way. . 5. i know this is true because you cant even diffrentiate sarcasm and UNpolitically correct humor from the cp commenters as just joking. . 6. your girlfriend has a fat ass and you love it, hence your immediate dislike of homeboy stak40's comment (made in jest). . 7. you have thin skin and someone from america pissed in your cheerios once ( or do they call them something strange up in canada like loopty loops or something) and now you hate all thing american.. 8. im feeding a troll and i know it cause quite frankly it's amusing when your bored at your high paying job that i have. while your most likely unemployed and on some canadian assitance program. . 9.i actually have nothing against canada as i have family there and my wife is a citezan of canada. but its funny to see all you immediatly cry foul whenever your beloved country is bagged upon.... . . . i think that covers it all give me a while and ill think up some more
  45. weioooo Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 03:02


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  46. TheRealist Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 03:10


    im glad i got u so worked up about it. no i dont hate everything america. i could care less what any of you internet tough guys say about anything. your all a joke to me btw, your humor is stale and not original at all. im sure all ur lil nut huggers like it. i cant even continue this because its so pointless, Your pathetic in my opinion. period. sorry that rasict shit and talking down to canada aint funny to me.
  47. kneesnbows Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 03:18


    AMERICA, Fuck Yeah!
  48. intercept440 Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 03:19


    yep it is indeed pointless. i have to agree with you there... but look how much of an otherwise boring day at work just flew by. now its time to go home. . have fun. . p.s. racist jokes crack me up so does canada
  49. RSparrow Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 03:32


    Maybe we should do away with these articles, the comment section was full of AIDS
  50. edhedicus Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 03:36


    Pankration is the original martial art, that which ALL others derived from. I hope you didn't really mean that wrestling isn't a martial art. I hope you were using that to illustrate how retarded people are that can't appreciate Fitch for what he is, a strong wrestler. Plus, he threw a kick once... in practice... at a bag....
  51. Omar-Supreme Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 03:43


    some of ya'll fools need to learn what racism is and what a joke is. Relax, bitches.
  52. smellypiratehooker Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 03:43


    @boss nasty Really quite impressive that you got that from one little statement. Shouldn't you be out saving the world or at least swooning the ladies with your Queen coverband.
  53. weioooo Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 03:57


    http://goo.gl/7pOQ0
  54. smellypiratehooker Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 04:01


    Can this article be changed to " what your least favorite commenter says about you"
  55. MMAINMYBLOOD Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 04:10


    please Ben Dont forget Koscheck, you got all the rest tho.. oh except Schaub you forgot Schaub
  56. Buster Hyman Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 04:22


    i immediately regret bothering to read the comments section. now i know what vagina farts look like in print.
  57. AndyInflammatory Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 04:53


    well written BG - and it obviously fooled the army of simpletons that flooded over here after the last Sherdog Mass Banning. OH THATS RACIST DERRRrrr
  58. Get Off Me Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 05:00


    @BossNasty Looks like you have not visited Montreal yet. My strip clubs aren't PG, the broads get naked naked up here. @Ballsdeep Toronto and most other major cities in Canada do fall into your analogy. In Montreal we are that banging house party 7 days a week.
  59. poppin champagne Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 05:36


    the jon jones one is seriously too funny, mad props on that one.
  60. AndyInflammatory Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 05:48


    shake that bottle and make it POP
  61. AndyInflammatory Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 05:50


    ...if somebody could analyse the timeline of modern Mixed Martial Arts and determine at what point comments sections became such a twittering hive of STOOPID - that would be an article in itself.
  62. ccman Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 05:55


    Who the fuck actually wrote this? this is not what they said... it is what you think. Seriously this is why the comments section has shrunk to 12 people except on fight nights. Can someone get fired already or are we still on the "we likle this kiss ass, lets let him have admin rights" kick still going on? i was going to ask for a free CP shirt to wear in the Bud Light suite next week where i KNOW dana is going to pop in but fucking keep it. I'll wear Armani like a man.
  63. Jesus Frijoles Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 07:53


    The name of this article should be "what your response to irony/sarcasm says about your IQ."
  64. Dante Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 08:00


    this is seriously the most accurate shit, ever/
  65. Giblets Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 08:33


    That was awesome, please do Bisbing next!!!!!! That's right take the piss outta the English! I can't believe some people got offended by that, you can't say one form of humor is ok and another isn't either everything gets made fun of or nothing does. Fuck that wasn't racist there was no hate or malis behind that article. Wow I thought canadiens where cool when they're not, there just as bad as nicoracqians!
  66. ArmFarmer Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 09:16


    Buster Hymen: "i immediately regret bothering to read the comments section. now i know what vagina farts look like in print." Jesus frijoles: "The name of this article should be “what your response to irony/sarcasm says about your IQ.” Send these 2 T-shirts please. I think I'm going to sift through these comments and write 2 lists of names because this article has separated the cool kids from the mentally disabled. It never ceases to amaze me how many people on the internet completely lack the ability to pick up on sarcasm/humor/satire. If this article offended you, please kill yourself. I'm tired of having to share the world with your kind. Lookin at you Miscreant, mdino, and bongtar.
  67. dranokills Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 09:22


    mDino Says: Thu, 09/29/11 - 01:38 @armfarmer Oh its funny eh? says alot about you as a person. fuckin chump -------------------------------- lighten up man...or does your skin not do that? fuck man racist shit is a killer party favor , so relax. armfarmer is right, some of you tards totally missed what this topic is about and some of you really need to get a sense of humor.
  68. ArmFarmer Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 09:25


    Mdino @armfarmer Oh its funny eh? says alot about you as a person. fuckin chump Oh right, I'm the chump. Heaven forbid that me and an audience of mixed race, sex, age, and so forth be able to sit together and laugh our asses off at Daniel Tosh or Dave Chapel, comedians who are almost everyone considers fucking hilarious and who's acts generally revolve around racial humor. It's so wrong of me to talk about an episode of Chapel with my black coworker as we laugh about the "nigger family" or Clayton Bigsby. I'm sorry we fucking offended you so much by enjoying life and not getting sand in our vaginas every time anything slightly racial comes up. I'm sorry that we are such terrible people that we can put our differences aside and just laugh at ourselves and each other. You are so much better than I am. Congratulations on being an uptight asshole with no sense of humor that nobody wants to hang out with except other uptight assholes. Great fucking job bro.
  69. ArmFarmer Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 09:30


    Sorry for ranting, but this thread really got under my skin. People are so godamn stupid sometimes. I'm always the first to rip on cp when they do something stupid or won't respond to our requests, but I gotta side with them on this one. Article wasn't half bad, and the racism wasn't intended to be sincere, which was obvious to those of us with iq's beyond single digits.
  70. fatbellyfrank Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 10:37


    Yup, i'm a sonnen hater, I dont know who rick perry is but yea, fuck him too, and i'd happily live in Canada if it was warmer, and as a few above me have mentioned, it was a satirical piece FFS
  71. Todd M Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 11:01


    @ dranokills, 'lighten up man…or does your skin not do that?' FUCKING GOLD SIR!!!
  72. stopdrinkingpee Says:

    Thu, 09/29/11 - 11:31


    Ben, this was trash. The first “What Your Favorite Fighter Says About You” piece was gold, and the second was pretty good. This was lazy and pedantic and at no point even a little bit funny. Don't do a sequel -- or do, but put some effort into it. You're a good writer, and you should be embarrassed by this effort. Everyone sticking up for Ben as a leader in the oh-so-critical anti-PC crusades -- he basically said everyone who doesn't like Rashad and Jon Jones is racist. Ben's post is more liberal than any of the comments attacking him.
  73. rampageisgod Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 12:37


    If we hate Chael Sonnen, we have a grasp on reality. Fixed it.
  74. Giblets Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 12:40


    @ ArmFarmer good rant mate, fucking loved it!
  75. RearNakedSpoon Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 05:04


    I don't get this Joseph Ducreux picture at all, is it some modern popular culture reference?
  76. El Famous Burrito Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 05:34


    Can we all agree that Eskimos suck?
  77. flyingogoplata Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 05:56


    So I've got a question. Since Chael's balls are up in his stomach somewhere, can his opponents knee him in the groin? Should they have to avoid body shots so they don't "nut" him?
  78. flyingogoplata Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 06:15


    For Part II.... ROUSIMAR PALHARES . You are aware that something is just inherently wrong with your genetic make up because Paul Harris is the epitome of awesome. . You become irrationally jealous of anyone with a thick mat of man-fur due to your failure to hit puberty by your 26th birthday. . For some strange reason you believe that everyone is simply "entitled" to keep all four of their limbs and shouldn't have to fight to keep them. . You are likely a member of Tomasz Drwal's extended family and completely disagreed with Babalu that David Heath needed to be "taught a lesson".
  79. J3t Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 07:56


    George Bush doesn't care about black people.
  80. KarmaAteMyCat Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 08:12


    @BG; Damn Bro this time its not me setting the fire under their asses I LOVED it from start to finish. Hilarity has ensued sir and I laughed my ass off the comments section is on fire on this one. - @Stak; Keeping it real as usual I see! This shit is Hilarious and so many people are taking it so personal its just Hilarious. - @Sloppy; Wow dude I am so glad I have zero substance in my mouth when I read that it would have landed all over my monitor.
  81. RwilsonR Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 08:23


    El Famous Burrito is a consensus builder yet again. Yes, we can all agree on that. Fucking snow monkeys!
  82. ArmFarmer Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 08:23


    realist: "@stak b for real bro your and idiot and half of american stuff is trash" Oh the irony... if you are going to call someone an idiot at least form a coherent sentence when you do it.
  83. ArmFarmer Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 08:27


    Realist, basically you just claimed that stak's "and idiot" is trash, as well as "half of american stuff". Stak, how much did you pay for your and idiot? Apparently you got ripped off...
  84. KarmaAteMyCat Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 08:32


    @RWR,@Burrito; But they survive tough situations so well...
  85. thenutman69321 Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 09:13


    Lol @ the people taking this story seriously. I know sarcasm doesn't come through in typing very well but this whole article is a joke and it should be pretty obvious that it is.
  86. mDino Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 09:26


    @armfarmer yes your a chump. i do have a sense of humor but this isn't family guy. Just because your ignorant doesn't mean I am. If any of you guys talked like this in public, where im from, youd all get smashed. so say what u will, and make fun of other people to make you feel good about yourself. its no sweat off my back. Now stfu im not wasting my time with losers like you.
  87. El Famous Burrito Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 09:30


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  88. mDino Says:

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  89. mDino Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 09:33


    actually. most of the ppl who comment on this site are complete faggots in my opinion, and its ruining this site. so after 8 wholesome years, im out. Good job CP keeping such an intelligent audience. and to the few cool people on here, farewell.
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  92. ArmFarmer Says:

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    Oh mdino.. where do I begin. You obviously still haven't figured out the difference between you're and your.. so I'll start there. When you say "your ignorant", you are implying that I own something called "ignorant". I already went over this, but you obviously didn't pick up on it the first time. Obviously, YOU'RE the ignorant one. Now that that's out of the way, lets move on. You go on in the same post to claim that you aren't wasting your time with this.. then immediately post two more times.. so I'm obviously already under your skin (see how I used your). Now I see that your last post says that you are leaving this site after 8 years that you claim were "wholesome", which in my opinion calls your credibility into question. CP wholesome? I wouldn't be here if it were. What's next.. ok so beyond this site I'm nothing? That would imply that I'm anything on this site, which I'm not.. unless annoying counts. I'm pretty annoying on here. I wouldn't say that I'm terribly popular or well liked on this site, so I don't really know where you are going with that. As for a life outside of this site I actually just accepted a job offer and will be leaving my current major corporation in the dc area to go to another major corporation in San Antonio, where I'll easily be able to buy a relatively new/large house within a year. So, I'm doing pretty well outside of the comments section of cagepotato. I don't really think there's much need to go on, you do a pretty good job of owning yourself, but I will end with this: Great job condemning racism and bigotry, only to turn around and call me a faggot in your last post as you scamper away with your tail between your legs... you fucking ignorant hypocrite.
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    Man it must be hard being too stupid to understand the difference between racial comedy and actual hatred based racism. Just because you make a joke about a stereotype does not mean that you completely buy into that stereotype or hate a group of people based on that stereotype. I love black jokes, I don't hate black people. I love racist white jokes, I'm white and they don't offend me. Me and my asian friend make racist remarks to each other all the time, we don't hate each other. I know these are hard concepts for some of you to grasp...
  96. ArmFarmer Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 10:22


    @giblets Cheers! (that's what you guys say right? lol) Props to all of you who weren't offended by this article, not going to go back and collect names, you know who you are.
  97. intercept440 Says:

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    @ArmFarmer i didnt count em, but there was 3 i believe who seemed genuinely offended by an obvious comedic article. . Mdino, theUnrealist ,Bongtar(possibly its hard to gauge the bongmeister sometimes) ,miscreant (didnt like ben calling wrestling a non-martial art)though i dont think he was actually offended so we can leave him off the list. . the enusing hilarity of it all made the day worth while. . it's amazing how much a wee bit-o un-pc humor tends to enraged people. . nothing is more engaging than watching people cry about something so small. . if it was actually HATRED that the article was spewing then maybe they would have a valid point. .
  98. ArmFarmer Says:

    Fri, 09/30/11 - 11:28


    I guess I have to take some blame for being a crybaby too, as I got even more offended just by the fact that they were offended lol. But hey, it's me we're talking about. If I'm not bitching and complaining about something then somethin ain't right! Oh that reminds me, get rid of this fuckin captcha you assholes!
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